A ? about articulacy and social communication

Page 1 of 1 [ 12 posts ] 

firemonkey
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Mar 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,748
Location: Calne,England

02 May 2019, 5:02 am

Can you be articulate and still have quite bad social communication problems?



EzraS
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Sep 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,828
Location: Twin Peaks

02 May 2019, 5:11 am

I suppose that depends on what one is articulating. Someone could be very articulate about a special interest that is of no interest to whom they're socializing with. Or is annoying or offensive etc.



firemonkey
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Mar 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,748
Location: Calne,England

02 May 2019, 5:50 am

I know when communicating on a personal level I don't always find it easy to know what to reply with. I've learnt to a small degree that x response may be the expected one to y comment.
It maybe comes over as a bit formulaic / stilted. I don't know for sure.



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 70
Gender: Male
Posts: 35,189
Location: temperate zone

02 May 2019, 5:54 am

You can have a big vocabulary, and be free of speech impediments, but still be inept at "social communication". So yes. If that's what you are asking.



firemonkey
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Mar 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,748
Location: Calne,England

02 May 2019, 6:07 am

Yes, that was what I was asking. It was just hard to make a clearer title with the limitation on number of characters that can be used. I have a high verbal intelligence but really struggle socially. I wonder though how much of that poor social communication is down to non- verbal deficits. My non-verbal intelligence is most probably in the the 'borderline intellectual functioning' category.



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 70
Gender: Male
Posts: 35,189
Location: temperate zone

02 May 2019, 6:13 am

firemonkey wrote:
Yes, that was what I was asking. It was just hard to make a clearer title with the limitation on number of characters that can be used. I have a high verbal intelligence but really struggle socially. I wonder though how much of that poor social communication is down to non- verbal deficits. My non-verbal intelligence is most probably in the the 'borderline intellectual functioning' category.


In my experience when folks use the phrase"Nonverbal intelligence" they are usually talking about your abilities with spatial relationships, math, and mechanical aptitudes. How well you can drive a race car around a curve, or how well can fix a race car. Not much to do with your talents in the social realm.

Social communication has to do with your ability to get into the other person's head, and see things from their pov, and then to speak to them in their terms, and be an effect diplomat, or salesmen. Emotional intelligence. And the like.



firemonkey
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Mar 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,748
Location: Calne,England

02 May 2019, 7:02 am

Quote:
One facet of nonverbal intelligence is emotional intelligence (EI).

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6146225/


"Should social savvy equal good spatial skills? The interaction of social skills with spatial perspective taking."

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21787102



Trueno
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2017
Age: 69
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,788
Location: UK

02 May 2019, 7:21 am

naturalplastic wrote:
You can have a big vocabulary, and be free of speech impediments, but still be inept at "social communication". So yes. If that's what you are asking.


I feel that is describing me... so double yes.


_________________
Steve J

Unkind tongue, right ill hast thou me rendered
For such desert to do me wreak and shame


shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,377

02 May 2019, 10:06 am

For social communication, you don't need to be that articulate,

"Most people" have teaspoon size thoughts and teaspoon vocab

While I have gallon size thoughts and punt size vocab

"Actions speak louder than words "

"Most people", (I feel) talk too much and too loudly and there are too many of them


If they like it they say "cool"

If they don't like it "why?", As if there is a good reason. They act like they are receptive but they are closeminded

"Unfortunate"

"n****r" if the don't like your perceived social socioeconomic class

"fa***t" if they think you are gay or trans or crossdressing or not adhering to gender norms.



Most precious lil "people" act like every thought and emotion that goes through their head is the latest greatest scientific invention


Enthusiasm is not always a good thing


Then when you say the slightest thing, they grunt "huh" and "what", like it's the etiquette equivalent of "excuse me"


They call themselves "people" , but there is just one of them and one of me. They successfully tried to overpower me, by outnumbering me



Judgmental

Arrogant


Manipulate


They act like everything is funny, if they like it


"Most people" act like they have never done anything wrong before in their lives and "the meaning of life is helping people!"


Morally innocent lil attitude



They are simpletons and socially adept because there are too many of them


They had the nerve to tell me that "we care about you", but they (singular and plural) don't treat you like they treat their "awesome friends"



:roll:





They wait until they know you are ok and ask "are you ok?" Because then you have to say "thank you" but those ass holes haven't "helped " you




They know they don't have the skill or authority to "help" you


They act like they are doing you a big favor, but they are "hurting" you or annoying you.


For example, "you want me to call you ("your boys name")?". "Ok". That is not a personal favor,. Equal employment opportunity commission 2012 gender identity. "Discrimination" . Homophobia


:roll:



"Most people" completely miss the point


They act like they truly believe that they are perfect



They don't need to be articulate, smart, nice, or anything like that



They just need to be normal


And they have a lot of friends



Trogluddite
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2016
Age: 54
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,075
Location: Yorkshire, UK

02 May 2019, 10:53 am

My responses to social communication are often "cut and paste" jobs - sound-bites that I have learned over time are socially acceptable for the situation. They can maybe even sound quite erudite superficially, but some people do notice that my responses are often very stereotyped; the same little phrases popping up repeatedly as "stock answers" to any query.

But "acceptable" and "erudite" aren't the same thing as expressing what I truly think or feel, and I can rarely admit that I often have no idea what I truly think or feel in the moment. This is possibly why I have always "collected" figures of speech, and litter my speech and writing with them - they fill the empty space where my true reflections would otherwise be. I'm aware that it can often make me come across as aloof or flippant, or even uncaring, or dismissive of other people's concerns for me (I'm always "OK, fine, alright" because I struggle to express anything other than that, even when I realise that others' have justifiable concerns.)

I've worked as a technical writer, and seem to be quite good at passing on my technical knowledge on help forums and as a mentor. My functional language skills seem fine, if a little eccentric and stereotyped sometimes. But there's not much use knowing how to express things when I've often so little idea what I want to express.


_________________
When you are fighting an invisible monster, first throw a bucket of paint over it.


dyadiccounterpoint
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 31 Jan 2019
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 464
Location: Nashville

02 May 2019, 11:52 am

I have a history related job giving oral presentations of an informational nature and I'm quite good at it. I regulate my accent, speed and tone, body gestures, etc. They are my captive audience and I rather enjoy giving rehearsed scripts. I often am asked if I have a theater background or am an actor. I've also seemed to have traded my native accent for a northeastern, cosmopolitan one.

It's everything else that's an issue for me. Giving one sided presentations is far less complex than navigating an improvisational social situation. Those little moments where someone socially stimulates you and it's clear you're not innately producing the correct reaction, they stick out over time.

I can play a role in bursts (like in an interview or similarly critical, but short moment) because I've worked very hard to learn how, but it all collapses under a prolonged inspection.


_________________
We seldom realize, for example, that our most private thoughts and emotions are not actually our own. For we think in terms of languages and images which we did not invent, but which were given to us by our society - Alan Watts


shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,377

02 May 2019, 6:45 pm

Articulation has a small role in social communication

Verbal communication versus nonverbal

Even if you articulated a statement perfectly, you get nowhere if you articulate it to the closeminded idiots



For example, I tried to articulate transsexuality to mister redelings. And the penis was closeminded



Even if I were to have given the perfect explanation, the penis still would have been homophobic


Not receptive