Page 1 of 2 [ 24 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next


Do you have social anxiety/phobia
Yes (diagnosed) 29%  29%  [ 12 ]
Yes (self speculation) 36%  36%  [ 15 ]
I'm not sure 14%  14%  [ 6 ]
No 21%  21%  [ 9 ]
Total votes : 42

ZombieBrideXD
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Jan 2013
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,507
Location: Canada

29 May 2016, 9:11 pm

I see a lot of people here with social anxiety, for those who don't know here are some symptoms of social anxiety/phobia

-fear of being judged
- avoiding eye contact
- low self confidence
- poor body image
- constantly worrying about what the other person is thinking about them
- avoiding crowds
- heart palpitations, sweaty palms and the feeling of the need to escape in a social situation
- avoiding approaching people (ordering food, asking for help, etc)
-nervous laughter or talking very quietly
- not being able to think clearly in a social situation
- fear of public speaking

I have general anxiety but not social anxiety, however I DO have a fear of bullies in school. But a fear of judgement has never bothered me, I don't feel dread in a social situation. I just find socializing difficult, not scary.


_________________
Obsessing over Sonic the Hedgehog since 2009
Diagnosed with Aspergers' syndrome in 2012.
Diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder Level 1 severity without intellectual disability and without language impairment in 2015.

DA: http://mephilesdark123.deviantart.com


B19
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jan 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,993
Location: New Zealand

29 May 2016, 9:22 pm

Yes, I do. In my case, I believe it developed via a series of unfortunate experiences in childhood, adolescence and young adulthood rather than being a co-factor in my personal constellation of Asperger's Syndrome.

The only upside of it for me has been meeting some of the nicest people I have ever met, ie members of the same Meet-Up group I go to for people who struggle with social anxiety (SA). It's a wonderful group.

For some it is an isolated anxiety unrelated to anxiety in other contexts, while others (like me) contend with the battle against anxiety in several different forms simultaneously and continuously. There are so many SA flow-on effects, eg avoiding encounters with strangers who judge you make job interviews potentially psychologically traumatic and can flood sufferers with so much cortisol that they literally cannot think. I have experienced this and many other aspects.

Knowing people who geniunely relate and understand and walk in the same shoes has really been immensely validating and heartwarming for me. For me personally, social anxiety has a far greater impact on my daily life at this stage of my life than Asperger's Syndrome does. Unlike Asperger's Syndrome, from my perspective SA has no positives.



League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,302
Location: Pacific Northwest

29 May 2016, 9:31 pm

I find how people react unpredictable and I have no idea what they will be offended by or how they will take things so it makes me too nervous to talk to people and to ask them questions so I tend to not say much. I also fear rejections like I will do something wrong or be perceived wrong because I will screw up socially. I have always been rejected and always been perceived as mean or being told "none of your business." I used to not be like this as a child because I was unaware of how people perceive them and how they feel and I only thought it was just that one person, that's it. I didn't generalize. I was only naive.

I also get nervous in new situations so I have a hard time going in there and doing it. It has nothing to do with fear of being judged or whatsoever.

Confrontations also make me uncomfortable and I get nervous talking to my boss. There is no rational reason.

Textbook SA doesn't fit but it's close enough to describe how I feel when I get nervous in social situations. But I don't feel I have a lot of it but it does affect me enough to impact me.


_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.

Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.


mikeman7918
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Mar 2016
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,929
Location: Utah, USA

29 May 2016, 11:34 pm

I am diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder like the OP, but no diagnosis of Social Anxiety. I do however meet most of the posted criteria, I am often shaking a bit and not able to think strait when doing any form of public speaking, and sometimes I am too nervous to start a conversation with a friend or sibling for no particular reason. So yeah, I'd say it's very likely that I have social anxiety too.


_________________
Also known as MarsMatter.

Diagnosed with Asperger's, ADD, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder in 2004.
In denial that it was a problem until early 2016.

