Empathy question - humans
For those of you with empathy problems - does this relate to every creature, or just humans?
I find I am able to feel something for animals, plants and other creatures, but feel nothing toward humans.
This is of course all unclear and difficult, inconsistent and hard to understand, but it seems to be the case that I can understand an inkling of empathy for other creatures that is missing when relating to humans.
Experiences?
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Alexithymia - 147 points.
Low-Verbal.
non human animals experience life on a basic and pure level. they can not lie.
what you see is what they are. i have the whole range of feelings that non human animals have, so i can tell how they are feeling and feel it (kind of) with them.
humans are behind many layers of deception for the most part.
it is impossible to know what basic pure thing they are feeling because humans pretend all the time whether they know it or not.
as shakespeare said "all the world is a stage".
everyone's feelings shine through so many filters before they get to the outside world, that what gets out there is just an act based on how they feel.
people like to adorn themselves with personality characteristics that they choose to adopt, and it is all just an act.
Well yes it is easier to understand or feel compassion for animals. It's kind of pathetic actually we have trouble with humans, after all, it is what makes people human to be able to understand and communicate with one another. I want to someday be able to feel more, and it's also pathetic so many autistics seem to be fine with not caring about that whole thing and sticking to their special interests and pets. Like a stubborn child thinking his cartoons are superior to a feature film.
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I want to apologize to the entire forum. I have been a terrible person, very harsh and critical.
I still hold many of my views, but I will tone down my anger and stop being so bigoted and judgmental. I can't possibly know how you see things and will stop thinking I know everything you all think.
-Johnnyh
I can exhibit extreme empathy for animals, especially pets that I have grown close to. Humans are difficult for me, though. But I was mortified when I learnt of Bowie's passing.
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"Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don't plan it, don't wait for it, just let it happen. " - Special Agent Dale Cooper, Twin Peaks
I find I am able to feel something for animals, plants and other creatures, but feel nothing toward humans.
This is of course all unclear and difficult, inconsistent and hard to understand, but it seems to be the case that I can understand an inkling of empathy for other creatures that is missing when relating to humans.
Experiences?
What happens if a human expresses a strong emotion right in front of you? Do you feel nothing in most situations, or does it depend on the subtlety, or some other factor?
I find that I often have trouble reading what people are feeling, so it's better for me to just ask. As a blind person, I can't see body language, and I don't have any pets, so I don't understand what animals feel at all until someone puts it into words. Except for a few basics, like wagging tail for happiness or crying for sadness or a couple of fear responses.
For humans, I start to feel more of what the other person feels, the more I understand their story and their situation. Without that deeper understanding, I feel very little of what the other person is feeling, unless they are strongly expressing their emotions.
Disclaimer: I don't have a diagnosis of ASD.
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
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Location: the island of defective toy santas
I find I am able to feel something for animals, plants and other creatures, but feel nothing toward humans.
This is of course all unclear and difficult, inconsistent and hard to understand, but it seems to be the case that I can understand an inkling of empathy for other creatures that is missing when relating to humans.
Experiences?
I always feel sad for buildings when they get torn down and I used to feel sorry for streets when horses would poop on them during parades. I also felt sorry for the cars monster trucks would run over in monster truck shows.
When I watch documentaries like if I watch about aggressive kids and the kid is obviously suffering themselves because they don't like the way they are and the fact the system is failing them, I find it all sad for the child that they are being failed by the system. I saw one documentary last night where a boy had severe behavior issues he had to be taken from his home and put in a institution which was a regular house and he would get shuffled from home to home because of his behavior. His parents had to give up their parental rights to make him a ward of the Canadian state because it was the only way they could help him so they had to pick between getting him help or him. So they gave him up and the boy was a ward of the state and he eventually killed himself. So sad. I think they tried their best. I also think it's sad that parents have to be forced to pick between their child and help.
As for animals, I didn't feel much empathy for them. Allistic people seem to read animals better than I can because how many times have I been told "He doesn't like you doing that" about their dog? Whenever I see a roadkill, I just think "Oh a roadkill" and not feel anything. But when I accidentally ran over a squirrel I felt bad but I got over it. I wouldn't hit an animal on purpose or even try to. We even had a dead possum at our house because someone hit it with their car and then someone put it on our flower bed and I didn't feel anything for the animal. But yet when I saw a dead cat one time, I gasped and felt sad because this was a domestic cat and I couldn't imagine someone losing their pet. It was in a bag and I hoped it wasn't animal cruelty. It was hidden behind a bush and I saw it as I walked by.
I have been told I lack empathy and have some of it but not much and I have been accused of not caring and only thinking of myself.
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Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
^ Feeling empathy for humans being most common among humans, seems strangely inconsistent that you should feel empathy for inanimate things, but nothing toward animals. Seems we're exactly opposite.
I don't like it. Don't know what to do about it, don't understand it, and dislike someone else inflicting it on me. I will assume they can't control themselves. If someone is communicating an experience that involved strong emotion I can handle that, but the visceral display of it is unpredictable and seems somehow ... Repellent? I don't know. It's not exactly a social acceptable response.
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Alexithymia - 147 points.
Low-Verbal.
I always feel sad for buildings when they get torn down and I used to feel sorry for streets when horses would poop on them during parades. I also felt sorry for the cars monster trucks would run over in monster truck shows.
I can sort of understand if a building is steeped in history or the cars being crushed were classics. I cannot get my head around feeling sad for a road coz it was pooped on. Can you explain to yourself why you feel sad or do you just feel sad and thats it.
I'm the opposite in this respect , If I see roadkill I usually have to vocalise my feelings "Aww , a bunny" etc. If it was a domestic pet it would be worse for me but I would feel sorry for the animal , the owner wouldn't even occur to me.
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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard
auntblabby
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^^^ to answer your question about feeling sad about things getting abused, I can say at least in my own case, that all my life, things have treated me better than people, so in that respect they are my friends, and I don't like to see my friends get abused so that is why I get bothered when I see such happening.
I can sort of see the logic. Do you feel guilty using your favourite chair as by using it you are ultimately bringing about it's end?
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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,795
Location: the island of defective toy santas
I can sort of see the logic. Do you feel guilty using your favourite chair as by using it you are ultimately bringing about it's end?
no sir, that is USE and not ABUSE. now if I gained 200# and plopped myself down on it repeatedly, that would IMHO constitute abuse and i'd feel sad for any chair so treated.
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