Being polite to NT's to slow down their speech

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Danusaurus
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18 Oct 2020, 12:45 pm

K so I've this issue where I seem to store conversations for later analysis plus to form a visual image so I know what to expect and. Ice met an NT chick and I really really like her and I know she likes me .. so I went for a walk to the store to get a coffee and it's raining and I have some weird issue with getting wet so it was hard to enjoy the small time we spent together, anyways.. she talks very fast and it's hard to put everything she says together in conversation. I don't want to be rude but how should I say can U please slow down your conversation so I picture it for later use if I feel that it will be of importance. Like her likes and interests etc. But I don't want to scare her off and she doesn't mind autism she knows I have it. So this Can be a factor in your review of my question. Advice??

Dani.



Juliette
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18 Oct 2020, 1:01 pm

I’d forgotten how fast some fellow Aussie women can talk till I returned about 4 years ago :lol:. That’s great that you have a connection with this lady, so maybe you could lightheartedly say something to her next time like .... “takes me a bit to process convos ... could you please repeat or slow it down a little... just my quirky brain hehe?” with a smile....



Danusaurus
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18 Oct 2020, 6:35 pm

Juliette wrote:
I’d forgotten how fast some fellow Aussie women can talk till I returned about 4 years ago :lol:. That’s great that you have a connection with this lady, so maybe you could lightheartedly say something to her next time like .... “takes me a bit to process convos ... could you please repeat or slow it down a little... just my quirky brain hehe?” with a smile....


I think I'm way to nervous to say or imply anything. I couldn't handle it if I got rejected and I think I'm going to get hurt anyway so I best be ignoring her. I know how this is gonna end up. I rather not go all in with my total energy and effort as I can see something is always gon end up being the same old hurt cause I'll not fit in even though she likes me (she says she does) but I don't know if I really believe her after careful analysis of the overall factors that I can link to previous failures. :( :? :cry: :| :skull:



Jakki
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18 Oct 2020, 6:44 pm

Danusaurus wrote:
Juliette wrote:
I’d forgotten how fast some fellow Aussie women can talk till I returned about 4 years ago :lol:. That’s great that you have a connection with this lady, so maybe you could lightheartedly say something to her next time like .... “takes me a bit to process convos ... could you please repeat or slow it down a little... just my quirky brain hehe?” with a smile....


I think I'm way to nervous to say or imply anything. I couldn't handle it if I got rejected and I think I'm going to get hurt anyway so I best be ignoring her. I know how this is gonna end up. I rather not go all in with my total energy and effort as I can see something is always gon end up being the same old hurt cause I'll not fit in even though she likes me (she says she does) but I don't know if I really believe her after careful analysis of the overall factors that I can link to previous failures. :( :? :cry: :| :skull:


Nothing ventured nothing gained, I like juliettes. Advise on this


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Danusaurus
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19 Oct 2020, 6:43 am

Guys in regards to my original post. It's ok.. as usual she's wanting me to be someone else , something I've no interest in being and something that is somewhat painful. I can't explain it any other way metaphorically. I realised in this particular instance it's irrelevant about her speech.. I just end up in the same way, physically and mentally. So I'm just going to fight my thoughts of will I or won't I.. I'm just in a state of the most obscure depression and I can say depression cause it's been well over two weeks of constant internal pain anyhow but this is my final straw with nt's, people in general, life, anything, I feel relief inside for some strange reason and this is like a motivator for my final chronological clocks curtain. But I also feel a massive universal black hole that is my everything that once was, could have been, and whatever is left of me. You know your a piece of s**t when he suicide call back service hangs up on you twice. That's reality. No long is it: it is, therefore I am.



FleaOfTheChill
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19 Oct 2020, 7:35 am

Ok, that's seriously (edit) up. They hung up on you? I don't get rattled much, but that pisses me off. I'm so sorry they didn't that to you. Not cool.

Im not great at being supportive. It doesn't mean I don't care, it just means my intentions don't always mesh up with my words just right. If I knew the right things to say, I'd say them.



Danusaurus
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19 Oct 2020, 8:49 pm

FleaOfTheChill wrote:
Ok, that's seriously (edit) up. They hung up on you? I don't get rattled much, but that pisses me off. I'm so sorry they didn't that to you. Not cool.

Im not great at being supportive. It doesn't mean I don't care, it just means my intentions don't always mesh up with my words just right. If I knew the right things to say, I'd say them.


It's ok I learnt that everyone has a BS agenda, fake, liars and don't really give a s**t about humanity and are assholes better yet.. bastards. All my total of 2 friends don't speak to me are the above and can go to hell for their input in destroying my life and/or not trying to help in anyway whatsoever to improve it. All their actions smell of BS and have only aided in being everything except a friend. I don't even know what one is, so it's probably me. They only want me to remain alive so they can help themselves. Or given what I've gone through.. likely waiting for their insurance policies on me to allow them to successfully take me out. It's probably with. Much assistance from my family.



Danusaurus
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19 Oct 2020, 8:54 pm

What makes me most livid is they lavish on themselves and rather than help me they choose to refrain from aiding me with coping mechanisms weather legal or not but have no issues with helping themselves and their cliques to f**k my life in the process. Bastards. I hate people and I don't care anymore.. NT or not, they know they do it. They know my condition with ASD yet they still treat me as a science experiment. Bastards are my family n so called friends.



Juliette
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Yesterday, 8:08 am

Dani, from all you've written, it sounds like you're in self destruct mode. You overdosed the other night, have taken some major losses, wife and children ... friends ... you're right to not even try with the NT lady who wants you to be something you're not right now. Makes far more sense to work on your own life and your self worth before getting involved with anyone. Please think of us here, as family. We want to help you. Honestly though, that begins with you. No-one else can help you until you help yourself and decide you want to live and want to improve things.

Looking at what illegal substances you're putting into yourself, and getting yourself involved in a programme to help you out of that is part of the process. Only you can make that decision. You have to want it, in order for it to work. You're angry at the world and at life right now ... The life you could have is very different to the life you currently have. If you want a better life, it could be yours but it takes alot of work and determination. You might feel like giving up on everyone and everything right now, and your mental state is well and truly being affected by trauma. I hate seeing you on this path as I watched my brother go through the same. No good can come of it, unless you want to help yourself.

You need a stable roof over your head and enough food. You mention hunger. If you're on a disability living allowance(?) at the moment, but fighting demons, and using substances, without being on a programme to get you off of that self destructive path, you need to make some hard decisions. I really hope you can find your way out of where you are right now. It didn't end well for my brother, and I don't want that to happen to you. Being on the spectrum means that if you're taking certain substances, you're putting yourself in major danger of "other" issues ... Maybe you need to talk with someone, and deal with your past, in order to make a decision to start looking after yourself properly and being kinder to yourself. You were born to live a healthy, happy, fulfilling life ... you're off the path ... but need to get back on it. No matter what anyone tells you, you can do it and you are worth it.