A specific type of bullying -- anyone else experienced this?

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Hi all,

So I'm wondering if anyone has experienced this type of bullying before.

People with usually do this thing to me where they will seem to "slight" me on purpose, for example, once when I was at the bowling alley with two friends, we all got this strike but one of the members there who apparently thinks I'm weird, only "awarded" it to two of my friends whilst completely ignoring me/refusing to look at me on purpose.

Or a few of my family members are complete dicks to me for no reason, I thought at first I was just imagining it, but actually I think I may be getting quietly bullied by half my family if you can believe that! Or doing something like shaking everyone's hand at a family gathering but refusing to shake mine.

Other examples of what one/two family members do to me:
- Criticizes everything I do, especially when no one else is around
- Talks down to me
- Ignores me
- Laughing at me once or twice, and quietly belittling me.
- Going on and on at me every time I see them about being on the dole
- Other random comments that are disguised to put me down/make me look stupid

Am I overreacting to this or am I really being bullied by half my family?

And also, have any of you experienced this sort of "slighting" or bullying before in general? I'm naturally hypersensitive/thin-skinned, and I would hate the thought that people somehow knew about this and used it against me as a way to 'torment' me psychologically, like they get some sick satisfaction from it or something which is really f****d up actually. And like I said there's usually no one around me to see this half the time so it's not like they're gonna believe me when I tell them

I remember reading online somewhere that, due to the fact that some people with an ASD have low-self esteem, they are emotionally vulnerable/hypersensitive, and bullies may actually pick up on this and, I quote, "use their emotional vulnerability against them".

Fukking a**holes man.

Some of those examples, especially the ones involving strangers or people you don't see often, could be people behaving awkwardly/avoiding you because your behavior or body language is unusual and unsettles them. Kind of like how people, because they don't want to "stare" at the lady in a wheelchair, will never look at her at all.

But your family saying mean things to you doesn't sound kind, or accidental. They maaaay be trying to joke with you, but if you don't find it funny then they should stop. Maybe avoid those people as much as you can, or ask a nice family member to help you with the situation (ask them in private, not in front of everyone).

I have definitely experienced this. Nobody really treats me badly but I have noticed I have no real skills that will help me thrive in this modern, technological era. Sometimes I get so depressed about it that I feel worthless. It is really my own ignorance, rather than anything someone would say about me, that's getting me down. I hope to remedy this problem soon. I just hope I'm not too old to learn new things.

That was my family in a nutshell.....usually overt in the old days....more often covert these days.

I know exactly what you are talking about. Something unkind will get said, but then the conversation goes on as if nothing is out of the ordinary. For example (true story):

My mom: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Me: "A scientist I think"
My mom: "Oh honey, you're not smart enough. -What else do you want to be?"

You are smart enough. Think along these lines. Some people are very talented at passing exams which are based on learning what other people have come out with... So in other words the ones passing exams may have excellent short as long term memories, but may not actually be that good at thinking for themselves. I know of a few like this who often make ideal teachers or lecturers as they are able to take subjects and read and remember all they read... It is not necessarily related to the level of intelligence.
A family relation on my mums side has a photographic memory. She can basically pass exams without any problems for most subjects as most subjects required one to recall information which she was naturally talented at.

I have a friend who I see about once a year as he lives in Ireland which is across the sea from here. Now he can remember most of what I say as jokes. Little funny sayings I make up on the spur of the moment. I am good at doing this, but he can't seem to do it himself somehow. Yet while I have long forgotten what I have said, he can remember nearly all of them and there are thousands that I have said over the years.

So go ahead and be a scientist. You don't have to show exams. Just be one. If it is your interest, go for it. Find yourself a special area which you enjoy in the subject.
I am a railway modeller. I enjoy model railways. I didn't have to pass exams or have my efforts displayed all over the railway modelling magazines to declare myself as a railway modeller. I don't have to be that good at it either. I just have to enjoy and be to call myself a railway modeller. And I actually build things. Well over half those who call themselves railway modellers simply buy everything and place ready made products on their train boards and enjoy the hobby and call themselves railway modellers, and though I know that this isn't really railway modelling I still want to encourage them as they are enjoying what they do and are having fun. So why not? Why not call yourself a scientist and experiment in an area which you enjoy. Learn through experimenting. And remember. Many of the early scientists who made great discoveries didn't have qualifications either! They just had a love and a passion for the subject.

Fern is a scientist.

Good. I didn't know this.

She said screw the naysayers.

I have learnt in life to do my own thing my own way. It is the only way to get real satisfaction.

That’s true....but one should adapt at least somewhat to the general society as well.

Especially if it’s not economically feasible to not have a job.

At the moment I am rather stuck jobwize. I don't know if I could cope with the stress so I have no income. However my mum and I do work together well. We live in a rural area so no public transport. She does not drive. I drive her and she feeds me. It is how we are both able to live here. None of us could live in a town as we are not towns people. We would be so depressed.

That’s cool. Sounds like you have a good thing going.

And you can hang with the trains all day

I am hoping to move area with my Mum for a fresh start. This way I hope to be inspired again so I will begin to cope better. I find I have stagnated here. It is a lovely area but I have outgrown it. For example, I rarely want to go cycling anymore so I don't. If I relocate I will love to want to go cycling to explore the area, even if I am stuck with energy loss and need to "Limp" back home on low power mode after I have recovered. The newness and adventure spurrs me on.

I would love to permanently stay in your area.

I don’t like change...especially if it’s a change from something nice.