Welp, I had my assessment...

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Yes, yesterday I went back to The Judevine Center for Autism to get the "results" of my assessment.

Reminder: since they had no psychologists, psychiatrists, or neurologists on staff, this is not official but...

I do "exhibit characteristics that are consistent with the diagnosis [of Aspergers Syndrome]."

So, YAY. I have my unofficial diagnosis. And I am currently trying to decide whether I actually want to seek out an official one any time soon. Maybe, maybe not. I am leaning towards "not" currently.

But they had some good suggestions and will try to help me get the help I need in the areas in which I need it. They also said that bringing the report about me to my school learning center would probably allow me to get some accomodations at my uni.

So, I am quite happy and content now. It was as I suspected all along.

nice to hear that, sophist. Where is Judenvine located?

Did they do a MRI? Is that required? What where the results?

It's located in St. Louis, Missouri.



No, there was nothing like that. It was in an interview format and I was taped during the whole thing as well. They gave me the Autralian Scale for Aspergers Syndrome Test and also asked me a lot of questions, etc., about myself. And they also interviewed my mother at the same time in another room, asking questions about me and my development, and gave her the test to answer about me. They said our answers were very similar and matched up quite reliably.

They also gave her a long form/questionaire to take home a fill out about my earlier development which she had to send back to them.



Well, they basically said I appeared to present as Aspergers and obviously my areas of difficulty mainly lie in the social domain. They had recommendations such as seeing an Occupational Therapist who is familiar with Sensory Processing Disorder and also that I receive Social Skills Training, a Vocational Assessment, and also trying to get accomodations at my school.

The one thing that scares me about getting officially assessed is the idea that they may want to interview a parent. I really don't feel comfortable talking to my dad about this yet (my mom is dead so they couldn't ask her anyway)...though he has told me a LOT of stuff about my early development over the years that give me every reason to be convinced I have AS. I have no idea how he would react.

Very good! I am glad for the fact that
you enacted and completed it!
Cool!

Australian Scale? How is this different from
others? What did they ask in this test? IQ rating?
Hmmmmm?



What kind of personal questions did they ask?



Cross comparing answers independently, very good!



How did this come across? What did you say?



Again! What kind of questions? I hope this is not
intrusive of me?



Very good so far! What kind of survey questions?
Multiple choice, limited choices? Scan-tron(#2 pencil
type that is sensitive to erasures)?



So far, so good!




Hmmmm? Now that you are a adult! How do you feel
about this?

How did your mother feel about all this? Why not
your dad? If I remember correctly-your dad and
you don't get along?

Cdt. Sophist
Mgstr. Calculator Infiniti

Sincerely,
Ghosthunter

Last edited by Ghosthunter on 25 Jun 2005, 10:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.

1)...Why are you not sure about a interview
by your dad to them? Is he unaware of your
situation? Are you scarred to tell him because
you think he may not grasp it the way you
would like?

2)...How did your mother die? How old were you?

Sincerely,
Ghosthunter

I'm generally odd about communicating with family members. They seem to misinterpret me often. With my dad, I'm fine when we are talking about THINGS together, or concepts. Emotions and personal issues are more difficult. In a sense, I think my dad already knows I have AS, he just doesn't know what to call it. He consistently points out how I am obsessed with detail and symmetry, how I walk into walls, how I seem quite a bit younger than I am, and how when I was little I did things like reverse pronouns. I suppose I just don't want to have to explain to him WHY I am seeking assessment; really, it is just because I feel the need to confirm my own suspicions with a professional.

However, my dad has a history of trying to delve more deeply into my reasons for things and tends to see emotional content in my statements that simply isn't there. Then we end up arguing and I end up having to think on the spur of the moment, which I'm terrible at. You're very insightful when you say that I'm scared my dad might not grasp my questions and explanations the way I'd like him to. I think that's exactly it.



My mother died of a heart attack when she was 45 years old. I was 22 years old, which means she has been dead for four years since I am 26 now. She lived in another country (England) when she died and she'd moved there when I was 17 years old after my parents divorced. She did not take very good care of herself and I'm fairly certain her heart attack was due to a very poor diet.[/quote]

It's funny how relations are more difficult than
total strangers in the relating one's character!

