My boss and my father are a bit too overprotective to me. They often think that they must prevent me to make errors. I think differently about possible risks of making errors. Especially I must choose between two options each with different consequences.
I have a few examples. One is taking the corona vaccine. Must I take it? What if I take it, and what if I don't? I want to know what happens when I contract the desease and what the side effects of the vaccine is. Getting COVID-19 is less riskful for me, than getting the vaccine. My father, who took the vaccine, finds that really stupid, and that I made the wrong decision. But my decision is based on scientific facts, not about state propaganda, for which there is no scientific evidence. He thinks that COVID-19 is a very dangerous disease, but I think it's not. In the past I have had more serious diseases than what I know about COVID-19.
The other is a big car vacation through Germany, Belgium and France (I live in the Netherlands). My father thinks it's crazy, possibly because he thinks he couldn't managing driving the car and following the Google Maps Navigation at the same time, especially in a big city like Berlin, Paris and Brussels. My father isn't capable of doing that, although he is not on the spectrum.
On that vacation a few things went wrong: I drove from Enschede (where I live) to Berlin. That took about 6 hours. That went well. Later on I drove from Berlin to Cologne. First the Autobahn near Hannover was closed. I had to drive through the city, and it took 9 hours (including taking breaks often and long enough), and when I went to Gerolstein and Cologne I was exhausted. I didn't expect that. My father sees that as a structural problem. I see it as a problem of that moment. It can be easily solved when I would do that again: booking a hotel between Berlin and Cologn halfway and continue driving from that point the next day.
The second error I made is: driving in the center of Paris. That was quite a challenge and a bit stressful. I was glad that I was either in the big parking garage or on the Boulevard Périphérique, the big highway around Paris. A problem that can be avoided the next time: going to one of the Parisian suburbs and take the public transport to the center.
I want to learn form the problems and think how I can avoid them the next time. My father thinks I should be protected against it, so that I don't make those errors. Why may I not make errors and learn from them? I want to know what the causes are of those errors/problems and how to avoid them the next time? There might be autistics that get very frustrated or discouraged when making errors, but I am not like that. I want to make errors like everyone else (autistic or not) and learn from them!
It is true that I must avoid errors before making them, when the consequences are very serious and likely kill me. And when someone gives a recommendation, I do want to look into it and see whether it is useful for me. But I will still compare that recommendation with my ideas. I can either reject the recommendation or my own idea, which of the two is worse.
11 Sep 2021, 2:32 am
