Aspergers and entrepreneurship

Post Reply New Topic

Hello all,

Lately, with rigid thinking and thinking out loud, I have been pondering the idea about why I keep losing friends. I lost a significant buddy and his support circle (due to me being too blunt, wanting attention, etc.) and have been thinking lately about how I might do better having friends for business purposes versus having friends for personal reasons (e.g. a stupid shoulder to cry on, drinking buddies, etc.).

I have been thinking that due to me constantly losing jobs and friends along with my passion for DJing/Producing EDM that I think it's time that ALL the friends I make are for business purposes and that I dump anyone that is not music-related. I have been thinking that successful entrepreneurs should only be friends with people that will help their business as well as they can help the other person's business too.

What do you guys think?

This sounds like a "sour grapes" moment. Business friendships are not very genuine, nor very helpful outside of business. However, their importance might be helping you curb your problematic behaviour. Maybe try remembering that Pink Floyd lyric "Just another sad old man, all alone, dying of cancer" to get more of an interest in keeping other friends. You seem lucky to have enough prospects to waste, but maybe you need to find personal friends you have more in common with to increase the bond.

Dear_one's advice is probs the best advice you're gonna get.

I'd like to add that it's better to have contacts for bits of everything. Social friendships you need because you'll go batty after a while if you don't talk, I'd suggest maybe befriending someone else who is autistic.

For me, I have a contact or friend for everything. I run my own sales business so, never did I think I'd ever need the help of a skilled sewing machinist before but I had that contact to help me out in business and personal related problems.

Fair enough if you don't like people but, having friendship with everyone can help with lots of other things. Now all I have to do on Facebook if I have a problem with my PC is just write a status "PC building folk, I need your help" and I can do thatw ith whatever I need help with or just send a message to someone who I know who can help and give them a bit of money as a reward for doing it, or buy them a drink if I see them out next.

You might have a point. I mean there are 2 "personal" friends that I have that are blunt as f**k. Blunt in telling it like it is. I have recently thought about cutting them out of my life but being that they have helped me and tolerate me, it was hard to cut them. Truth of the matter is, I know I need personal friends but all I can think about is music and people keep telling me I am depressed (I probably am...) and all I can think about is how to make this music interest into profits. It's gotten to a point where I just don't want a social life. It's too overwhelming and if there's no music involved, I start to get bored.

That's true. I really don't like the whole aspect of a social life. Like I prefer going out along or only with another person. I do understand that there is a need for personal friends as I am alone way too often. However, it's been interesting these new "business"/"music" friends that I have been making. Interesting in that I have realized that not only do people need to be business partners in order for me to want to be friends with them but I have to be able to genuinely connect with them on a personal level (80% business and 20% personal BS). It seems like I'm on a hunch but people always misunderstand me for wanting only "music"/"business" friends without realizing that I myself have to connect with folks on a human level 20% of the time.

Overall, I don't like how friendships always has too much vulnerability. Too much of that makes me misbehave (be negative, do things that are not etiquette-like, etc.). I just want to be around folks and behave properly and business and entrepreneurship has been making me think more holistically about my actions.

Maybe you are just getting fully absorbed in your craft. Peter Drucker says that whenever something is really exceptional, it involves a megalomaniac with a vision.

Yeah an AS friend is a good choice. I'm leaning toward that possibility, if I ever have a friend in the future.
If you were to restrict your friendships to business only, you might find that NT's want some more personal interaction as well. Even if it is something simple and fickle as having a drink or chatting about your weekend. You also want a bit of this, which is good.
If you become more aloof, this will be better, most NT socialising is sparse connections where they only see each other occaisionally for specific conversations. It can also include career "networking" which maybe as simple as a coffee catch up on gossip about the former workplace or industry.

As for your dream, it sounds great go for it. With your level of determination I'm sure you will be successful. If you're not depressed stay away from those nay sayers.

I'd love to listen to some of your music if you have a link?

Here's the thing, I've had to disclose to people that I have Aspergers simply for people to understand me. A lot of the time, people start telling me I don't have it, etc. etc. etc. when the point is I'm mentioning it to use it as a tool to do business with others. Also, interaction here and there is fine, just not all too often. I guess if I ask for a favor from someone, I gotta expect an interaction as well. There.