I have this uncle Roger who has a antique business
since 1970's. I would think my collectible
tendencies would have a common theme, But
no! We are as separate in views as Clinton
is to Bush!




How are you misinterpreted? I personally
can say that my getting misinterpreted
by my family is due to my colorful, and
not to the point wording. I relate in stories
and then the point! I being autistic can
only communicate to how I am and they
as relative as to how they are!

[quote"azalynn"]
my dad, I'm fine when we are talking about THINGS
together, or concepts. Emotions and personal issues
are more difficult. In a sense, I think my dad already
knows I have AS, he just doesn't know what to call it.
[/quote]
So don't be embarrased to have him assist you!
Love in the heart is eternal, especially with one's
own child that they try to express this patience
and love through understanding you(the child to
adult!)



Heh! Heh! how autistic or you and I, you should
see how I organize things like my comics, facts
gathered, ect..... God bless him!

[quote"azalynn"]
how I walk into walls, how I
seem quite a bit younger than I
am, [/quote]

I too have a odd walk and try to be myself
and not offend. My last day at Quizno's was
fumbly at best. I was dropping things as
li Long was rolling her eye's....God bless John
Li Lon for their patience with our autistic
clumbsiness, and bless your dad's sense of
compassion!



I am mistranslating this "reverse Pronouns"
statement! Can you be more specific?



It seems your dad love you and let this
be a team effort for your wellbeing
and his curiosity satisfier! God-Bless!



Like I said make this a team effort
between your curious dad and your
quest to get some facts.....!



Hmmm? This is not a negative hmmmm? but a
I am curious about this in more detail for G.H
Hmmmmm!



Loving and expressing to one's child is no
chocalate pudding! Dad's aren't perfect!
God-Bless him!



Be brave! As a team effort it may help you
understand each other better. Thanks for your
compliment by the way! I follow my instincts!
They are not perfect, but 90% is not bad!



Hmmmmm? Why did they divorce? My mother
Anita was neurotic and my dad was possessive and
oppinionated! I am opinionated and sometimes
way tooo.....organized for my own good. I am
more relaxed about organization now.

What about your folks and how did they work together
or NOT together?



My mother has breast cancer and when her only
son(she has 3 daughters) calls she is still distant
at deaths door! Hmmmmm? parents aren't perfect.

What were your mom's bad habits?

Hmmmmmmm?
Ghosthunter

azalynn, they do not require it. Actually, I offered for my mother to come in and they were glad that she could but that it wasn't absolutely necessary. If you prefer an assessment, merely say no relatives were willing to come.

_________________________________

Ghosthunter, here is a link to an online version of the Australian Scale for Asperger's Syndrome:
http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/asp ... twood.html




They asked stuff about my daily life, what things I do, what I'm interested in, how many friends I have. The interview really went all over the place and I was really too nervous to remember anything but visual stuff. Auditory memory has gone right out the window.



Humz. Well, being that they asked my mom, I'm not quite sure.



Well, I was refering to my mother also having taken the Australian Scale for Asperger's Syndrome in regards to me. They said we answered pretty much the same things throughout the test.



I'm not too sure. I never got to see the questionaire. I do believe it was limited-choice questions for the most part, but I'd have to ask my mother about that...



I feel much more at ease, just knowing for sure.



My mother didn't seemed surprised at all either. I think we both just knew before we ever went there.

My dad on the other hand, being that he is no longer alive, I don't know how he would react. He would either politely listen but not put too much energy into it, or find interest in that he was almost definitely Aspergers, too.

When I say "reverse pronouns" I mean that I would often say "you" when I meant "I". If I wanted a drink of water I'd say, "Do you want a drink of water?" I've heard that this is a common phenomenon when people with ASDs learn to speak.

As for my dad...well, I am fairly certain he only wants the best for me. He did have a lot of good rules when I was growing up, such as, "Do not say anything you cannot justify". This taught me not to say things unless I had good, verifiable reasons. However, sometimes what is verifiable to one person might not be so to another, but overall it is a good strategy!

