being compared to others on the spectrum

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Angnix
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23 Aug 2017, 10:39 am

Being undiagnosed after 10 years of suspecting... I recently tuned into an older lady at the hospital (I'm still battling depression here) when I heard the word "Asperger's". She was talking to someone else about her adult son with AS. Well over the next few days, she didn't talk to me about AS but she kept saying " I like you because you are so much like my son!" And the lady started to act like my mommy, lol. Several times I've had people compare me to Aspies they know and it always bothers me..... I can't stand being "unofficial" for some reason. I am an "official" bipolar person but they seem to not be interested by any AS symptoms... Or they say I'm not "severe" enough... I don"t understand why it bothers me so?


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elf_wizard
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23 Aug 2017, 11:20 am

I hear you on being bothered by lacking a diagnosis. I decided that I wouldn't try to get diagnosed after consulting a friend who works with spectrum people. But it still bothers me, naturally, if somewhat irrationally. I am slowing talking myself out of caring about it by reminding myself of a few things:

1.) Autism existed before there was a medical diagnosis for it. It was just as valid without the existence of a diagnosis.
2.) Reasonable, educated professionals may disagree on a diagnosis.
3.) Mistakes can be made in diagnosis.
4.) The professionals I have interacted with and non-professionals in the community have not indicated that they disagree with my assesment (that I'm on the spectrum).
5.) This is just my personal situation, but it's expensive and being diagnosed doesn't necessarily translate to having access to treatment as an adult that I don't already have access to. In other words, not having it isn't preventing me from doing anything I would otherwise do.



Angnix
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23 Aug 2017, 3:41 pm

See, I'm going to the psychiatrist tomorrow and I think my mood is okay most of the time but when I'm stressed or upset I meltdown and meds do not control that and I really don't know how to explain that to her... I meltdown, end up in psych ward, they change meds, I get sent back home because I quickly recover away from the stress, then it happens again.


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B19
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23 Aug 2017, 4:28 pm

I have read a lot of commentary, both here and elsewhere about ASD being misdiagnosed as bipolar. The two can be co-morbid, of course, but when they are it seems that ASD is often the missed diagnosis.

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23 Aug 2017, 4:42 pm

Angnix wrote:
when I'm stressed or upset I meltdown and meds do not control that


Angnix wrote:
I really don't know how to explain that to her


Angnix wrote:
I get sent back home because I quickly recover away from the stress, then it happens again.


That all sounds like Autism, because: there are no meds that will treat it; Selective Mutism makes expressing ones emotions difficult to impossible; and removal of the stressors (unfamiliar environment, social pressures) relieves the symptoms, but the anxiety attacks recur when other stress factors arise.

Been there, done that. A million times.


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Noca
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23 Aug 2017, 8:44 pm

It all boils down to healthcare professionals incompetence in their inability to understand the value of a diagnosis beyond simply looking at it from a treatment perspective.


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TheSilentOne
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24 Aug 2017, 2:57 pm

I have two cousins on the spectrum, one who is further on the spectrum than I am and one who is less far on it. Our moms compare us a lot and especially compared us when we were younger. It bothers me to be compared to anybody, to be honest, spectrum or not. Everybody is different.


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North1
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24 Aug 2017, 3:25 pm

I hope it went ok at your psychiatrists visit today, Angnix.



PhosphorusDecree
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24 Aug 2017, 4:22 pm

Not many people IRL know I'm on the autistic spectrum yet. But I've already had the reaction "I would never have guessed that. Are you sure?" a couple of times. I'm not too upset by that because until about 3 years ago I might have reacted the same to someone who wasn't a walking stereotype of the condition...

I guess when you're the /second/ Aspie in someone's life, that may be a big deal to them? Like, suddenly they have someone to compare a friend or family member to, and things start making sense to them.


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Angnix
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24 Aug 2017, 6:02 pm

Psycharist thinks only thing that would help me would be DBT therapy. I forgot to bring up autism. She just said people with"emotional overreactions" do not respond to meds.


Oh, and I'm bipolar, I've had some very clear episodes of mania, depression and mixed episodes. Those are responding well to meds... But the meds do not touch the metltdowns at all and during meltdowns I get suddenly suicidal too which is very unpleasant.


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