Argggg...

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That's how I feel right now.

Care to explain anymore so we might actually be able to get a discussion going here?

A mixture of things. Having difficulties communicating today, but I seem to be improving. I saw The Closer last night. It had a high functioning autistic boy on it that was VERY MUCH like me (except my verbal traits are way more extreme). I had a hard time watching it because I felt like I was seeing myself from a perspective I am unfamiliar with.

The show left me with some emotions that I don't recognize.

I haven't seen the movie but I want to see it. And yes I know that feeling of 'Arrgh!' right now... I haven't seen you in so long. Heh. *tickles DeepThought* Get on Starchat silly, I want to talk to you.

HEhe..

I have been avoiding chatrooms, or trying to. I get so obsessed and can't leave for weeks, so I decided to give this place a try while I am taking a break from recording. I will start working on the CD again later this week, or early next week, so I am trying to do this stuff with more moderation. Plus, my companion is intervening in my online activities more to help keep my stress levels down and so I don't just try to abandon this project because I got too wound up in trying to be social.

I think I was one of the first members here, but never used the place.

I think that happens to all of us sometimes.

I don't know the show you are referring to, but I understand the feeling.
I just finished reading Jules Verne's The Mysterious Island yesterday and I have been "upset" ever since.

The ending really bothered me. I can't exactly describe it. (And I don't want to give too much away in case someone else wants to read this absolutely fabulous book.)

I'm -- distraught. Traumatised? I want to cry "Noooooooooo!" and tear out my hair. I'm bouncing my leg and rocking just thinking about it. I have never been so upset from a stupid book. Mind you, all this not at the solution to the mystery (very clever and unexpected!), but at the last great incident that closes the book.

I feel very confused and stupid about my emotional response.

For me it almost feels like some sort of overload that won't go away, or like depression. For instance, I don't seem to have any desires other than to just sit here and doing nothing.

Last edited by DeepThought on 27 Jul 2005, 3:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Exactly. I can't "get away from it."

I edited my post...

Sometimes when I am overloaded I go into a state in which I am no longer able to function. Sometimes this state is worse than at others. I often go totally mute in this state, but sometimes it is so bad that my companion has to physically help me get from one place to another, otherwise I will just stand, or sit and stare at something. She refers to this as my "low functioning state" and all day I have felt like I have been caught right on the line between my usual state and this "low functioning" one.

Well, I'm not in a non-functional state, but this sense of anger/trauma/unfairness/distress seems to be coloring my thoughts no matter what else I am doing.

Exactly. With me, when those feelings get too intense, I just shut down. They can color my thoughts so much that trying to do anything productive just turns out to be a waste of time and what I think I would enjoy I just can't bear the thought of doing. Like right now, I NEED to be working on the last song for my CD, but I can't even bear the thought of picking up a guitar. I just feel like I would want to smash it.