Another "I think I'm an aspie"

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Hey. So I was looking through Wikipedia a few days ago and decided to look up autism. That eventually lead me to the unintentional conclusion that I have Asperger's syndrome. I guess I'm looking for some sort of community confirmation so if you should feel so inclined then give me your opinion.

I'm a 25 year old male. I can't stand eye contact or people touching me. I can't stand people trying to help me with something that I would prefer to do myself (especially after they've asked "You need any help with that?" then I say "No, I got it" and then they proceed to come over and try to help. I've snapped at a couple of people for that, which generally gets a confused reaction. A lot of people really need to learn that words have meaning.). I hate sales people that don't understand "I'm just looking around." I hate using the phone. I get some sort of deep uneasy feeling everytime the phone rings so I usually turn it off. I have the same set of friends that I've had since high school and don't really care to make anymore. I think I'm fairly good at a lot of social interraction if I'm prepared for it, but it is generally very draining and I usually don't consider it worth the effort. I would probably have a job if I could deal with the whole interview process. The jobs I had in the past (it's been about one and a half years since my last job) I lost due to poor attendance(although I've always been one of the most competent employees at whatever job I've had). I've made three attempts at college, all of which were short and uncomfortable. I don't know how many times I've been accused of appearing angry or depressed when I wasn't at all. I have practically no set sleeping schedule. I have a lot of trouble sleeping in unfamiliar places (almost impossible if there are unfamiliar people there as well). I prefer to sleep in an enclosed space. I pick and bite at my finger nails. When I've taken my finger nails down to where they meet the skin I peel layers off the top of the nail. I scratch at my nose a lot in public even though it doesn't itch. I like to tap my fingers on things. I step between edge lines of everything. That goes for cracks, tiles, shadows, etc., and even imaginary lines that project out from the edge lines of nearby objects. I've always had a bad problem with understanding what people are saying if there are certain background noises (especially fans, mixers, and vaccuum cleaners). I have always attributed that to the fact that I have straight ear canals and assumed it was something to do with bad acoustics, but after reading about Asperger's I'm starting to question that theory. I'll very often read a sentence of a paragraph multiple times before moving on to the next sentence. I have always excelled at math, especially geometry. I hate memorizing equations and prefer to figure out math problems from the bottom up. I've trained myself to smile more since I've often been accused of appearing angry or depressed when I was neither. I've disturbed some of my friends in the past by sitting in the darkness and appearing to do nothing (I'm just thinking). I pace a lot, usually following the same path of stepping between edge lines. I often rock when I stand. I usually curl my feet under my chair or prop my feet on my chair with one knee pointed up and one pointed sideways when I sit. If I'm at a table I usually set any items I'm using at right angles and between edge lines. I always set the volume of any stereo I'm listening to to any even number (if the volume control is represented by a number). My hygiene is probably questionable. I love animals that move in jerky motions (especially squirrels and jumping spiders). I flip out if my arms are pinned down. I really flip out if I'm forced under water (I've warned people when we go swimming to not dunk me because I may get uncontrollably violent as a result). I've always been bad with names and faces and pretty much attributed that to me not being interested in those people that I can't remember the names or faces of.

I could really go on and on with this...

Any feedback would be appreciated.

I think you have Asperger's. And probably one or two other things too.

Welcome to WrongPlanet, by the way.

*nods* Yep. I wouldn't be surprised if a psychiatrist confirmed your ideas... I'd have said OCD; but then you've got social things and nonverbal communication as well. If you're in need of some sort of official recognition of a disability (school or work), I'd recommend you go to a specialist on PDDs and get yourself an official diagnosis.

Aspies have strengths and weaknesses; what you do is use your strengths to cover your weaknesses. There are a lot of strategies you can use to work around all those annoying parts of life that hinder you in doing what you want to do. Still, AS is really more of a differently wired brain than an actual disorder; so it takes a different sort of learning to adjust to the world with an AS brain.

Welcome to WP.

yip ypu sound aspie to me, you also sound as if you could have other stuff going on there too. could be you have read about it and re-hashed stuff....dotn worry aspies do this too...........but dont take ou word for it..you could just be a mixed up kid looking to fit in and need inclusion in our world........get help...and if your one of us...welcome.

Sounds like Aspergers to me! Congratulations! You finally know what it's called!

