meltdowns? fall asleep/tired or biting meltdowns?

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jaydog
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15 Apr 2008, 9:09 pm

when you are having a melt down, do you bite, violent, hit your head on the wall, or you fall asleep, or non violent. please list either an adult or teen or child (or parent) if you see this thread.

Adult: I Don't, i'm usually very tired, fall asleep, or go into a stone like trance...

what do your child or you do during a meltdown? thought this would be interesting since some of us are adults and some kids..



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15 Apr 2008, 9:14 pm

During a meltdown, I play some videogames or listen to music, then get really tired. I'm a child by the way.



Poeticromance
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15 Apr 2008, 9:17 pm

I would say child since I am 17, depending on where I am. What happens with me is, I throw things and swear like a b***h. Then I fall asleep. During school, no time to sleep, so I scream and yell even longer.



RockyMtnAspieMom
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15 Apr 2008, 10:29 pm

My son, 6, after whining and throwing his arms around and spinning and rolling his head around will hit the floor and go completely limp (with his eyes rolled back in his head) as if someone shot him. He whimpers and says "I can't move, I can't walk"

The dirty looks from people used to bother me so much, now I just laugh. It's kinda funny.

A little deep pressure and some video games will perk that right up! Boing! ...like a plant that was wilting and finally got it's water.

:wink:



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15 Apr 2008, 10:42 pm

College student : still wondering if that qualifies as an adult : age 23

tears held back.... non-vocal.... curl up in a little ball... in the safest place i can find... where hopefully no one will see me..... then tears free fall... breathing panics... until I crash.... blessed sleep...

Now alternate possibility... when not allowed to retreat.... yelling... confrontation... tried to strangle a sibling (I was 14) ... I've hit... scratched... exaggerated flapping of arms/hands...



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15 Apr 2008, 11:12 pm

I usually leave the room as quickly as possible, if possible (sometimes trying to leave would make a situation worse). I usually lie down on my bed and shiver untill I calm down. Reading helps.

If I can't leave for some reason, then I try to detach myself mentally from the situation as much as possible. That usually means ignoring everything and not reacting to anything, (becoming very passive) so it looks like I'm getting sleepy. I tend to be very passive and non-violent because I'm a pretty big guy and I don't want to hurt anyone. I'm like this even if under mild physical threat (like shoving) I don't care because if I'm having a meltdown it's not significantly more painful then what I'm already experiencing.

That's not to say I wouldn't defend myself if I had to. I know I don't have the stamina to last long in a fight, so I'd have to finish it quickly. I think I could become extremely violent if the situation called for it (like something life-threatening), just by turning that negative "energy" outwards instead of inwards. Anger is a choice. I feel nothing but contempt for those who give in to it without good reason.

I guess I count as an adult since I'm a little too old to be a teen, but I don't feel ready for the title.


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AngelUndercover
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16 Apr 2008, 5:02 am

My meltdowns aren't really violent; occasionally I've hit someone during a meltdown, but not often, and never very hard. Mostly I cry.

(I'm an adult... I suppose. I'm 21.)


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MJIthewriter
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16 Apr 2008, 5:16 am

When I was a child I used to throw fits, get into hitting my head (usually against an open door?), or I'd bite up my arms. The worse I felt, the harder the bite. On especially tense moments I could break the skin a little and bring really ugly brusies. Hitting my head with my hands and emitting a loud "EEEEh!" sound was and on more rare occasions still occurs, but only at times of extreme stress.

As an adult: Violent meltdowns are becoming increasingly rare. I still may throw 2 year old tantrums, but those too are rare. I'm beginning to realize that if it is an emotion I can't cope with on my own, I'm best to talk with someone I trust or I post about it in an email or web forum. After all I'm not exempt from so called normal emotions.

I used to falsely believe I could just will them away like a robot. Then I'd get angry and tell myself mentally, "Stop it you stupid!" and other negative comments...All it did was make me angry with myself and the angrier with myself, the worse the meltdown.

Once I truely learned and comprehended that what things I was feeling were normal, it took a lot of stress out of my mind. Sadly it took me? 23 years? Starting at age 2?

