Does It Offend You . . .

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Does it offend you that AS people are often described as being self-centered?

EDIT -

And described as cold and compassionless?

Last edited by lastcrazyhorn on 18 Oct 2007, 3:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Depends... I happily admit I am too self-centered so I don't mind voluntarely admitting it. I would not agree if someone generalises though and says all AS people are like that. I may be (sorry) but I don^'t think these type of generalisations are fair.

Seconded.

I'll admit I can be extremely self-centered quite often. So, no, it doesn't bother me one bit.

We can hardly denie this thing.
Although under influence of alcohol i tend to be alot self centered.

I think all humans are self centred. The difference is, Non aspies/auties tend to pretend they are not and fake altruism while we are quite overt in our self centredness and maybe feel no desire to pretend otherwise, lol.

Perfectly put.

Offend me? No.
Annoy me? (the last bit) A little, because it's so wildly inaccurate. I've never met a "cold and compassionless" Aspie over the age of about 15. Even the ones under that age who might be assumed to be so really haven't been. They've just taken longer to connect with their feelings - which were there, by the way. It's not that they had nothing there.

Psichology speaks clearly: there is NO such thing as altruism. You only get good (beneficial to others) or bad (detrimental to others) egoism, that's all.

The only difference between us and NT's is the way we act out our egoism.

People who complain about self-centeredness are probably upset that you're not paying attention to THEM.
Throw a copy of the Fountainhead at them and be on your way.

No, because I definitely agree that I'm self-centered.

Nobody ever told me aspies are self centered, but why should it bother me? I am very self centered.

I am RARELY self centered, but what offends me is when those that say I am self centered or selfish are the very ones that are self centered or selfish in the equation. Like the times people have taken credit for MY work(even when they know NOTHING about it), or the ones that eat MY food(EVEN when I offer to pay for food for THEM)!

BTW The last time I ever heard an accusation of this nature is about 16 years ago.(When that woman called me a jerk because I didn't want her touching my food) You have to realize that I am VERY picky about food. If a person touches it, I may STARVE rather than eat it. And HOW is it selfish to buy her her own food? SHE was selfish for denying me comfort I paid for. After all, if I was 180 degrees opposite, I could merely get food from the garbage. I wonder if she would have taken it THEN!

HECK, I haven't even been going to the dentist regularly. Of course, some would call my staying by myself, and not wanting to go to social events, etc... self centered. In THAT case, I guess I'm guilty. But do they REALLY care? Usually the answer is NO!

Over the past week, I fought for DAYS! I probably spent 2 man days to get the jerks at verizon to give me what they promised. I didn't even save $50, but it was the principle. They may have seen that as self centered, etc... But frankly I just got TIRED of compromising. NOW, I have an OFFICIAL document stating what has transpired, and they better live up to it. If they don't, I may consider it a breach of contract and consider all contracts I have with them VOID! That means they lose every bit of my business.

Earlier this year, I fought a company and got the government involved. I got the FDA involved, and was just about to get the FTC involved. THAT probably took a man week. THEY caved also.

Such things have been RARE though. Usually I am WAY too passive.

It does only because they misstate it. What they call self centeredness isn't. It is actually that we think on a different level and see things from a different point of view. Because I cannot relate to their silly gossipy problems and issues because they are illogical and silly makes ME self centered?
I don't think I am per se. I am usually pretty deep in my own mind most of the day. If that is being self centered then, I guess I am. However, I can be very giving and loving. I have to trust you first though, and that takes a LOT of time. Further, I try to show how I feel to those I care about but they don't see it for what it is, so, to them, it does not count for anything.

Nothing offends me anymore...

Graelwyn already said what I was thinking about saying.

I get offended when others try to make me into them and cannot accept me for me and it turns into scolding.
I don't get the whole self centered thing because often I find that others crave alot of attention and also are credit seekers and will take a pre-existing idea knowing that it exists and try to pass it off as their own with a new label all for the credit seeking and validation that comes with that. I am self centered with hobbies. I am also self centered when it comes to my own brain because I've been left alone to figure stuff out and try to deal with life itself.

Theres these things I've become aware of.

-Moderation is the key. That pathway is not easy and it's like constantly walking on a balancing beam. When you fall, sure you may sulk but pick yourself back up again.

- People that are completely unselfish are taken for granted until they die of course. Then there is this big memorial on how great they were.

-People that are too selfish take others for granted. They rely and depend on others and take them for granted and only until that person is gone do they realize that maybe saying and meaning thank you is okay but the deal is, with completely selfish people, if they don't learn a lesson from it, they shrug and do it to the next person.

-People that have their lines and have both selfishness and unselfishness have an on and off switch. When they are catering too much to other people's needs to the point of not having their own personal space, they will either respond to that and let it be known through actions or will speak about their need for their own time. That is when the selfish switch turns on. After they get to relax on their own terms, the selfish switch turns off. The unselfish switch turns back on.