Why do ppl shun me?

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I'm making an effort to chat with ppl now but they never want to talk with me. Not in a mean way but like they are unsure. Idk what the problem is. I don't smell bad and I dress ok and my ASD I'd not that apparent. Also the ppl I mean have known of me for a year and see me a lot. Things like this make me wonder why I'm bothering. If ppl don't notice me then I can do a lot and not get in trouble but once ppl notice me I can't do much... lol

You kinda lost me.

You saying one thing, and then contradicting it by saying another thing.

My guess is that your first point is the serious point: you wonder why folks avoid talking to you.

The second one (I suppose) is just a flip joke- that if folks DID talk to you then you wouldnt "get things done".

So the question of "why do folks avoid me?" is what you want us to respond to.

But also the joke part is kinda confusing. You are saying that folks who DO know you for a long time cause you to waist time. Is that because they are friendly and chat with you? Or is it because they somehow "get you in trouble"?

Maybe you're trying to talk to the wrong people.

It took me a long time to learn that. There are good people in the world. If someone isn't into hanging with you, move on to one of the 4 billion people on this earth you haven't tried yet. The earth is too big and too populated to waste your time with people who can't see how cool you are.

If these people have known you a year and now suddenly you want to chat, they are probably flummoxed by a change of course.

I have found it is much easier to break into a social circle when you are new, than once you have been around for a while. Merely being new to the group is a plausible conversation opener. Once folks have pigeon-holed you in their own mind as a "loner" or "introvert," they are less likely to warm up to you later.

I think it's the latter; a joke about the "positive" side of being ignored being that he gets away with more, while being noticed means being critiqued for the littlest things or "can't do much... [without getting criticized for it]".


There are expected rules about greetings and responses, and some people are incredibly staunch about this. I don't know if that's what you're encountering, but it's probably worth getting a feel for how they interact. Listen to how they greet each other, what they say and when. And once you get a feel for that, try to find someone interesting to talk to.

I think OP means that they sort of treat socializing as a chore. Now that OP's actually trying to talk to people and they're just blowing OP off, OP figures its just a waste of time and could've done something else they actually enjoy in the meantime.

Yeah pretty much