I like dying my hair... why is that a bad thing?

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Xlandril
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25 Sep 2017, 3:48 pm

Okay, so, I'm male, 30 years old, I live in England, UK.

I enjoy dyeing my hair all sorts of colours... recently, I dyed it GREY, and then I bleached it and dyed it BLUE.. ! !

And now, today, my hair is red... but actually, I'm looking forward to when it will inevitably turn pink~ like, each day my hair will go a little bit 'lighter' (aka, pinker!)

My favorite colour is pink atm, and I'm kinda "excited" by the fact that my hair will be pink, and that contradicts the 'social expectation'

Anyway, my question, sorry about the verbose nature of this post, is this:

My parents said to me that "it's kinda weird for boys to dye their hair..." and that, "pretty much only girls dye their hair" and that's the way it is... apparently..

Why should I feel bad about dying my hair?... I know plenty of girls who dye their hair, and even my parents say it's "normal" to dye their girl hair... but, why is it NOT OKAY to dye my 'MALE' hair? it's exactly the same hair....... :skull: :skull:



I like doing it... and I'm not doing it because I want to look "sexy" or to attract a mate or watever, I just like the way it looks... thats all.... -__-

edit: I just want to say I'm not interested in meeting a female. I'm quite happy going solo atm, as I find children to be tedious.



AquaineBay
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25 Sep 2017, 4:12 pm

Because it doesn't fit society's behavior of males. :roll:

I say if you are fine dyeing your hair then go for it, to each their own! If you like your hair pink, awesome! Wear all pink and be as pink as you can be if you wish! Whip your hair back and forth!(I'm pretty sure you get the point.)

Who cares what society thinks!


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StampySquiddyFan
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25 Sep 2017, 4:20 pm

I don't see anything wrong with it at all! I didn't know it was considered "not okay" in males. You can do whatever you want! :D


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NoNormie
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25 Sep 2017, 4:51 pm

It isn't.



ToughDiamond
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25 Sep 2017, 5:47 pm

It's not a bad thing. Only judgemental types would disapprove. It depends on how much you want to fit into "society" and what kind of job you want to do, if you have to have a job at all.

I didn't ever dye mine, but I grew it very long in the 1960s and 70s. It made it harder to get a job, so I cut it, got a job, and then grew it again. Some bosses didn't like it, but they didn't have the guts to sack me, it was a science job so I was a backroom boy, no customers to upset. Some folks at work didn't like it, they must have thought it was girlie or something. Others were fine with it. I didn't give a damn, it was my choice and they all just had to deal with it. I didn't much like the way conformist people looked but it was up to them. I always figured that if more people refused to obey the stereotype thing, it would be harder to enforce their dress codes and people would have more freedom in ways that don't harm anybody. They say you get on better in life if you conform with the visuals, but I survived well enough.

Basically you pays your money and you takes your choice - individual expression or selling out. I hope you make the right choice, and if it's individual expression, I hope you defeat anybody who tries to make your life difficult for it.



CockneyRebel
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25 Sep 2017, 8:16 pm

I don't see anything wrong with it at all. I used to take turn dying my hair green and blue about 8-10 years ago.


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EverythingAndNothing
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25 Sep 2017, 8:24 pm

I think it's a really old-fashioned opinion. Lots of men dye their hair these days and it's no big deal. There is sometimes a stereotype that men who dye their hair are effeminate, but I think that's less these days than it used to be since its become more normal and alternative styles have become more popular.
I personally think it's awesome when people express their individuality through their style. You should absolutely do what makes you happy.



Last edited by EverythingAndNothing on 25 Sep 2017, 8:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Lunella
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25 Sep 2017, 8:25 pm

I know plenty of guys that dye their hair, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it, it's just your parents being closed minded and deluded by mainstream society. Ignore it and move on because it's very silly of them.


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kraftiekortie
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25 Sep 2017, 8:37 pm

I've thought about dying my gray hair my previous color.

Hair dye does tend to make hair dry, though, and make it "break up."



babybird
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25 Sep 2017, 11:39 pm

Your parents are wrong.


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Ennui0001
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26 Sep 2017, 12:13 am

It's not a bad thing.

Whatever it is, if you like doing it and it's not hurting you or anyone else, imo it's fine.
People have their social and gender norms and they get uncomfortable if anyone roams outside of them. My family has slowly changed the boundaries of what is normal for them because I test their limits, and I don't think anything I've done is at all extreme; just the tattoos, piercings, and hair color that seems to be a defining line between generations. I'm the youngest by a lot and female so anything I did that wasn't standard girly made them adjust their thinking a little.

My husband once pointed out that it was strange that someone with such a need for rules consistently breaks social conventions. I think of social rules as completely ridiculous and different than other rules. There's no logical reason that your hair can't be pink unless it has some detrimental impact on your health or career, therefore (in my thinking) it's a ridiculous social rule that can be ignored.

Coincidentally, I currently have pink hair. :D



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26 Sep 2017, 7:34 am

It's just a stupid stereotype.

It's the 21st Century. People do ALL KINDS of stuff with their hair.

I'm letting mine go gray naturally, and people think that's very weird for a woman to do.

It's on your head, man. Unless they're paying for your time, their opinion matters about a tin fart in a high wind (and in my opinion, if they are paying for your time and have a problem with it, they need to consider getting the stick out of their butts, but paid is paid and that's just life).


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Goth Fairy
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26 Sep 2017, 12:51 pm

I've been dying my hair strange colours since 1996. I have known a few guys in that time who also colour their hair, but they were mostly also goths or associated weirdoes.

I think I have the same experience as you describe, I dye my hair because it makes me feel good, not because of what anyone should think about it. When I had to go back to a natural colour for work, I feel a lot less confident and sometimes even depressed. Then I found another job where I could go back to my silly colours.

You shouldn't feel bad about dying your hair. Your parents are from a different generation where it was more unusual, but these days I see at least three "normal" people a day with hair that is pink, purple or even rainbow - just normal people walking to work or mums on the school run. And sometimes I see "normal" guys with coloured hair too. I think these days it means very little except for a style choice. You can even buy pink or blue hair dye in the supermarket these days!

Also if you want some recommendations of good long-lasting dyes (ie not the ones from the supermarket) or any tips from my 20+ years of experience, feel free to PM me. ;)


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green0star
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28 Sep 2017, 11:58 am

Guys dye their hair, just not as often as women. But again it shouldn't be a problem. Your folks sound like mine who have for most of my life tried to push gender expectations on me.



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14 Oct 2017, 6:39 pm

I know plenty of guys who dye their hair. I don't see how it's seen as a "girl" thing nowadays to dye hair. Male punks have done it for 40 years and nobody questions their sexuality or obedience to gender norms.

I'm rather masculine and don't believe my purple hair makes me any less so.


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starkid
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14 Oct 2017, 7:02 pm

Xlandril wrote:
edit: I just want to say I'm not interested in meeting a female. I'm quite happy going solo atm, as I find children to be tedious.


What does meeting females have to do with children? You can meet adults who don't have children.