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ravXVl
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19 May 2018, 1:55 pm

Have you ever spent a lot of time around someone and then found that you started talking and/or acting like them?

Is that empathy?



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19 May 2018, 2:05 pm

Yes, I absolutely do that.

As for whether it's empathy, I don't know. Maybe it could be a form of affective empathy.

Affective empathy (which people with ASD are just as good at as NTs) is about recognising people's emotions and being affected by them yourself. Often, it can result in actually taking on those emotions yourself (you're sad because you're around sad people, you're happy because you're around happy people).

By logical extension, it might make sense that if you're taking on other people's emotions, you might also be taking on their actions or using their words.

What people with ASD are bad at is Cognative empathy, which is about seeing things from other people's perspective. Maybe if you were doing this consciously, it might be more related to cognitive empathy.


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19 May 2018, 5:41 pm

No, I can't say I've done that.

It sounds like mimicking to me though.


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19 May 2018, 7:20 pm

For me, I think it is often "camouflage" more than "empathy". Picking up on other people's accents and mannerisms seems to help me to draw less attention to myself, and I quite often don't notice myself doing it straight away. It does backfire sometimes, though; for example, when someone thinks I'm mocking the way they speak when I pick up on their accent.


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livingwithautism
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19 May 2018, 7:21 pm

ravXVl wrote:
Have you ever spent a lot of time around someone and then found that you started talking and/or acting like them?

Is that empathy?


I don't think so. That's more echolalia/exchopraxia or mirroring.



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20 May 2018, 9:38 pm

ravXVl wrote:
Have you ever spent a lot of time around someone and then found that you started talking and/or acting like them?

Is that empathy?

I definitely have done that! It only happens occasionally with some people I like/admire. I noticed I'd adopted the speech style & laugh of a lady I worked with a while back. I was embarrassed to catch myself doing this and hoped no one else placed the impression.

It's not quite empathy, but could be a similar process of wanting to experience the world from their perspective. This "habit" has made me very aware that I'm composed of little glints of people I've met along the way.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, as the saying goes. So subconscious imitation must be the sincerest form of imitation.



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21 May 2018, 9:52 am

Empathy is a form of a non judgemental compassion and understanding towards other beings.

Like your friend fails a math test which was important to them and is sad. You understand listen to them, maybe try to confort and encourage them that it will work out just fine another time or maybe you even offer them your help to improve.

Thats emathy i guess?



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21 May 2018, 10:02 am

Fay wrote:
Empathy is a form of a non judgemental compassion and understanding towards other beings.

Like your friend fails a math test which was important to them and is sad. You understand listen to them, maybe try to confort and encourage them that it will work out just fine another time or maybe you even offer them your help to improve.

Thats emathy i guess?

I think you've described three different things in that one statement.

1. Recognising that your friend is sad and feeling sorry for them, and wanting to comfort them is Affective empathy, which people with ASD are generally pretty good at.

2. Being able to understand that having failed a math test is a good reason to feel sad and knowing how to comfort them is Cognitive empathy, which people with ASD are generally less good at.

3. Actually doing the comforting is a conscious action; while it's certainly driven by empathy, isn't directly empathy in itself; it's just being a good person. That said, it's certainly far easier to do this if you did #1 and #2 well.


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21 May 2018, 10:31 am

Empathy means the ability to understand and share the feelings of somebody else. You understand what they feel and you also can feel what they feel even if it's not what you are naturally feeling at that moment. You can feel what they feel because they are expressing to you what they are feeling. For example, if my friend tells me she is sad, I also feel the sadness because she is sad. I also understand her sadness as well. That is what empathy is.


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