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devochka
Tufted Titmouse
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07 Mar 2017, 1:44 pm

I am good friends with two of my coworkers and talk to them a lot, and we even go out for dinner sometimes. Today, they are talking to each other and I am feeling invisible. The other day, one of them also asked me how I am because she hadn't seen me all day. I told her I was at my desk all day, and she could have come up and said hi. I am really upset about this. Does anyone ever feel invisible?



Ban-Dodger
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07 Mar 2017, 3:14 pm

People just get distracted easily and most people in the world do not have long attention-spans.

Sometimes it's better to be able to be invisible because visibility can often draw the wrong kinds of attention from the wrong kinds of people whom it is better to never interact with... I remember, several years back, when someone on here wanted to be more famous or well-known or noticed or something by more people;

How-ever, simultaneously, they also mentioned how they got upset easily. I once did something where I filmed myself performing something, uploaded it one day, resulting in over a couple of million views in less than a year, and that was back then when I had much less experience with social-interactions at the «celebrity» level (and when you're famous you end up with those certain portions of the population who insist on wanting to show off e-peen against you).

I suggest you let it pass as a phenomenon that happens on occasion. Some days, some people will be too distracted by other things going on that shift their attention away from you, but if they are friends or co-workers then that does not necessarily mean that they have unfriended you nor excluded you from their social-interactions.

I have observed human-behaviours for a long time now, the most bizarre things about human-society, and I can tell you for a fact that most people are hypnotised by a variety of things in one way or another, such that they literally cannot remember what they did yesterday, and in many cases even just five minutes ago. Although they do not show such things on television any more, I remember when I used to watch the idiot-box when a program had an episode with a hypnotist, and his snapping of his fingers made all of the main characters suddenly act like animals (monkeys, ducks, chickens, etc), then he snapped his fingers again and they all looked around at each other, wondering why everyone else was acting strangely in some strange pose, then he switched it around to have only one of them be triggered at a time by his hypnotic-trigger (snapping of fingers), followed by snapping them out of their hypnotism. Everyone else saw how the one individual was acting like an animal, but the one who was behaving like an animal, when snapped out of the hypnotism, had no idea what they were doing during the duration of their hypnosis-trigger.

P.S.: I want to adopt you as another imouto-chan. You know you want to be my imouto-chan ! ;)
Alas, I better get back to work, because I am currently responsible for updating someone's web-site.


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Deinonychus
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07 Mar 2017, 3:49 pm

I think what Ban-Dodger said about human nature and short attention spans has a lot of merit.

FWIW, I can relate to the kind of experience you describe. For whatever reason, it's sometimes really difficult to make myself heard in the company of multiple people. I'm not shy, and if anything I'm fairly loud and stereotypically Aspie in my bluntness at times. Still, there seems to be something about my personality that often results in my input being completely ignored when I'm in the company of more than one other person.

Part of it may be that I tend to make comments that other people consider irrelevant to the conversation - even when I think they're highly relevant. Maybe my tone of voice isn't commanding or sufficiently deep. It may be that I don't come across as being all that confident. Whatever the reasons, it can be exasperating. Whenever possible, I prefer to talk one-on-one where my thoughts have a chance of being heard. Oftentimes in groups, I just stop talking when it's clear nobody is listening.

Even on WP, I've noticed that I'm exceptionally talented at killing threads... ;)


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Formally diagnosed with ASD at the age of 43 (2014), I am the author of "Never One of Them: Growing Up With Autism," available through Amazon and most popular ebook sites.

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green0star
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09 Mar 2017, 9:41 am

Heh my whole existence has been me being invisible.



burnt_orange
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09 Mar 2017, 11:15 am

I have become invisible/irrelevant to my own extended family now.