Deviant Art


ToughDiamond
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2008
Age: 72
Gender: Male
Posts: 14,534

30 May 2016, 1:05 pm

fear of being judged - Not exactly fear, but a preoccupation.
avoiding eye contact - I don't avoid it, I more forget to do it, though some people seem to grimace at me in what I sense is a false way, so I avoid looking at them.
low self confidence - I have some problems with confidence but it's sporadic and in some ways I'm downright gung-ho and arrogant, so that's not really a yes.
poor body image - A smattering of that but again the situation isn't exactly grave.
constantly worrying about what the other person is thinking about them - I guess that's much the same thing as fear of being judged, so again it's a preoccupation not really a fear.
avoiding crowds - They don't scare me, I just hate them, they annoy me and tire me.
heart palpitations, sweaty palms and the feeling of the need to escape in a social situation - No panic symptoms, just a strong desire to leave.
avoiding approaching people (ordering food, asking for help, etc) - Some truth in that, but as long as it's fairly clear that the person to be approached is there for just that purpose (e.g. shopkeeper, service provider), I'm fine. If there's doubt about their approachability then I'll probably avoid it unless it's important to be a tad brave.
nervous laughter - no, I laugh to discharge tension but I don't think it looks or sounds like a nervous laugh.
talking very quietly - I don't like raising my voice and I won't normally talk at all in a loud environment, but it's more a sensory issue and a disdain for shrillness in self and others.
not being able to think clearly in a social situation - Yes but it's the same when I'm alone in any noisy or distractive environment.
fear of public speaking - No more than the average person, the challenge of it attracts me, and when I've spoken to a group at any length, I've done well. I've had anxiety which has threatened to shut me down but only when there's been conflict and aggression in the group and I've believed myself to be in real danger, and even then I've been able to continue.

So I really don't think I have social anxiety, though I voted "don't know" because I'm a scientist by trade so I'm wary of jumping to conclusions.



Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 26,492
Location: UK

30 May 2016, 2:54 pm

Quote:
-fear of being judged

Definitely.

Quote:
- avoiding eye contact

Eye contact is natural for me, except when passing strangers in the street. I suddenly become aware of where I'm looking and I just find it awkward to pass a stranger and feel obliged to look at them, only to see them staring back at me, which makes me feel more self-conscious.

Quote:
- low self confidence

I do have low self confidence. I think that people think I'm stupid and unimportant.

Quote:
- poor body image

I don't think I'm fat, but I wish I was a bit shorter in height and I worry that I look funny, like in body language.

Quote:
- constantly worrying about what the other person is thinking about them

Yes, I am always worrying about what people think. It's so annoying when other Aspies tell me not to care what others think, just because it's an Aspie stereotype to not care.

Quote:
- avoiding crowds

I can't stand crowds, I feel like I can't focus and I keep getting in people's way, and people jostle me, stare at me, walk into me, and I just get anxious. Also too many children make me anxious, like if it's a week-end or school break or rush hour times, I just find small children unpredictable and they make crowds seem more crowded.

Quote:
- heart palpitations, sweaty palms and the feeling of the need to escape in a social situation

Yes, quite often. A couple of years ago my cousin had a wedding, and the reception afterwards was from 3.30pm til midnight, somewhere where I wouldn't be able to escape until a coach came to pick us up at midnight. I knew I would get palpitations, extreme shyness, extreme boredom (because I don't drink), sweating, headache and severe agitation because of wanting to go home. So I just turned up to the wedding to see them get married, then went on home before the coach came to pick everybody else up and take them to where the reception was held, which was miles away from home. I did feel bad, but I just couldn't stick all those hours just sitting there watching my peers getting drunk, while I could be doing stuff at home.

Quote:
- avoiding approaching people (ordering food, asking for help, etc)

I've trained myself to be more confident at this, but ordering food does make me anxious, especially at McDonald's, because the staff there are impatient and in a hurry and it's so noisy I feel afraid they might not hear what I'm ordering properly.

Quote:
-nervous laughter or talking very quietly

Yes, I do a lot of nervous laughter when I don't know what else to say. Also I speak quietly, not monotone, but I do have a ''weak voice'', so I don't often get heard when joining in a group conversation, hence why I sit quietly and not say a lot.

