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blooiejagwa
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30 Dec 2017, 3:01 pm

I just came across this term on the Autism Problems Tumblr (this tumblr is recommended in a video i saw right now).

Is this considered an autistic thing?! If so it would explain a lot about me!


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Ashariel
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30 Dec 2017, 3:28 pm

I've never heard it either... What is a Comfort Person?



blooiejagwa
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30 Dec 2017, 4:29 pm

To me it sounded like a baseline person who functions almost like a lesser Personal support worker in some ways


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Piobaire
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30 Dec 2017, 4:56 pm

My mate is my Comfort Person. She continually monitors me (she says she watches the wrinkles on my forehead, and my eyes). When she senses that I'm becoming overstimulated, stressed, upset, overly fatigued, or am just weirding out, she takes me home, or at least somewhere quiet for a break. When we eat out, she sits so the TV is behind me. She does anything she can to make my life easier. I do my best to return the favor.



renaeden
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02 Jan 2018, 7:38 am

Me and my flatmate. We're both autistic and we look after each other, especially when out and about.



EzraS
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02 Jan 2018, 7:57 am

My cousin has always filled that role. He's like having a (non-identical) twin. Same age, raised side by side. He knows and understands everything about me. He has always looked after me.



Trogluddite
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02 Jan 2018, 12:41 pm

If I'm out socialising, I tend to lurk in the shadow of certain friends. It's not so much to have them keep an eye on me, but because I rely on them to make introductions and to get conversation started and keep it flowing. I find meeting a new person much less stressful if I have seen them interact with a close friend first, so that I can get a little bit up to speed with what kind of person I'll be dealing with. I have taken it too far sometimes and been accused of following friends around like a "lost puppy."


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MissChess
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02 Jan 2018, 2:10 pm

DH is my comfort person, to such an extent that we both joke about getting him a vest like the ones service animals wear. He knows me and understands me to a degree that amazes me, and I'd be far less functional outside the home if I didn't have his support to rely on.


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Ashariel
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02 Jan 2018, 2:25 pm

My ex-husband used to 'herd' me in public places, because I don't pay attention where I'm going, have trouble judging when it's safe to cross the street, etc.

These days I have to be more careful, only cross at walk signals, etc., because I lack spatial awareness.



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02 Jan 2018, 3:09 pm

My two best friends, both of whom work in the same office with me, are my "comfort/support" people. They notice the slightest changes in my mood or behaviour, and react to keep me comfortable or help reduce anxiety. They're very protective of me, and watch out for me constantly in social situations. They always know exactly when I need a pressure hug or a break, and help me by reminding me to use my strategies when I'm starting to get anxious or upset. If I have meltdowns, they're the ones who restrain me so I don't hurt myself, and they always stay with me until I calm down.

Two weeks ago when I wandered off and got lost in the city for an hour, they really freaked out, and were on the phone with the cops when I finally found my way back. When I did, they wouldn't stop hugging me and telling me how much I scared them. Since then, the three of us are connected by a phone app, so they can always track my location as long as I have my phone or iPad on me.

I really don't know what I'd do without my friends, and I do my best to let them know that every day.


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blooiejagwa
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03 Jan 2018, 12:41 am

My XH was sort of my comfort person, for a time, however he became emotionally abusive and was always very controlling about basic human rights but I miss and am grateful for that part where he helped me out if I lost keys, helped with other things. Let me talk and It helped me get thru anxiety n helped with things others might think are basic .

I told him everything which felt like the right thing to do and requested his feedback n advice on daily stuff-and still do -but I know now that isn’t smart.

I’m trying to stop.


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Desmilliondetoiles
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03 Jan 2018, 1:56 am

StarTrekker wrote:
My two best friends, both of whom work in the same office with me, are my "comfort/support" people. They notice the slightest changes in my mood or behaviour, and react to keep me comfortable or help reduce anxiety. They're very protective of me, and watch out for me constantly in social situations. They always know exactly when I need a pressure hug or a break, and help me by reminding me to use my strategies when I'm starting to get anxious or upset. If I have meltdowns, they're the ones who restrain me so I don't hurt myself, and they always stay with me until I calm down.

Two weeks ago when I wandered off and got lost in the city for an hour, they really freaked out, and were on the phone with the cops when I finally found my way back. When I did, they wouldn't stop hugging me and telling me how much I scared them. Since then, the three of us are connected by a phone app, so they can always track my location as long as I have my phone or iPad on me.

I really don't know what I'd do without my friends, and I do my best to let them know that every day.



How does one make such good friends? I've tried to be as open as possible with good people but I feel like I've made them and myself feel awkward by the end of it.


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03 Jan 2018, 3:07 am

My Sister and My Cousin's Toddler Son



StarTrekker
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04 Jan 2018, 3:30 pm

Desmilliondetoiles wrote:
StarTrekker wrote:
My two best friends, both of whom work in the same office with me, are my "comfort/support" people. They notice the slightest changes in my mood or behaviour, and react to keep me comfortable or help reduce anxiety. They're very protective of me, and watch out for me constantly in social situations. They always know exactly when I need a pressure hug or a break, and help me by reminding me to use my strategies when I'm starting to get anxious or upset. If I have meltdowns, they're the ones who restrain me so I don't hurt myself, and they always stay with me until I calm down.

Two weeks ago when I wandered off and got lost in the city for an hour, they really freaked out, and were on the phone with the cops when I finally found my way back. When I did, they wouldn't stop hugging me and telling me how much I scared them. Since then, the three of us are connected by a phone app, so they can always track my location as long as I have my phone or iPad on me.

I really don't know what I'd do without my friends, and I do my best to let them know that every day.



How does one make such good friends? I've tried to be as open as possible with good people but I feel like I've made them and myself feel awkward by the end of it.


I got really lucky with my friends. We're all social workers, and they both have a lot of experience from previous jobs working with people with intellectual disabilities and autism. By far they understand me better than anyone I've ever interacted with, including my own family.


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livingwithautism
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04 Jan 2018, 5:55 pm

EzraS wrote:
My cousin has always filled that role. He's like having a (non-identical) twin. Same age, raised side by side. He knows and understands everything about me. He has always looked after me.


I wish I had someone to fill that role. It makes me feel kind of alone at times because all I have is my parents (and my sisters, who have their own lives), which is better than nothing, but I'd really like someone who knows and understands me that well.



Alita
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05 Jan 2018, 3:21 am

My mother is my comfort person. She and I have a telepathic connection. Sometimes she's even called me back 2 minutes after we've hung up the phone because she senses I needed to talk or hear her voice more. Of course, it's not all fun and roses; she's mostly slapping me upside the metaphorical head when I talk rubbish, which is most of the time.


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