Page 1 of 1 [ 4 posts ] 

Kitty4670
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,032
Location: California,USA

12 Sep 2020, 4:05 pm

Why do people think they can talk about Aspergers if they don’t know about Aspergers? If they don’t know then they shouldn’t talk about it. People never realize they could be wrong. I was talking to the guy I met on a dating app, he said something about don’t blame your Aspergers, I was reading the text again, I was crying, cuz he don’t care to learn the truth.



ToughDiamond
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2008
Age: 73
Gender: Male
Posts: 14,534

12 Sep 2020, 7:15 pm

I often read and hear things that people express as fact when it looks pretty clear that they don't really know at all. Not about ASD especially, about practically anything. Maybe a lot of people don't like to admit that they don't know much, and would rather fake the air of an expert in the hope that people won't spot the difference. My guess would be that he was trying to fake it like that. It's nice when you get somebody who listens instead of preaching.



Jiheisho
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 21 Jul 2020
Age: 62
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,507

12 Sep 2020, 7:54 pm

+1



eyelessshiver
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 12 Jun 2020
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 297

12 Sep 2020, 9:01 pm

I feel that he could use some coaching. If you are trying to have any kind of good relationship with someone who has a disability, you want to seek to understand, support, and empower them, with a much different approach...saying something like "that sounds like it must be a challenge having ASD, I admit that I really don't know what that's like, but I'd like to hear more about it..." etc. Later on when he knows you better, maybe he can offer more tips like "I believe you can do this despite your ASD" but it's not his place to just jump to conclusions early on like that...because even knowing ASD in general is not knowing you as a person with ASD, and like you said, if he knows ASD at all, he knows that it's a big spectrum and each person with autism is an individual...so clearly he's not a good person for you to be trying to talk to. The world is full of people who aren't good for us, as it turns out...