We've all got weird stuff here so you'll fit right in. Welcome to Wrong Planet.

What exactly is it that a psychiatrist would do to decide if I have Asperger's or not?
What does official recognition of asperger's do for school or work?

I'm still trying to figure out this strengths and weaknesses thing. As far as standardized testing goes I score very high in all areas (I actually have a copy of the results from my sixth grade Iowa Test of Basic Skills and Cognitive Abilities Test). The CogAT is seperated into quantitative, verbal, and nonverbal and I scored in the top 1% in all three of those, but I was highest in quantitative and lowest in nonverbal. So I get confused when I here about Asperger's being associated with a low nonverbal ability when I have so many similarities (I've spent a lot of the past three days researching it) with aspies and yet score very high on a test for nonverbal ability. As best as I can understand it from the relatively little I've researched it is that NT's have an intuitive (instinctual?) ability to read each others body language and facial expressions and that aspies have to learn those things by object and pattern recognition. What exactly is it that NT's can do that aspies can't other than participate in instinctual social activities? Aren't the NT's kind of slaves to those instincts? How much lack of desire is mistaken for lack of ability? The NT's don't appear any better at reading aspies than the other way around(perhaps less, actually). If aspies were the majority and the social norm then would NT's find themselves feeling "disabled"?

I'd much rather follow logic than instinct even if it may be a slower more difficult route.

Sorry about all the question marks. I might have gotten carried away there.

You set the volume to even numbers too? Neat, I didn't think anyone else did that. Although, I don't mind numbers divisible by 5. Numbers divisible by 8 are my favourite, but prime numbers are the worst! I don't mind stepping on cracks though. But sometimes I make an effort to try and make the same number of steps per crack-interval.

Going by this along with all your other stuff, it sounds like you may be one of us after all. In fact, everything you say about yourself screams out to me that you're an Aspie. So, what are you going to do about it? You should remember that AS isn't anything more than a personality-type, so I would suggest that you don't get too hung up about it. Just realise that there's a bunch of other people out there that have a similar profile to you, with similar strengths and weaknesses. Don't buy into this nonsense about AS being a disease or anything, because it's not. And don't start thinking that everything about you can be attributed to AS, because first and foremost you're a person, not some textbook example of a psychiatric diagnosis. Upon learning of AS, a lot of people seem to do this and start to think about themselves entirely in terms of AS.

I hope that by discovering AS you will find relief in the knowledge that there's a community of people you can identify with, who can validate your experiences.

I think too one of the issues with trying to diagnose adults is that you may have learned "how" to read other people or learned coping skills. Having AS doesn't mean that you can't understand social behavior but that it does not come naturally. I studied people quite a bit and there interactions (still do actually) much like a person would make any kind of scientific observation. Then you notice patterns in behavior, ect. So things like that may reflect how an adult would do on a test for identifying nonverbal behaviors.

I do not have a formal diagnosis of AS but I have a son with HFA and I have been labeled with sensory issues, OCD, depression, chronic depression, anxiety disorder. I have not pursued a formal diagnosis for AS yet either - but I have seen several psychiatrists since I was a kid and did not have alot of positive experiences with them. If you do see a psychiatrist remember that they are not all good - I even left one crying before because he was so verbally bullying because he felt I was non-compliant with meds and things like that. See if you can get a referral for one who specializes in AS.

i think you're just like me!

and I LOVE LOVE how you say "people need to learn that words have meaning" they really do!! !

thats something i would say

Hmm... I think I do just even numbers. I'll have to pay attention to my habits on that more. I've pretty much trained myself to hold my head higher when I walk around outside so I don't get distracted by the cracks as much as I used to. When I first tried to stop stepping over cracks I ended up just stepping on all of them. I make the same number of steps per crack-interval, too. Do you have any unusual indoor walking patterns like for example when walking in front of a couch with three cushions I usually step once in front of the middle of each cushion. I imagine lines projecting out from the space between the cushions. Chairs, tables, cabinets, register vents, etc. all do the same thing along their edges or perpendicular to their seams. I don't have to, but it just kind of stimulates the mind I guess. It doesn't really get in the way of anything. I've never heard anybody else describe doing that and I've done it for as long as I can remember so I'd be really curious to hear of somebody else that does that.