However, my dad sometimes tended to not accept my explanations for things. When I wanted to go back to my college town a week early at the end of the summer rather than stay with the family and go back right when school was starting he did not understand my need for a readjustment period. I didn't want to just spend the summer at home and then go right back to school without having any days to unpack and readjust to the environment. He kept thinking I had secret hidden plans but really I just wanted to have a week of alone-time and thinking time. In my alone-time and thinking-time I just tend to think and read and use the computer and wander about. It's important to me but my dad thought it meant I was just avoiding my family.

Nevertheless, I think at some point I should discuss my AS issues and discoveries with him. It's just a matter of finding the proper time and setting to bring up the subject. He is very busy. I'll speak of it when I am ready.

My parents divorced because they could not live together. My mother could not keep promises, lied compulsively, etc. She had severe depression and psychotic episodes. Her leaving was actually the kindest thing she ever did for us. It might sound horrid for me to say that but I really do think she knew on some level that her presence was de-stabilizing the lives of her children. Either that or I'm extrapolating backwards because that is what happened when she left: things got better. When she died it was as if a stranger had died. Not all families have strong bonds in the expected places; I don't think I ever had a strong bond with my mother, but I am not traumatized by it. Things happen, and as you say, people are not perfect.

I am HFA and I completely understand. At say 38
my friend at the former hostel I was working would
say get me a six pack of beer and hand me some
cash to retrieve it. I would arrive with it and
say "Here's your bottle(singular) of beer". This
is a very common learning disability trait in "the
non-verbal to verbal retraining level". Are you HFA?



Sound advice! He must love you alot!



Parents are still people and imperfect! Just
remember he loves you and god-bless him!



I understand, and in time he might? Being
autistic does have it's bad points! Especially
the re-adjusting and phase by phase planning!



Have you and him ever seen eye-to-eye on some
things, being that he is human and imperfect like
everyone else? I am imperfect, so are you, your
neighbor, ect.....! But there are points where
people actually can see eye-to-eye!



From how you write and what you say! HFA is more
like it! Maybe PDD-Nos! AS is a walking genius,
HFA'rs have had specific learning delays in the same
age group that AS'rs were walking geniuses!
This is just from my readings, own experience
and observations of the people on this site!
Hmmmmmmm?



AWSOME!



Sound like my mom!, that is the part of
"if she dies she was like a stranger!"

Sad but true! Sorry for being negative!
Sigh!




Good luck and God-Bless!
Ghosthunter

Like you, I have an unofficial diagnosis - from an audiologist who knew what he was talking about and obviously comes across a lot of people with sensory processing problems in his line of work.

It took me a long time to assimilate and understand what he had told me, but after a period of denial I did enough research to confirm to myself that what he had told me was correct.

I have decided not to take it any further. I am in my mid 30s - I got through school and got a degree studying part-time later in life without even knowing what AS was, let alone having any adjustments. Yes, I have a long history of employment problems, but knowing myself is enough - I now know more about the type of jobs I could excel at. I don't need an 'official' diagnosis to confirm it.

My other issue, and the deciding factor, is this - I do not want it on my medical records. Discrimination is rife among employers. It doesn't make much difference that disability discrimination is illegal, because if someone doesn't want to employ you because of a perceived disability or difference, then they will find a legal excuse not to, or employ you and make your life hell until you leave. I have had problems at work, but I also know others who worked in the same place who were diagnosed AS, but they were still bullied by their managers, and in some cases sacked or forced to leave. Having a diagnosis does not necessarily make your working life easier - in fact I firmly believe it can make it more difficult.

I have decided that I will muddle through, as I have done up until now - having an official diagnosis will not make my life any easier, and may in fact be counterproductive. Just my opinion.

Very Good! I wish you good luck and best wishes.

Congrats on your unofficial dx, Sophist. I hope their suggestions work out for you in daily life.

I have an unofficial diagnosis. From me.
I have no doubts. Suits me at this point.

Hmmmmm? What did he tell you that was correct?



What is your college degree in? Is it one that plays
your strengths? or weakness? I ask this since
you said you weren't aware of your AS until
afterwards. If you had awareness before the
degree you would have naturally have played
your strength!



Aren't coping and moderating skills cool!
I will assume you did it without med? If
so you are like me, Self-Awareness and
subtle adjustments along the way!

