Would an Aspie typically miss the hint in this situation?

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I seem to have this instinct where I usually can get hints in what people are saying, when emotions are involved. That's one of the reasons I question my diagnosis, but there are other Aspie traits I do have, so I can't really say my diagnosis is wrong (as much as I wish I could).

Anyway, here goes. My boyfriend is having trouble with his teenage son (this son lives with my boyfriend's ex-wife), and when he showed me the strange texts his son has sent him, he said that he wants to see his son at the weekend to sort things out and find out what's going on in his head. We actually had planned on him taking me to my mother's house this weekend, so without me saying anything, he added, "but I can still take you to your mother's in the evening after I have seen my son." But I imagined how stressed he must be feeling about his son, so I said, "you needn't worry about taking me to my mother's, I can always take the bus, it is not a problem." And he said, "oh, would you? Because that will be great, then it will save me from having to rush about and I can spend more time with my son." So not only I totally understood how worried he is about his son and was anxious to see him at the weekend, I also figured out that when he was suggesting he still take me to my mother's, he was really meaning the opposite and wanting me to say "no, don't worry, I can take the bus", which I did say without having to think. Even if there wasn't another possible way to get to my mother's, I still would have said something like, "I will see my mother next weekend then, so that you can see your son."

Would a normal Aspie have not got the hint in this situation? This might be similar to the woman at the ER situation discussed in a recent thread here, except that neither of us were being sarcastic or mad. Can an Aspie have this social skill? Or am I an unusual Aspie?

I would pick up the hint. Your boyfriend sounds nice.

I think this is more about being courteous and thinking about him so so to make it easier on him, you decided to take the bus to take the stress off him.

That woman in the ER story told him he could go and he even asked her if she would be mad and she said she didn't care. Apples and oranges here. If you had asked him "Shall I take the bus instead so you wouldn't have to worry about taking me?" and he goes "No no, I will take you" and you go "Okay, are you sure and this won't be too much?" and he goes "Yeah I don't care" and you went along with it, that would be apples and apples of he got mad at you about it.

If he added the bit about still being able to take you as more of a hurried afterthought, I would probably have picked up on it, but otherwise I might have missed it. But either way, I would probably realize that given the situation, he would probably prefer to have more time with his son, and I would probably ask if he was sure that was all right because I could take a bus or go next weekend instead if he preferred. It's another situation where I may or may not get the hint, but I would double check to make sure it was all right and then he'd have the opportunity to say it would be better to take one of the alternatives.

I know I would have missed the hint

That's the kind of situation that could go either way for me. I might just be considerate and say 'you don't have to' understanding on an intellectual level but not reading the hint. I might not pick it up at all, or I might get it.
It depends one the people involved, how much attention I pay, and probably just how I was that day and right then.
It has happened plenty of times that I've had some sort of interaction and afterwards I have replayed it, sometimes much later, and then I interpreted some hint I picked up at the time subconsciously but didn't consciously see then. I've even seen old memories in new light as things I saw but gave no thought has a social meaning that passed me by first time around, maybe because I don't look for it, being of a solitary nature and preoccupied with other things.

Dad needed some alone time with his son.

Joe was able to see that.

This benefited everyone.

I had close friendships with some NT's who would tell me they were just offering out of politeness and I shouldn't have accepted. Also they would tell me when I had accepted something from another person when they didn't want me to accept.
I just learnt to be as self reliant as possible to not upset anyone or put anyone out.

The NT's didn't know about autism but saw I was a well meaning person who was being a bit clueless.

When I was younger I would have a discussion with aspie friends who was going to get the bus etc. It was all worked out for the best with no one doing that polite offer thing. I preferred that way of doing things. It was just like,OK we meet at the cinema,oh what about this cinema its closer! OK that one then.

I think I'd have asked questions to find out what was best for both of us. I wouldn't have liked the change but I might have suggested it if I thought it helpful. I don't think I'd have seen it as a hint, but I'd have seen the possibility that he was being nicer about it than he really wanted to be, and looked into it more closely. It depends who you're dealing with. Some cultures tend to be over-generous in the hope of reciprocation, others tend to just say what they want. I think I prefer the latter. It's simpler. But it might not be as common, and it might be hard to teach somebody to be more straight up about things if they've never done it that way since they were young kids.