I'm new here. Like, really new. Anyway, I'm pretty sure I "have" Asperger Syndrome (not that I think "it" is a thing to be "had"); mostly because I've compulsively read enough on the subject, but also because I've now been told by two seperate therapists that I have "a lot of characteristics that are consistent with Apserger Syndrome." I recently started the process of getting an "official" diagnosis... but the psychologist who was supposed to test me cancelled my appointment and took a vacation instead.

I'm 22 and have a lot of traits in common with FlyingAnts, though not so much the touching thing and I have finally, after years of trying, learned how to make passable eye contact... sometimes. I've always been kind of the "wierd kid"... the one who can't stop touching his face, talks like he is delivering a lecture to a college class, thinks like an old man, acts like a kid, can't stant authority, stares at the wall for hours (well, I'm thinking... but you would only know because I would be making a face), taps his fingers on everything, always has something in his mouth (do NOT even go there), can't keep up in class (but blows everybody else away on the exams), and has, generally, no idea what you are talking about.

I almost failed kindergarten (well, I actually DID fail kindergarten, but my mother pressured the school district into letting me move on)... and my third grade teacher forced my parents to get my IQ tested because he thought I was ret*d (the results surprised and annoyed him). I've seen about half a dozen shrinks over the years. Everybody thinks I am depressed because I don't have a lot of friends and seem fairly critical of myself (some pretty typical personality disorders were also postulated). I went through involuntary commitment for that. Let me tell you... things like that TOTALLY freak me out... what a trippy, messed up time. I kind of joined the anti-psychiatry movement after that (not that I have read Szasz... and I dislike Tom Cruise) which is why it took me so long to get here.

Oh, yeah, I'm incredibly verbose, too. Rather boring, really. *yawn*

The touching thing isn't something I have any extreem reaction to. I can tolerate it if I have to, but I generaly avoid it as best I can. If it's somebody that I trust a lot then I can have no problem with it whatsoever (depending on the context of the touching). I remember trying to learn to make passable eye contact a few years ago, but I found it even more confusing to talk if I was making eye contact so I just gave up on it.

[quote="unclenutcracker"]...and my third grade teacher forced my parents to get my IQ tested because he thought I was ret*d (the results surprised and annoyed him)...quote]

lol my thrid grade teacher thought i was a ret*d too and made me get an iq test

I guess I do have kind of a limited patience for being touched. That sounds like a good way to describe it.

Heh, the thing about eye contact is that usually, if I'm looking in your eyes, it means I'm not really concentrating as hard on what you are saying. I also have a hard time speaking for myself when looking in somebody's eyes. It's a wierd feeling.

uncle nut cracker...you sound like one of us...welcome to the gang.......as for third grade?
me...i skipped it.
straight to 4th grade....then the trouble started. i peaked to early have been trying to catch up ever since.

I get what you're saying, but no I don't experience anything like that. Well, sometimes I might imagine lines projecting out of things if I'm moving furniture so that it's parallel to the walls, but that's about it and I don't think that's anything special.

About walking along pathways, one thing I do while trying to step the same amount of times per crack-interval is try to make it seem natural. If people are looking at me I won't make it obvious, so I'll break the pattern and take another step or take one less step. But then I'll 'rebalance' things out with the next few tiles. For example, if I had to take two steps instead of the usual three on my left foot, I'll either do the next tile twice with my right foot, or do the tile after that four times with my left foot.

One other thing I do is play this game with myself when I'm on the train, on a bus or in a car. I'll imagine a straight line going out from each side of the vehicle from where I'm sitting, and as streetsigns, pillars, etc, cross over this line I'll clench my toes on the side corresponding to the side where the 'obstacle' is. If that's hard to understand, look at this:

X::::::::::
::::::::::
::::::::::
::::::::::
::::::::::X
::::::::::
::::::::::X
::::::::::
::::::::::
::::^::::
::::::::::

Say the '^' is the car I'm in, which is going up the road. As the 'X's arrive at angles perpindicular to where I am, I'll clench my toes on that side of the car. So in this case, I'd clench my toes in this order: right, right, left. And I can't do both at the same time, so if there's something coming up on both sides I'll have to face a bit off to the side so I can do them one at a time.

This seems pretty elaborate I know, but I've been doing this for as long as I remember - at least since the start of primary school. It's lucky I don't feel the need to do it when I'm driving the car, isn't it?