BTW I wonder if it's alright if I linked to this topic at AS, simpily because so many parents seem to be dying to know the answer to these questions. It may not help everyone there, but it is my hope that those there with an open mind and truely wanting to understand their child (children) will find this topic very helpful.

To add to this, I'd like to know what emotions race through people's heads when they go through a meltdown, especially if it is a violent one. Triggers would be nice to mention as well.



AngelUndercover
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16 Apr 2008, 5:23 am

MJIthewriter wrote:
To add to this, I'd like to know what emotions race through people's heads when they go through a meltdown, especially if it is a violent one. Triggers would be nice to mention as well.


Mostly what I feel is frustration, at a level that I can't deal with. Also, lots of fear. And whatever it is that set off the meltdown - especially if it's something I'm afraid of - turns into the only important thing in the world; everything else fades into the background.


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bettybarton
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16 Apr 2008, 8:01 am

very occasionally i throw things (mainly le cruset, since its unbreakable- so im clearly not loosing cnotrol tooo much!). or sometimes smash my head against the wall, until i get a headace.
generally- i cry and occasionally scream if im at home, or get so angry i think im going to combust- like im a 1000' hot! if im out i get icy cold with rage and sarcasm, and walk off mutternig insults- which is rude and childish, but does help.
ive tried self harm but it doesnt work for me- it seems pointless and hurts, and does nothing to dissipate the pani or rage or frustration, and i just feel an idiot.
i am 31.



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16 Apr 2008, 8:32 am

jaydog wrote:
when you are having a melt down, do you bite, violent, hit your head on the wall, or you fall asleep, or non violent. please list either an adult or teen or child (or parent) if you see this thread.

Adult: I Don't, i'm usually very tired, fall asleep, or go into a stone like trance...

what do your child or you do during a meltdown? thought this would be interesting since some of us are adults and some kids..

it sounds like could be having what is called a 'shutdown' more so than a 'meltdown' there [its thanks to Danielismyname that found out about that one].


Am have 'violent' meltdowns,am sometimes aware during them but have no vision,othertimes am wont realise anything till its finished and am coming around.
am collapse to floor if am standing,speed rock,head bang,have grand mal seizure like movements and seizing up including inside body,am attack out at everything and anything,am punch head,eyes and ears,bite through flesh,am kick out,when coming out of it,am sleep [apparently it differs for how long],am feel sick for rest of day or can get sick,am can wet self as am dont understand the feel of needing the toilet until its very bad normally but in that state dont feel it at all.
after coming around from the sleep,am feel extremely tired,am do not have outside pain so do not feel injuries,but feel deep vibrating pain in brain [from head banging].
if it had been a long meltdown,am lose the use of legs-can feel touch on them but messages do not get through to them,
am either drag self around by arms or staff help,it can last all day before getting their use back again.
am have a mixture of meltdown and shutdown,and they happen everyday most days as am living in an unsuitable home and area.

Am have always been the same way with meltdowns,apart from losing the use of legs which is a newer side effect.


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18 Jul 2015, 10:29 pm

I'm 24, so I suppose that counts as an adult...

I'm more or less nonviolent, but if it's bad enough I will start throwing things (only if I'm alone). Also, when I was younger I once beat up a friend pretty good during a meltdown, which I'm still pretty ashamed of even though she has long forgiven me. I now try to get away from other people when I'm melting down. I mostly take it out on my piano and I will cry a lot. Then I usually am drained and fall asleep.

These are pretty severe instances, though. I have a lot of milder meltdowns where I just swear a lot and am really frazzled.


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nick007
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18 Jul 2015, 10:54 pm

I yell & curse if I'm around someone who's triggering it. Then I storm off & shortly after I calm down.


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18 Jul 2015, 10:59 pm

I feel angry and use every curse word I can string together.

If I am able to suppress the cursing, I try to dispel the anger by distracting myself by going outside, maybe running an errand, and as soon as I'm able try to reframe whatever happened, understand why I reacted so strongly, and try to self-talk myself into a way of behaving differently next time. It often works, but I have a few triggers that I have been working on for years with only occasional slight success.


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sandrarigel
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26 Jan 2018, 1:05 pm

I basically had less meltdowns since finding out I was autistic.
But I still go into spontaneous burst of crying, and also fall asleep.