Poor social skills may be harmful to health

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Date:
November 6, 2017
Source:
University of Arizona
Summary:
While social skills deficits have long been linked to mental health problems like depression, a new study links poor social skills to poor physical health as well. Those who struggle in social situations experience more stress and loneliness, which can take a toll on the body.


https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2 ... ceDaily%29

Thanks for that post firemonkey. I've been wrestling with how to deal with socializing, since my counselor seemed to think I was being too negative about the issue the last time I saw her. Reading the article you posted from Science Daily, I realize I do have the ability to provide emotional support and to self-disclose, but I'm relatively weak in negative assertion and relationship initiation skills. Those weaknesses have been a thorn in my side for a long time. To some extent I think socialization is more than behaviors and exercising skills: there's also what our minds do with the interactions - it's hard for me to (1) engage in relaxed unstructured chit-chat or (2) to feel support in the way NTs express it, for examples. It's tough to get beyond my deep feelings of alienation and of "otherness" to what I might really be able to experience if I could genuinely be myself. And I have many years of negative experiences and resentments to get over while my autistic memory keeps them always-available in HD technicolor detail. Over the decades I've learned social behaviors, but I do a lot of suppressing of my reactions, including when I feel overwhelmed. The article makes a good point about depression and anxiety - my motivation was better and I more easily coped with challenges and stress when I was working and interacting with others each day. I saw your earlier post about the suggestion of "just walking into a center and interacting" and I relate to the mind-bogglingly great difficulty in that. In the past, I've found that structure can sometimes help in that regard, like in classes or book clubs. I'm trying to find opportunities to have positive interactions now that I'm coming up on not working for two years.

Like you it's definitely negative assertion and especially relationship initiation skills . I haven't got a clue how to initiate social contact with anyone. Then if someone was to approach me there is the issue of sustaining contact and knowing how to be to achieve that without becoming emotionally and mentally stressed and overwhelmed.

Good to see this being recognised.

One additional thing that I didn't see in the article, is that having poor social skills (or anxiety about having poor social skills) makes accessing healthcare so much more difficult for many of us. I have often tolerated injuries and illnesses for great lengths of time simply because I find just getting as far as a consultation with a medical professional so stressful. I find physical discomfort/pain easier to cope with than having to make a telephone call to book an appointment, the hustle and bustle of waiting rooms, strange 'hospital' smells, being poked and prodded by a stranger etc.

And, of course, most medical practitioners are not versed in the ways of autistic folk. How do we know if our sensory differences might influence their ability to make the correct diagnosis? Will we tell them the wrong information because we misinterpreted their questions, or they misinterpreted our answers?