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Mountain Goat
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11 Jul 2020, 5:53 pm

Right. Recently I have spent a few days in another place. First time since lockdown I have been able to leave my locality and my Mum wanted to help some people we know who are elderly and run a B&B and they needed to get the place ready to recieve customers. They also have a garden railway which needed to be ready as part of their business, so I was in my element... So it was a "Holiday" for me to de-stress (As I had been soo stressed at home during lockdown as my nephew had to stay with us and due to other issues).
Now I have been struggling. I don't "Feel" anxiety or stress unless I have them heavy where I then realize that I have been anxious or stressed foe some time. (If that makes sense?) Sometimes my Mum will mention it and I will suddenly realize she is right etc... So I can be stressed without knowing it befire I realize how stressed I have been, and part of this has been that I have had nightly heartburn and my throat closing up where I have recently been on medication to stop it from taking place.

Now the drive up through some lovely scenery to the people we know was lovely and while the first day or two I was a bit fragile, where my balance was "Iffy" etc, but by the time the third day came where I had settled to dedicate myself to relax and just slowly with no pressure clean the track of this lovely garden railway, I was starting to enjoy... But I have been achy as I have been bending over and getting into difficult places leaning over ponds and the viaduct etc to reach things. But it has been good. I have been soaked a fair few times! The first two days one of the elderly ladies was stressed and because I had to ask her a few times where things were that I needed, the other lady had mentioned that I was a bit difficult which hit me so I became stressed and fragile... (But I felt fragile through trying to push through partial shutdowns before this...).
But by the time the third day came where I was more relaxed I was less fragile and then the fourth day I was far less stressed, and I was really enjoying myself... Mainly track cleaning, but we then had good weather, so I was painting. Now the paint was shed pint so was water and wax based, and there was a breeze where I was as it was all outdoors, and so I did not hit any sensory issues I would normally hit through trying to paint, so I ended up painting most of their viaduct... Where I could relax and just concentrate on one thing. I was asked to think about another task but I had to ignore it and it was in hand with one of the ladies so I did not have my plans interupted. It was just painting the viaduct, clearing up and packing to go home.
So by this time, even though I was aching, I was ok, and did not have any shutdowns, as I had planned the day and it had roughly gone to plan, and I relaxed with not much pressure. Just me, the viaduct, pint ad the paintbrush.

My Mum did lots of pinting and other things. She is amazing.

Now if you asked me if I could have done what I did a few weeks ago I would not have been able to do it.
Now I forgot to take the tablets yesterday and two days before that and yet no issues.

And even now I seem to be able to do more then I was able to do before.

The question is why? Was it due to the change of enviroment? As I have felt that I always feel better the few times I have had the odd week somewhere different. Is it the sense of adventure? Or the change of enviroment? We have had many occasions of chlorine gas coming out of the taps at times. Could this cause issues? Or could it be that a change is as good as a rest type of thing?

Also another thought. Though I yave not been assessed yet, but what could be related to autism traits (Even if I am not on the spectrum though I probably am on the spectrum from what others say...), and what could be other factors like the enviroment or something else?

Why did I start to feel so much better once the first two days had passed then I did before I went there, and even now that I am back I feel better... Though I am not quite as lively as I was when up there.

I hope that I am making sense and that someone with some insight can make sense of this, as I have often found that when I have had the odd few days away (Which is not that often... Maybe a week every two or three years on average? Sometimes a week every five or seven years... Depending on the years one looks at... The odd year I may have been away a couple of times a year, but not all that often has this happened for more then a single break away... But it has been known)... Why is it that despite me driving miles and miles and being tired, that I seem to be physically able to do more?
Could it be where we live? Or is it the adventure of something new? It puzzles me!


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PoseyBuster88
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11 Jul 2020, 6:36 pm

My guess is that having all those solitary, enjoyable projects to do helped you de-stress. I find that solitary work days are some of my best days emotionally, even if I have muscle aches from them.

Perhaps you could look into finding work that would replicate this? Like helping neighbors tend to their gardens or yards (depending on your region and which word is appropriate, haha). Even if you did it on a volunteer basis for the elderly or disabled, you may find it helps your mental health.


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Mountain Goat
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11 Jul 2020, 6:55 pm

PoseyBuster88 wrote:
My guess is that having all those solitary, enjoyable projects to do helped you de-stress. I find that solitary work days are some of my best days emotionally, even if I have muscle aches from them.

Perhaps you could look into finding work that would replicate this? Like helping neighbors tend to their gardens or yards (depending on your region and which word is appropriate, haha). Even if you did it on a volunteer basis for the elderly or disabled, you may find it helps your mental health.


Ooh gosh noo! Helping any of my neighbours would reach another elderly neighbour who is an expert manipulator and works by the hint system, so I seem to often find myself in her bad books and she plots revenge! Besides, in recent years I have deteriated to the point where I have not been able to do a lot so have been unable to work. It is why I am soo thrilled to have managed to do the things recently on the few days I have had elsewhere and why I have been puzzled as how it can make such a difference.
It could be the change of enviroment that has made the difference.


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greenmm37
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11 Jul 2020, 7:16 pm

Mountain Goat wrote:
Ooh gosh noo! Helping any of my neighbours would reach another elderly neighbour who is an expert manipulator and works by the hint system, so I seem to often find myself in her bad books and she plots revenge! Besides, in recent years I have deteriated to the point where I have not been able to do a lot so have been unable to work. It is why I am soo thrilled to have managed to do the things recently on the few days I have had elsewhere and why I have been puzzled as how it can make such a difference.
It could be the change of enviroment that has made the difference.

I'm sorry our neighbour treats you that way :(

I would agree with your assessment that the change in environment likely has a lot to do with it - from your initial post I take it you've been feeling a bit stressed by your home environment, even if it's not due to any specific factor. I have recently been finding it difficult being at home with my whole family home 24/7 and not having many or any opportunities to go out. I also think that perhaps having a focused task to work on while you were away may have resulted in the unusual increase in energy/ability to work on it? I know you have things you enjoy working on when you're home, though, so I'm afraid I can't offer a direct solution in that area.

You mentioned earlier that you are likely on the spectrum, and I know that for many people with autism (myself included) it's common to need alone time, or quietude, so a home environment can generally make that worse, with a near constant hustle and bustle. I don't think you're necessarily asking for solutions to your stress and such, but do you have some local places you can go to to make subtle environmental changes more regular? I hope you can find ways to re-capture the good experience you had on your recent trip.



Mountain Goat
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11 Jul 2020, 7:37 pm

Ways to re-capture my experience... Uhmmm. In a model railway?


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greenmm37
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11 Jul 2020, 7:43 pm

Mountain Goat wrote:
Ways to re-capture my experience... Uhmmm. In a model railway?

That works! :mrgreen:



harry12345
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12 Jul 2020, 3:38 pm

I think you've just got enthusiastic about a new project or special interest.

Having something new to do - and getting outside for a bit has given you a lift.



Mountain Goat
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12 Jul 2020, 4:37 pm

It could be Harry. Something different.
The viaduct I liked a lot. It is interesting.


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