A fear of my mild case getting worse, self-absorption

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This is aimed at adults with pdd-nos, you know people with traits of it, for instance acting aloof when uncomfortable or spending more time in your own head than in the company of others. I have these moments, which I don't really consider a problem where I will lose interest in others and drift away into my own head or world. Sometimes I fear it will get it worse, and it'll become more severe . To be fair I'm kind of self-absorbed as well and prefer my own company anyway so that would probably explain a lot.

You know when you're alone you lose interest in talking to others in a genuinely interested sort of way, as in the post title I have some (covert) narcissism going on as well and a lot of the time, I, as bad as this sounds, have no interest in the lives of others just my own. Yeah really, and wondering if anyone here relates? I'm still empathetic though. I mean a lot of people are like this, you know looking down playing on their phones ignoring others, total loners. Gotta snap out of it I can easily get to a very self-absorbed state, added by pdd-nos where I will get completely absorbed in my own head and become very insular... some people can even tell your doing it because it looks like your distracted with something internal.

Thing is, after some thinking lately, I realized this is becoming a problem. It's gotten to the point that for most of my life now I've been like this and honestly been a pretty crappy friend to others because of that.

So, wondering if anyone relates, what to do about it and how to stop it from getting worse.

Undiagnosed. If I don't have aspergers (masked) then I have PDD for sure. I don't have friends, I know people.
I'm glad you realize what you do affects others. I'm just realizing this these last few years, more lack of foresight though, not narcissism. I just never really thought much about it. I've been wondering lately if I've been a pretty crappy parent. Providing all the basics and education, being reliable, but never "being there" - I offer solutions. My kids only bring problems to me that need a solution, or an objective opinion. With other family I'm learning now to just shut up and listen and I'm getting better at it. Other people's problems don't necessarily resonate with me but at least I don't make things worse any more. It is appreciated even if I don't actually empathize in the normal way. I only score 35 on an emotional intelligence test. I have a troubled sister and at the end of any serious conversation we do a gag bit "I'm glad I'm not you" and she responds the same - I may not understand but she can get things off her chest and she now knows I'm not judging her (she always thought I was judging her, all these years).
I empathize in other ways - detest unfairness, inequality, I root for the underdog, helpful when it comes to children and seniors. But pay little attention to anyone my age.
I think it's a part of autism to think about yourself, and I don't mean in an egotistical way. Most of what I do/don't do is based on how it affects me in one way or another, what I like, how to handle people so my life is easier. I'm lucky I was born with a sense of duty to those I'm responsible for. I'm not an ass, people think I'm ok, but I sure am enjoying this pandemic a little too much. Shallow on paper I guess, but it certainly isn't intentional, it just is. I'm working on it.

Traditionally marriage and parenthood forced people into a life where little thought of self could survive. However, this can be a huge first step and, if wrong choices are made, lasting and deep pain can be experienced.

It may be possible to find situations where one is drawn out of the world of self, but does not require such a permanent investiture.

I discovered in high school that I could go to a school dance if I "worked" at the coat check it would provide a service to others. The task was sufficient to redirect excessive self focus, but was also able to buffer social interaction to a manageable level.

You may wish to consider some way that work could be done for others in a similar way so that there would be a limit on the time the mind has to pursue less than healthy paths.