Cool! and by the way being 39, I learned
later in life of my HFA. Autism is autism,
but it is nice to know coping skills and
subtle adjustments work!





Here's to awareness!

I had a string of jobs from 18-34 and all I can
say is they were inappropriate food, people
contact and abusive-annoying jobs that mostly
brought out my worst.


1984-1995, Mostly part-tiime food!
1996-2000, Bookstores, market research, and
temporary agencies, computer re-sellers!
2000-2005, Dishwashing 2.5 years, Quizno's 9 months
and hostel 2.5 years and the most stablist of my job
outlook.

$500-$5000 per year from 1984-1998 and mostly homeless
and employed!

$10,000-$12,000 per year between 1998-2002 and
occasionally homeless!

$5000 or less 2002 to 2005 and house in a abusive
hostel situation! otherwise would have been homeless~!

What about you many jobs?



This applies to Mac Tech International and Fry's Electronics.
They both suspected something wrong and made life hell,
but I did learn about computers!




Hmmmm? I am aware and had a childhood record!
I don't feel a adult diagnoses is neccessary, except
I am curious what a professional would say! Being
40 in 1.5 years makes me curious since my life has
be f****d with homelessness and damned if I do
and damned if I don't. I just want my final 30-40 years
to be as enjoyable as possible!

Are you just a itsy-bitsy curious?



Again, What kind of jobs and incomes did you make.
I am becoming more aware of the "almost always
homeless issues" that others have implied in the autism
spectrum, employed or not! Just curious!

Sincerely,
Ghosthunter

That my hearing was good (I suspected deafness) but that my problems were due to processing problems, probably caused by Asperger's or similar. My research confirmed Asperger's, the criteria fit me perfectly. Definitely not HFA as my early verbal and reading skills development was advanced rather than delayed.



Archaeology - one of my obsessions! I did it purely out of interest and self-improvement as it is nearly impossible to get a job doing it - but I knew already that if I wasn't 100% interested in a subject I would not be able to finish the 4 years of study!



Even before I was told about Asperger's I knew that I had areas of extreme strengths and weaknesses and worked around them as much as possible. In that sense, I made my own adjustments in my working practices.



My first job was a summer job working in a tannery laboratory matching dye mixes to make up customers' orders which I quite enjoyed. I left to go to sixth-form college (age 16-18 in the UK, non-compulsory further education).

Then I did a couple of retail jobs which I hated, this was while I was at college. Because I shuffle my feet when I walk and they had a synthetic carpet, I used to give the customers electric shocks when handing them their change! I memorised all the product and department codes so I was not bad at my job, but having to make small-talk with large numbers of people was stressful.

Then after I finished sixth-form college I went to work in the Civil Service (clerical work in government offices). I was there for 13 years, but was moved from one section to another, again and again, because I kept messing up. I came close to being fired so many times I lost count. My last post there was horrendous, my manager bullied me even more than previous managers, and I resigned on the day of my hearing which was to decide whether I would be fired. I was told not to work my notice period, just clear my desk and go.

Then for the last 3 years I have spent most of it unemployed, was homeless for one period, and have had a number of temporary jobs. The one I enjoyed most was cataloguing artefacts for a university archaeology department, but it was only funded for 3 months and when the funding ran out I had to leave. I excelled at the work and loved working in the basement storerooms cataloguing ancient artefacts. I am currently working on a temporary part-time basis for a small charity which doesn't provide any intellectual challenge for me, but I can be myself and no-one's going to look at me strangely.



Exactly. I have been bullied horribly at previous workplaces, just as I was bullied horribly at school. I don't believe that a diagnosis would have changed that one bit. I have coped so far, and I will continue to do so.



Curious? I think so, yes. Curious to see what is going on in my brain in a scientific sense! In scientific terms to learn more about why I think and sense the way I do. But then this is an area in which science is still largely ignorant and attempting to understand.



I gave a quick summary of my jobs above, income has always been low. I have been homeless for a short period of time, returned to live with my parents for a while, spent quite a long time unemployed, and while working been unable to cope with the stress of full-time employment. At least I know now that this is not due to laziness or stupidity.