Quote:
- not being able to think clearly in a social situation

Often when in a social situation I'm spending my whole time taking in what everyone's doing (their body language, conversations, etc), but I'm unsure of what to do or what to say. I feel when at certain social situations, like at a bar, I can't be myself, and I'm trying to join in group talk but I feel like they're thinking ''go away you nosy parker!''

Quote:
- fear of public speaking

I never quite understand what this means, as, unlike the rest of the symptoms here, public speaking is not exactly something that comes up every day. By public speaking, does it mean you are talking through a microphone in a shopping mall? Because I don't think I'll ever need to do that in my life.


Also, I often get very sensitive when a person in authority is rude to me. Most people think ''oh, he/she was just a rude person, who cares?'', but I walk away feeling upset thinking that they hate me or something, or I look like a stupid idiot which makes them think they can speak how they want to me. Like at the week-end when shopping with my friend I went to get a cold drink from a candy shop, and it's a serve yourself thing. So when I asked for a large cup to fill up, the cashier said in a rather firm tone ''can I ask you not to overfill it please??'' as she gave me the cup. But I didn't hear her say that to anybody else who was asking for a cup, and I didn't see a sign anywhere reminding people not to overfill the cups, so I felt it was aimed at me personally, and then I felt anxious about it for the rest of the day. Little things like that, what probably wouldn't worry others, do worry me.


_________________
Female


underwater
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 10 Sep 2015
Age: 48
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,904
Location: Hibernating

30 May 2016, 3:32 pm

I'm really uncertain about this. Yes, I have some of those symptoms, but not others. For ex., I have no fear of public speaking. I probably should have.

What really bugs me is stuff like today, when I had some errands. I have to say hello to a couple of people I know who were acting a bit funny the last time I saw them. I totally freeze, turn away quickly even though I'm trying to force eye contact, and generally look absolutely bizarre. I hate this s**t. But the reason I do it is that the sun is shining after a couple of rainy days, and my eyes haven't caught up with the different light levels, and I feel raw. If it had been raining, I'd have been able to fake it.



Lumi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Sep 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,513
Location: Positive-minded

30 May 2016, 3:59 pm

Having okay self image and good self-esteem is what I have. The autism might make it seem less. I have non-social anxiety.


_________________
Slytherin/Thunderbird


Unfortunate_Aspie_
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 7 Sep 2015
Age: 33
Posts: 579
Location: On the Edge of...

30 May 2016, 5:03 pm

ZombieBrideXD wrote:
I see a lot of people here with social anxiety, for those who don't know here are some symptoms of social anxiety/phobia

-fear of being judged
- avoiding eye contact
- low self confidence
- poor body image
- constantly worrying about what the other person is thinking about them
- avoiding crowds
- heart palpitations, sweaty palms and the feeling of the need to escape in a social situation
- avoiding approaching people (ordering food, asking for help, etc)
-nervous laughter or talking very quietly
- not being able to think clearly in a social situation
- fear of public speaking

I have general anxiety but not social anxiety, however I DO have a fear of bullies in school. But a fear of judgement has never bothered me, I don't feel dread in a social situation. I just find socializing difficult, not scary.

Hmm- this is interesting.
I have almost all of these symptoms- but it got so bad for me that I started dissociating and then it was a ... real problem anymore. For some reason eye contact is never a problem for me. I make too much eye contact. :mrgreen:
However, I will say, a lot of my anxiety went down after I left school- school was a huge huge huge stressor for me- I feel like once your out of that system it's better.



friedmacguffins
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,539

30 May 2016, 5:55 pm

I have found that I do not have social apprehensions, so come across as being blunt or brave.

I have talked to movie stars (usually, inadvertently), clerics, and officials, am prone to a more peaceable sort of anarchism, like the Golden Rule. If you mean to be pragmatic and mostly harmless, they look like insecure, compulsive liars.

