A message to parents of autistic children:

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When i was young, before any diagnoses i would chew on my hands, sleeves, people and animals. I would also throw myself to the floor and hit myself. These were my stims. But at the time no one knew that. So i was punished and told to stop and in my teens i somewhat successfully repressed those stims. However after my diagnoses i was told by the internet and my dad to start stimming again to help prevent meltdowns.its hard when my stims are damaging to my body though. My psychologist suggested Chewlery and i looked it up and couldnt afford it of course. So i created my own out of a silicone spatula and cut it out into sonic shape. I had it for 1 day and i now need to replace it already because im chewing to the point of it tearing apart. I am now investing in a real one.


Parents, if you ever want to get rid of your childs stims; dont. Just dont. It it a coping mechanism. And it never really goes away. When my stims were “repressed” i would bite things at random and meltdown more often. However if your childs stims are hurting them then find a alternative. Like i mentioned Chewlery. Its always up to the individual with autism but try everything. Stim shaming isnt okay and repression isnt okay

What if their stims were harming others (you mentioned you chewed on animals and people), causing property damage, causing distress for others because they were loud stims? I think alternatives should be found there too.

Absolutely. Alternitives not repression.

This is an important post. You know how I knew how my daughter's new mainstream school would be right? The first thing the special needs teacher asked what her stims was so that she could ensure EVERYONE knew not to bother her about them and ensure she had the time and space to do them.

That's great to hear.

I'm finding it so hard to find helpful redirections for my six year old daughter. I was only diagnosed recently, and my daughter isn't diagnosed yet but regardless of diagnosis, I tend to think it's not something people do unless they need it. At the moment her main harmless stims are rocking (on her back, side to side), saying made up words over and over (imphimph, imphimph), and she seems to get a lot out of hanging upside down, but then she also has some intrusive behaviours that I don't know how to redirect. E.g. screaming really loudly (I'm extremely sensitive to sound), hitting and just being generally resistant. We've been putting her in her room for some solo time when she's hurting people or screaming, which actually really helps and she's said she likes that (it's not a punishment), but I feel like I'm just constantly redirecting. She's just started primary school last week so I think part of it is that she's processing a lot.

It's hard as someone who was forced to repress my own stims (so I feel very negatively about them, even though I know how important they are) to let go of the feeling that I need to stop her doing everything. Also just knowing what "socially acceptable" behaviours to work towards and what to designate as "other people can learn to get over it".

Sorry for my silly little reply, but that reminds me so much of the word "amphibian". And that makes me wonder if she has any special interests that she could engage in that may be helpful for her. It doesn't have to be amphibians, of course, but may provide an alternate source of comfort or re-direction of her energy.