It seems I have ASD

Post Reply New Topic

I have been lurking on this forum for over a year trying to find the right answers for me. I have always struggled with changes at home and at work, problems with understanding friendships and relationships. I know this has been the case since I was small and I have always managed my life to minimise the changes so as to avoid anxiety associated with changes. When changes are about to happen my anxiety levels spike (nausea, feeling in stomach, odd feelings in arms and legs) and I have had several periods of ADs after seeing the GP but I was never convinced that this was the root of my problems. Once the symptoms subsided I could return to careful management again.

A few years ago my partner and I saw a documentary about ASD and she said it all sounded just like me. The programme website had a link to a screening tool (the AQ) so we both gave it a go. She scored normally, I scored very high. Not convinced she took the test again answering the questions based on her knowledge of me and getting the same result. When I next had a period of anxiety I asked the GP who said not to worry.

About 18 months ago some significant changes at work happened which I couldn't avoid, being moved to a new job within a new employer. I struggled but eventually got through but then was forced to change jobs again to something far less familiar and I lost the plot at that point. Again I started seeing the GP and was put on ADs and had some counselling too. This GP agreed that ASD could explain my problems and I was referred to a psychiatrist although I had to wait several weeks for an appointment and fill in the AQ etc. When I was seen it helped to unload on the psychiatrist and my meds were changed and I started to feel more normal again as the meds started to do their job, or so I thought. Another change, another anxiety spike and the meds clearly weren't working. Psychiatrist concluded anxiety more likely than ASD (but needed a psychologist to actually assess) and said its a big step to conclude ASD as it means my brain is physically different, upped my meds and referred me for CBT. I was happy with this and waited.

I went for my initial CBT consultation and it turned out to be a really good experience as the psychologist concluded ASD is very likely and we didn't discuss CBT at all. I'm just waiting for the letter to arrive confirming this and I'm due to go back for a follow up appointment soon to discuss further.

I have to say my experience of MH services has been good once I was "in the system". I can see the psychiatrists point regarding the finality of an ASD diagnosis, i.e. it can't be "cured" whereas anxiety possibly could be. I am heartened by the psychologists assessment though and if, as now appears inevitable, ASD is the diagnosis then I'm ok with that. Despite the problems it has caused me I can reconsider what I want from life and find the right path, rather than constantly berating myself for not being able to cope with what others can and looking at things that I can't achieve.

I am happy the system seems to be working for you.

It seems as though there may be a real problem there. I know how you feel though. School got really challenging after my last move and i burnt out for the second time. :/ im still trying to get in contact with my psychologist but my email isnt working. I hope you find what your looking for.

Try to keep in mind that a diagnoses isnt just a label, its a tool for psychologists and doctors to make the appropriate steps to helping you. Dont be discouraged if its not the diagnoses you expected.

I've found the diagnosis of autism relieving. I couldn't function socially and always had such difficulties socialization and I blamed myself . Getting the diagnosis made me understand that these problems were due to things I couldn't really change, it made me less frustrated and depressed about my constant failures.

I found out about ASD when I was 11 years old and independently self-diagnosed at this point. ASD has become my special interest. Since my self-diagnosis, I have really wanted to be formally diagnosed as an affirmation of my suspicions (which have not changed since). I am happy for Skywatcher1891 that you are making progress with your diagnosis. Unfortunately, my parents don't want to even accept the possibility that I may be Aspie. I cannot talk to them about it without them getting angry.

Does it make you happy to be potentially getting a diagnosis? I will probably have to wait until I am an adult and can see a doctor independently of my parents (with whom I have a very bad relationship anyway).
Good luck.

My parents are both doctors, but don't want me to be Aspie (or similar). They therefore tell me straight: 'You are not like that. You do not have Autism.' They don't appear to realise that they are unqualified to make a judgement about whether or not I have ASD (being close family). When I am an adult and independently seek a diagnosis, I probably won't even tell them, as they are unsupportive in the extreme in this matter.
Ironically, they kept me down in preschool because of my lack of social skills, and refused to let me skip grades (although my teachers recommended it) for the same reason.
I hope that you find your 'root cause' and it leads to a good outcome for you.