Is there a way that aspies can learn to lower their voices?

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neptunekh
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27 Jul 2018, 12:52 pm

People tell me all the time I have a loud voice. Could singing help?



Fnord
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27 Jul 2018, 2:09 pm

The most effective way for you to deal with having a loud voice is to shut up.


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orbiter
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27 Jul 2018, 3:10 pm

I have moments when my voice gets louder when I am getting nearer to the main point that I am wanting to say.
It doesn't happen as much as it used to. If I spoke loudly all of the time I would consider singing or perhaps amateur theatre. I found it interesting how many many people with A.S. can feel at home on a stage, mainly because they have learned to act to fit in and so they have had a lot of practice. I have had to learn to shut up as well. When I do shut up I quite enjoy it. There's something fascinating about being in a crowd and deciding not say say anything.



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27 Jul 2018, 4:25 pm

What I find really amazing is the loads of otherwise unavoidable trouble that calmly sipping a generous cup of shut the f**k up saves you.


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Gallia
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27 Jul 2018, 4:32 pm

make everyone else wear ear plugs!


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27 Jul 2018, 4:37 pm

I don't think I talk loudly, but I think it's funny that a characteristic common to Aspies is saying things to people or asking them questions that offend.

Many many of the things that come to mind, were I to say them out loud to someone, I assume would probably offend them even though that's not my intention. I learned long ago that I get in less trouble if I just keep my mouth shut for that reason.


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27 Jul 2018, 4:39 pm

orbiter wrote:
I have moments when my voice gets louder when I am getting nearer to the main point that I am wanting to say.
It doesn't happen as much as it used to. If I spoke loudly all of the time I would consider singing or perhaps amateur theatre. I found it interesting how many many people with A.S. can feel at home on a stage, mainly because they have learned to act to fit in and so they have had a lot of practice. I have had to learn to shut up as well. When I do shut up I quite enjoy it. There's something fascinating about being in a crowd and deciding not say say anything.


Same here. My NT brother hated it and said in an annoying voice "You're piping" when I did this. This angered the sh*t out me.


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29 Jul 2018, 10:13 am

Might wanna get your hearing checked.

In my experience the folks who TALK THE LOUDEST are often the same folks who ask others in the room (whom I had no trouble understanding the first time myself) to repeat what they said.



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29 Jul 2018, 3:39 pm

naturalplastic wrote:
Might wanna get your hearing checked.

In my experience the folks who TALK THE LOUDEST are often the same folks who ask others in the room (whom I had no trouble understanding the first time myself) to repeat what they said.


That could be auditory processing disorder with people like us. I often find that when people say things to me, but I am not expecting them to and am not concentrating on it, that it just comes over as a disordered jumble of noise.


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31 Jul 2018, 7:01 pm

That is funny. People are constantly telling me to speak up and I am constantly telling them to stop yelling. :D


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Wolfboy99
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31 Jul 2018, 8:25 pm

RainbowUnion wrote:
naturalplastic wrote:
Might wanna get your hearing checked.

In my experience the folks who TALK THE LOUDEST are often the same folks who ask others in the room (whom I had no trouble understanding the first time myself) to repeat what they said.


That could be auditory processing disorder with people like us. I often find that when people say things to me, but I am not expecting them to and am not concentrating on it, that it just comes over as a disordered jumble of noise.


My wife has to tell me to speak more softly on a regular basis. That said, my hearing is checked every year and I pass that test without issue.


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RichardJ
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31 Jul 2018, 8:47 pm

I generally talk too loud, if there is a way to stop besides constantly thinking about audio levels, I haven't found it. :lol:


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Last edited by RichardJ on 31 Jul 2018, 8:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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31 Jul 2018, 8:49 pm

Practice...people telling you when your voice is too loud, correcting it, try not to get frustrated.

I think I'm better at this than I was as a teenager, but still not perfect. It takes YEARS.


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31 Jul 2018, 9:01 pm

Fnord wrote:
The most effective way for you to deal with having a loud voice is to shut up.

That's what I do. It's very, very unhealthy =/


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skibum
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31 Jul 2018, 9:24 pm

It might have to do with how you hear yourself in your head. I hear myself very loud so I tend to speak softly. If you hear yourself softly you may not realize how loudly you are speaking. I don't realize how softly I speak. Singing can definitely help if you learn good classical technique. You have to learn techniques like decrescendo poco a poco. That will give you the control.


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