Say what Charlie Bucket (from Willy Wonka), Nello (from A Dog of Flanders), Forrest Gump, or Karl Childers would say, and they'll think you're magic, like you always have your act together or are several steps ahead of the conversation.



GodzillaWoman
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Dec 2014
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 743
Location: MD, USA

30 May 2016, 6:36 pm

I don't think I always had it, even though I was bullied in school, but a series of friendships and relationships that ended badly has made me very leery of getting close to people, and very anxious about my ability to navigate a social situation successfully. I've had friendships, romantic partners, and relatives who mostly had me around so they could use me for something or abuse me. When I finally said I couldn't give them all the things they demanded because I was exhausted (or broke), they would scream at me about what an awful person I was, or just leave. My sister-in-law said I was "hell to live with" when I didn't have time to clean up after her kids any more because I needed to study more (I lived with my brother while at university. It lasted a month). Even my mom called me a sick psychopath when I came out of the closet. I finally just decided I wasn't any good at picking loved ones (other than my spouse, and she suspects she is ASD too).

I'm trying to get more social again but it is really a scary thing--I go to an autism meet-up group once in a while, and am taking a social skills class.


_________________
Diagnosed Bipolar II in 2012, Autism spectrum disorder (moderate) & ADHD in 2015.


Tiankay
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 27 Apr 2016
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 205
Location: 3rd Street on the right, just after the event horizon...

30 May 2016, 7:34 pm

Yes i have it. I dont need no doctor to tell me that. But its not like i dont feel worth peoples time or something like that, its just from alot of bad experience in life.

- fear of being judged
Yes and no. I usually dont really care when others judge me, but i do judge myself to often.
- avoiding eye contact
Yes, but that was always there, even before i got social anxiety
- low self confidence
Most of the time yes, but there are things i know i am good at and im pretty confident about me when it comes to these topics
- poor body image
No. Im pretty slim and not so attractive but thats ok. There are people far uglier than me^^
- constantly worrying about what the other person is thinking about them
YES. That developed late in school because of all the bullying. I figured that something has to be "off" with me or why else would they always bully me, no matter where i got to.
- avoiding crowds
Most of the time, but again. I never liked crowds to begin with. I only attend to ones on things i really enjoy like car shows or some concerts.
- heart palpitations, sweaty palms and the feeling of the need to escape in a social situation
Yes
- avoiding approaching people (ordering food, asking for help, etc)
Rarely. That waiter gets paid to serve me so please bring me my food then ;)
-nervous laughter or talking very quietly
No
- not being able to think clearly in a social situation
sometimes
- fear of public speaking
Im not sure. Would depend on the context and if i have to speak free or read off a sheet of paper. I used to make music and even gave a concert one time. Was pretty excited before it started but no anxiety there...

Peace
TK



btbnnyr
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 May 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,359
Location: Lost Angleles Carmen Santiago

30 May 2016, 8:19 pm

I have become increasingly socially unanxious.


_________________
Drain and plane and grain and blain your brain, and then again,
Propane and butane out of the gas main, your blain shall sustain!


r00tb33r
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 May 2016
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,953

30 May 2016, 8:52 pm

I don't think the distinction diagnosed/undiagnosed is particularly relevant here, you yourself know whether you have anxiety in social situations or you don't.

Aside from NT members on this board this should basically apply to all of us.



Ganondox
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Oct 2011
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,778
Location: USA

30 May 2016, 11:11 pm

I have social anxiety, but it's fairly atypical, being extreme in some situations and very mild in others.


_________________
Cinnamon and sugary
Softly Spoken lies
You never know just how you look
Through other people's eyes

Autism FAQs http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt186115.html


ocdgirl123
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Oct 2010
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,809
Location: Canada

31 May 2016, 1:30 am

I think so.

Problem is, I have severe social anxiety in some situations, and little to none in others. At work, I only have a bit of social anxiety, when it comes for asking for requests I don't think will be granted, but have no social anxiety otherwise. However, I have severe social anxiety in college.


_________________
-Allie

Canadian, young adult, student demisexual-heteroromantic, cisgender female, autistic