If you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself?

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One of the most stressful parts of my life was finding out about my son's autism diagnosis and then trying to find services.
I received a lot of help from friends and experts, and now I want to put together a website that helps guide other parents through the process of understanding and finding treatments.

I would love any wisdom that you could provide me, that would help a future parent start the journey of understanding and treating autism.
What do you wish you knew?
What would have saved you time or stress?
What mistakes did you make?
What resources were invaluable?
What resource do you wish was available?
What gave you the most trouble?

My vision:
While there are a ton of amazing websites out there, its still hard for a parent to figure out where to start and what resources are available to them.
I want to help them learn to ask the right questions and have the background to make better decisions
It needs to be easier for parents to find local doctors that can diagnose Autism, and find local therapists that can address problem areas

Thank you for your time

You're on the wrong site, sister. We don't treat autism here; we celebrate it. Besides, autism is what a person IS. It's like saying, "I want to treat my son's left handedness" or "I want to treat my girlfriend's Latino-ness because she's from Puerto Rico" or "I want to treat my daughter's gayness." Get the point?

A list of file folders is a thing, and a darn handy one.
Study the gas laws and statistics.
Just because the big people used to make you put your stuff away in the middle of a job all the time is no reason not to put your stuff away when you finish a job, instead of starting the next one on top of the mess. It is OK to get a tool from a rack where you put it away minutes before, even if it feels silly.
Most phonies don't know any other way, and Dunning-Kruger is an epidemic you must not mention to its victims, while politely reserving your own judgement.
Police will always suspect you, even if you call them.

Smoke more weed.

Welcome to Wrong Planet

Wrong Planet does have a section for Autism parents. In that section there are parents that are not autistic and parents who are autistic.

While there are parents of autistics in this section it is mostly about autistics discussing our issues.

More like "I want to treat my son's epilepsy" or "I want to treat my girlfriend's cerebral palsy" or "I want to treat my daughter's multiple sclerosis".

Those are more realistic comparisons to the serious neurological disorder known as autism. If only my intense struggles with my severe neurological and cognitive disabilities were as simple as being left handed. As for celebrating it, #@%& that.

This is where it ends up getting back to real autism vs imaginary autism.

To StellaOzzy, after I was diagnosed my parents had me taken care of by a pediatrician who specializes in treating autistic children. And he in time referred me to neurologist and occupational therapist, who referred me to speech therapist etc. Also through those specialists, I was referred to a special education school for autism. On top of that my parents asked a lot of questions and advice from the specialists and have done a lot of reading about autism. All of this helped me go from being level 3 severely autistic to level 2 moderately autistic, to which I am profoundly grateful.

If you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself?

I would definately use it for financial gain , I give myself insider information on stocks & shares and lottery numbers so I could comfortably live as a recluse.

I would tell myself not to do psychedelics in my teens and to get an autism test as soon as it was invented.

1. Tell myself the lottery numbers and win a lot of money

2. Go back into the future and enjoy my money

We are going to have to have a little chat regarding which lottery you are going to do otherwise there might be some conflict

People will tell you that the afterlife is a wonderful thing until somebody you know goes there, and then they will get upset, and expect you to do the same.
People are not rational. They stretch a veneer of rationality over the sight of emotional decisions and greed.
If your girlfriend has a dream that you are unfaithful, you will be in trouble when she wakes up.
Unlike in the superhero stories, real life villains are not consciously evil, just partly insane. Almost everyone thinks they are fighting the good fight because of some past injury.
A good idea trying to survive on it's own merits is like an abandoned baby. You have to protect it from all the older ideas until it has made lots of friends. Usually, it will lose out to a worse idea with better promotion anyway.
Most of the money spent on cars, and over 99% on pleasure boats, is used to create an image, not provide temporal displacement. Without them, we'd still see rich people in absurdly elaborate clothing.
You will see the world population triple, but people won't understand why there are more disputes between neighbours in the crowding, and try to behave in obsolete ways to fix things. This is a result of the same thought process that copies the appearance of supersonic shapes onto subsonic cars, and put fake wooden peg heads in the Parthenon frescoes - they "look right" because of old familiarity and chance association.
If you ask people about themselves, they are usually happy to talk, and afterwards, they will think they know you better.
Few to none will understand you, but there is hope for having only benign misperceptions to deal with.

If I could go back to being a little boy, I'd tell myself force yourself to eat new things until you like them.

I learned to do this when I got to the age of about 28.

As a child I was a fussy eater and it caused me several issues:

- In P. E. lessons I was mocked for being weak
- I was easy to intimidate and so developed poor self-esteem
- In social situations with friends I had it was a constant source of embarrassment and anxiety that I couldn't eat what they were having
- I didn't reach my full potental in school because all I liked from the school canteen was french fries. That was all I would have. There were better options available but I was terrified of most foods. As a result I was tired.
- Like most fussy eaters I became addicted to junk food like microwavable fries and sugary snacks. The more fussy you are the more likely this will happen. And it made me gain weight and have more mood swings.

It wouldn't have solved all my problems but that's the most obvious piece of advice I would give to a younger man. Eat more, gag your way through it, just do it and you will benefit.

I find if I eat something I hate about 4-5 times I begin to like it. Even within the last 2-3 months I've learned to like salmon, tuna, pomegranate seeds, figs and burgers (yes, believe it or not, I always used to hate burgers!)

Stop trying so hard to act British and just be yourself, even if you parents feel uneasy about the real you at first.

Tell those aliens that abducted me... "hey, any chance I can hitch a ride somewhere to another planet"

Please, please, PLEASE don't use any drugs and stick with your Computer Science major. Get tutoring if you struggle with mistakes and focusing while doing math!! Work hard and don't take shortcuts.

There are some really good posts in the parents section. Some wise souls