Should I reveal that I am an ASPERGEAN?

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Mw99
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05 Oct 2007, 6:54 pm

I am afraid that if I let everyone know that I actually suffer from a "neuropsychological condition," I will be stigmatized even more.

Ideally, their understanding of my condition would improve the type of treatment I receive from them and the way I interact with them, but I also realize that there are many ignorant people out there (that includes some of my friends and family members) who will be weirded out once they start believing I am "officially crazy."

I want advice from Aspergians who have "come out of the closet" regarding their condition. Did revealing that you have AS make your life easier, harder or the same? How did the treatment you received from NTs change after the revelation?



EvilKimEvil
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05 Oct 2007, 7:36 pm

I don't have any advice, but the same question has been on my mind. I think that with friends and family, I'll just decide based on the individual and my relationship with them. But at work, it seems like a catch-22. You have to tell them (in writing) to be protected from discrimination, but a lot of the people I've worked with would definitely treat me differently if they knew.



MysteryFan3
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05 Oct 2007, 8:15 pm

Advice I've seen here and elsewhere: reveal it on a need to know basis only.


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sinsboldly
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05 Oct 2007, 8:17 pm

in the first rush of finally finding the answer to the 64 thousand dollar question ("What is YOUR problem. . .?") I told my supervisor. Later, I slowly broke the news to folks I work with, one co worker stated "oh, I thought you were a ret*d, but you do the same job I do, and you can't be ah. .ah.. ret*d person, I mean someone who is ret*d, I mean somebody that can't do our job."

Most people didn't have a clue what I was talking about, because I didn't say the buzz word "autism". neurologically I was an PC when they might be a Mac is how I described it. at least they knew I identified with what they basically were in my anology (as a computer), like they could relate to.

I didn't notice a lot of prejudice about it, it wasn't like they had to conceal a lot of baggage as if I had come out gay or suddenly turned another skin pigmentation over night. the motherly ladyy that treated me as a child started treating me like I was simple instead, after a while she must have forgot and and started treating me as a child again.

When I transfer in my job, and move to a large metro area, I am not going to tell my work. I am going to do my networking with other groups and just be me.

your milage may vary, but I got a much better reaction when years ago I told everyone I was sober. They have groups that pat you on the back and work with you to understand the diagnosis and what it means to your life. I got no parade with my understanding of my AS. too bad, I love elephants and brass bands if I am not too close.

Merle



Last edited by sinsboldly on 05 Oct 2007, 8:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Robxx
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05 Oct 2007, 8:23 pm

I'd say tell anyone you're close to.

I'm still on the rollercoaster but after telling a few people about my experiences with 'the professionals' and showing them things about AS I've had a resounding "well, that makes everything make a lot more sense".

I've actually really got to know somebody because they were asking me what was on my mind, and I'm going the cinema with her tomorrow. So talking about it with people actually had a benefit.

If somebody knows what your problems are, 4/5 times they will consciously try and make things easier. Like not feeling rejected after a lack of eye contact or spelling something out simply. I'd been doing that for a long time and my friends and close ones had just learned to adjust.



siuan
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05 Oct 2007, 8:33 pm

Reveal it if you think it is necessary, otherwise I wouldn't.

When we told my mother-in-law that we felt our daughter had Asperger's, her response was, "I don't think she's ret*d."

Sigh. :roll:

I didn't even touch on the fact that I have AS.


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2ukenkerl
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05 Oct 2007, 8:39 pm

siuan wrote:
Reveal it if you think it is necessary, otherwise I wouldn't.

When we told my mother-in-law that we felt our daughter had Asperger's, her response was, "I don't think she's ret*d."

Sigh. :roll:

I didn't even touch on the fact that I have AS.


SO, did you tell your mother in law that many AS people are pretty smart, and ******NONE******* are ret*d!? :lol: If so, how did she react?



06 Oct 2007, 2:50 am

I told my boyfriend about my diagnoses and he is still the same. Nothing changed. He still treats me nice with respect but at least he understands now I don't like lot of touch and being hugged without my permission. He has learned to lay off with over effection.



MishLuvsHer2Boys
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06 Oct 2007, 8:53 am

I'd likely wait to get yourself an official diagnosis so you can back it up as some people will look at those that self-diagnose as being hypochondriacs and all.



2ukenkerl
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06 Oct 2007, 9:08 am

likedcalico wrote:
I told my boyfriend about my diagnoses and he is still the same. Nothing changed. He still treats me nice with respect but at least he understands now I don't like lot of touch and being hugged without my permission. He has learned to lay off with over effection.


Actually, if he cared for you at all, he would APPRECIATE the fact that you told him! It allows you to be more aloof and less intimate without giving him concerns. But I am happy it worked out for you! :D



KingdomOfRats
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06 Oct 2007, 12:16 pm

Mw99 wrote:
I am afraid that if I let everyone know that I actually suffer from a "neuropsychological condition," I will be stigmatized even more.

Ideally, their understanding of my condition would improve the type of treatment I receive from them and the way I interact with them, but I also realize that there are many ignorant people out there (that includes some of my friends and family members) who will be weirded out once they start believing I am "officially crazy."

I want advice from Aspergians who have "come out of the closet" regarding their condition. Did revealing that you have AS make your life easier, harder or the same? How did the treatment you received from NTs change after the revelation?

not aspergan,but can recommend a few things.
do not use words like suffering,suffer,pyschological,mental etc.
unless truly believe are exclusively suffering from aspergers [rather than the blame being on other people who don't adapt or accept differences],then don't use it because it will make ignorance worse,it makes it look like an illness as they are widely used 'illness' words,different if it's with people who know AS but with people who don't they might assume it's like cancer or aids.



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06 Oct 2007, 12:40 pm

Only let people know if you are ready to accept that some people may react positively and treat you the same and that others may react negatively, accuse you of lying, treat you like you are ret*d etc.

If you are not ready for that...then I would suggest not to unless it is vital.


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