Problems at work - Advice needed

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Hi, I am having problems in work.

I am just wondering whether this is a breach of the Equality act, and if it is… what can I do about it?

I will start by saying this person is a bully, she has no problem talking down to people, shouting at them and putting pressure on them when there really isn’t any need. Anyway, I’ll explain what has happened:

It started off about 4-5 months ago, I had been told by my temporary line manager(while my line manager was on holiday) I was talking too much on section (with 2 guys on my team that I have a lot in common, most of our talking was about gaming) and the boss had noticed, I politely told her that it’s okay as I am on my break.
Around the same time I had been put on a different type of work that I had barely done before (literally did a couple of hours on it a few months previous to it). I was given no training of any sort and just got told to get on with it. After a couple of weeks on this work I was brought into the office and told I wasn’t doing enough and it wasn’t acceptable. I had a bit of a break down and told her all the s**t I’m currently going through in my life (money pressures and work life balance etc) as well as the fact I was currently waiting to be diagnosed for Asperger’s Syndrome. I couldn’t calm myself down and she sent me home for the rest of the day on sick.

Later that afternoon at home I had a phone call from the boss (the person I have the problem with). She informed me that we had to have a meeting together the next day to discuss my issues and to try and get my target to a better place. I agreed not thinking it would be any sort of problem at all and we had our meeting. I explained all my personal problems and the problems I had with that type of work (that I had no formal training and gave her a few legitimate reasons why I wasn’t hitting the target – Main one being they were not recording the stats correctly, I can explain more about this if need be but I don’t think it’s relevant, she basically didn’t listen to what I had to say about that at all). They were trying to tie it up with the talking on section and had moved me to another part of the section that morning before I had the meeting with the boss. It was very embarrassing and difficult for me to explain to everyone that asked why I had moved seats as you can imagine. I did ask to be sat back on my old team as I didn’t feel comfortable where I was, this was agreed and I moved back to my old seat.
Later that day I discovered that it wasn’t just me not hitting the targets but EVERYONE that was on that type of work were not hitting it, there was a meeting with those people about not hitting their targets and I was left out of it.
The next day I had been in since 7 and had ‘talked’ on 3 separate occasions with one of the lads I had the talking troubles with, 2 of them were about work… and lasted no more than 2 minutes at best… anyway, 9am the boss came over and asked me to come in the office with her. Right off the bat she started shouting at me saying “after yesterday’s talk I have heard from 4 team leaders that you have been talking again” I said that it was rubbish and asked her for the names of the people as I was going to take it further, she stated that we’ll just let this one slide and I left it at that (stupid I know). She kept shouting at me after this stating she was hearing conflicting information on section about my financial issues. So she was talking with people (that really didn’t know my situation that well) about my private life… is this even legal?? My anxiety by this time (bare in mind she knew I was waiting to be diagnosed for ASD) was through the roof. She went further to threaten me that my end of year performance is going to be affected by this and it will be marked down as a cause for concern.

Luckily I went away on holiday for 2 weeks after this, so I could calm myself down a bit. When I came back all the guys I used to sit with had moved to completely different parts of the building, I was also moved to a different team.
I think about a week after this I had a week off because I done something to my back (literally could not walk for a number of days). Normally the process for calling in sick is to speak to the boss on day one and then to the line manager every day after that. However, my boss insisted that I call her each and every day, despite by this point I was getting a lot of anxiety by talking to her as I was very aware of the things she is capable of.
Couple of weeks after this I had my mid year review. I confirmed with my old line manager that my mid year is going to be a middle (not a cause for concern). I was happy with this as I had over performed from the start of the year and did many things to help people on section.
My happiness was short lived however as the next day she pulled me in a room to say that the boss had overruled it, by this time I already had my diagnosis for Asperger’s and they have had this in writing from the mental health team too, so they know.
This caused me a massive amount of stress and anxiety and was starting to affect me out of work too.
I had taken a further sick day a few days after this as I had literally not slept at all one night because of my little boy being ill, being ill myself I couldn’t go into work(this is literally the worst year of sickness me and my family have ever had). I called in and spoke to my line manager as the boss was not available, I told her the entire situation and that it was okay to be called by the boss. After hanging up I managed to get my little boy to sleep and tried to go for some sleep myself. In the mean time she had called me (twice) and then shortly after sent a threatening text message saying if she hasn’t heard from me with in 10 minutes she’ll be at my house. LUCKILY I woke up and called her, in which she again started shouting at me saying she had called over 10 times (another lie – as I have 2 missed calls on my phone) trying to make out she was concerned and making sure I knew what the process was…
This incident, on top of everything else she’s put me through has actually put me on medication – I originally started taking 10mg of citalopram and have since moved up to 20mg. I am in a serious state of depression and I am really not happy in work, the surroundings or the way she has treated me.
I am too scared to talk, and I really feel like I’ve been a victim in all this.

Before I was put on this type of work and afterwards I was hitting my target consistently, it appears they wanted a fall guy or someone to set an example of at the cost of my happiness.

So I am asking, what are my options? I have told all this to my union and they have been absolutely useless, even though they have agreed that I am being bullied. I am reluctant to ask for any more help from them.

