Is it ASD or something else?

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I´m going to get a second opinion on my PDD NOS diagnosis as no specific symptoms or difficulties were presented when I got my diagnosis papers. There were no recommendations about work or work environments and no recommendations about what support to seek.

But the diagnosis has still made me feel that perhaps there is something deeply wrong with me and that I won´t be able to work and support myself (I´m currently on welfare) nor that I´ll have a "normal" longing for a partner. At the same time I never experienced symptoms during childhood that made my parents or teachers to suspect a diagnosis. I´m now 37 years old.

I´ve had full time work for some months at a time and the employments have ended naturally when there was no need to hire anyone. I find it hard to imagine how I could cope being "trapped" at work for eight hours a day for a longer period of time but I don´t know if that´s because I haven´t found my niche and that I´ve been partly bored by the work I had earlier or if there is a real impairment that will make it impossible for me to ever find or keep work.

I don´t know if this is "just" depression and/or anxiety or if it´s ASD. I have mental health care contacts but not all know enough about ASD to know or to decide what´s wrong.

Asperger's didn't even exist as a diagnosis until 1994. Assuming that the PDD-NOS that you were diagnosed with is something closer to Asperger's than to classic autism, it probably wasn't recognised either. Assuming this is the case, based on your age, there wouldn't have been anything for your parents or teachers to suspect when you were a child.

I know that in my case, although things were noted when I was a child (eg. my parents mentioned that teachers said I couldn't "see the trees for the forest"), and looking back, I can think of several other issues I had as a child, nobody even considered the possibility that I might have Asperger's. This is likely because Asperger's or other high functioning forms of autism weren't considered to exist. I didn't get my ASD diagnosis until age 36.

Is something "deeply wrong with you"? I guess it depends on how you define "deeply wrong". Clearly, the psychologist who gave you the diagnosis thinks that your brain works differently from how a neurotypical brain works, and that this will make some aspects of your life more difficult than it would be for a neurotypical. Personally, I don't think that means there is something "deeply wrong with you". It's who you are, and most people on this forum have similar difficulties.

Based on what you say, it looks like you have managed to find employment that you are able to do in the past. I'm sorry that you don't have employment now and hope that you will be able to find your niche.