I'm sorry to hear all this, but it does sound in many ways horribly familiar. I haven't had the precise experiences you've described but several over the years revolving around very specific problems with senior staff and sickness and my suspicions about their underhandedness. Plus, being treated like a child: being told off for talking and moved away from people? I've seen it before - what do they think you are, school children? It's idiotic.
I can only sympathise with that situation where the designated manager you have to deal with while having serious personal trouble is the specific one you don't feel respects you or your privacy at all. It ought to be severely punishable for anyone in a management position to discuss your situation, but they tend to, just as a kind of spiteful small talk at the very least.
I'm a union person, but I can also sympathise with being horribly underwhelmed by reps, to the extent that I've left a union over their lack of interest before.
Your situation, to me, goes from sad and frustrating to alarming here, though:

That sounds like grounds for a grievance or at least some sort of formal complaint. Threatening to come to your home?? Go to hell!
But having the energy to navigate your employer's system which will in any case be likely stacked against you is no simple thing, is it? Some times it is necessary under our particular circumstances to give time for the rage of the injustice to pass enough to let the whole thing go. It's bad for our esteem and dignity, but sometimes the personal risk to stability and the capacity to work of opposing your bosses is sadly too much. What I mean to say is, it seems you have solid grounds to make a formal complaint, but there's also no shame in calculating that it wouldn't, all things considered, be worth it. You must protect your stability.

I can only recommend that, if feasible, you do not attend any more meetings, however they're described ('chats' or whatever) without a representative. Even if they aren't union - you're entitled to be accompanied, and to notice of any meetings, and having a witness generally has a powerful effect on management's tone, as they understand that they must at least sound reasonable, and follow their own procedures, if you have back-up. From experience my main outlet for the unhappiness these things can cause was always taking opportunities to describe the injustices to anyone in work who you trust. It often seems that almost everyone is carrying major grievances, often against the same managers. It's therapeutic to rage about it, so long as your audience is more-or-less trustworthy and you don't go too far

Sometimes raising your issue in as neutral a way as possible (as if you're writing some political script that's watertight to accusations of exaggeration etc.) with management by e-mail, when you're calm, will force them to reply in a measured way that is then a matter of permanent record. You could ask them, politely, to explain certain things or simply "raise a concern". You could then hold them to the details of their replies. If they're like some of the management I've had issues with, though, they can be slippery and avoid committing anything meaningful to writing, deliberately.

Finally, I'd say take it slowly but keep relations with your union decent for the time being - do you have a rep physically working in your area? - because if you can list instances in which you think your ASD or mood issues are working to your disadvantage through management's behaviour, then you should have a case against them. Not to say you'd have to aim to go through some giant, grave process of a tribunal or something, but that if concerns about their actions which could be viewed as discriminatory were formally raised through a union, they may very well back off and discuss making "reasonable adjustments" that they are legally obliged to make.

I hope with time this runs a natural course that doesn't cause you any more stress. Make notes about what management say to you on the days that the conversations happen - keep a careful log that they can't deny. Have a witness as often as possible! When the management gets terrible, just make sure you aren't attached to the place. Keep your options open.

Sounds like quite a situation. Being on the other side of the Atlantic I am not familiar with common work practices, laws and such but a couple of things stick out to me that are more people related.
1. It sounds like a lot of your problems are with the line manager. If her team isn't hitting the numbers that means she isn't hitting her number either. Middle management sucks. That is just the nature of it. It sounds like she lacks the skills to manage people in an effective way. When you came back from holiday did your mates explain to you why they were moved? Was is it a productivity based reason? I would suggest keeping a log book/journal of conversations, what was said, who was present, the context of the situation, etc. If things persist you'll have a record that will show patterns of behavior. Who knows, you might not be the only person having problems with this particular person.
2. As a person I would never allow anyone at work to yell at me. It happened a fee times and that was it. It shows a lack of respect and showcases a true immaturity of the person yelling. ( they typically yell because they don't have any other skills to call upon in that particular situation). I know confrontation can be difficult. I would suggest letting her know in a calm fashion that you are willing to listen to what she has to say but you will not tolerate being yelled at. and if she cannot meet your request then let her know that when she regains her composure you will be more than happy to speak with her like adults with a respectful tone of voice.

I can empathize with your situation. Not everybody is the right person for the job even though it is the job they are given.

3. This may sound a bit crazy... but try and find some common ground with the individuals you are having difficulty with. You mentioned you have a child. That may be a place where you can find common ground. Something non work related though. People put their defenses down when they can talk about themselves or the things they like. (I would imagine you are at ease talking about video games with your co-workers.... same idea) At the end of the day we're all human.

I don't if any of this helps. I just know that I have been in a lot of similar situations and wanted to offer a couple of things that helped me. I hope your situation gets better. Kind Regards. Shark.

I've worked with people like her.

I can only put up with this kind of s**t for a short period, before I blow. What I would do (it's not recommended) is give it back to her with the same kind of agression that she was giving me. I would complain to her about everything, and also complain about her to another "boss".

I can be just as shouty and could make her dread coming into work as she does you.

I can only take so much crap.