Mw99 wrote:
Do we prefer to be alone for the sake of being alone? Or do we prefer to be alone because we are unable to have meaningful interactions with people and prefer to spare ourselves the emotional pain of being rejected?
That's a damn fine question. I don't know? Both? To me, aloneness feels, had felt, like my natural state for a very long time; and I had come to believe this is true, utterly, and got past worrying about it or thinking about it. But then recently Eris came tiptoeing up behind me and cracked me in the back of my head with her Divine Cricket Bat of Discord; that caused a massive reshuffling of my mental Tetris blocks, and now I'm not so sure...
There are a few whom I can have "meaningful" connections with, the few good friends I have. And I enjoy doing so, love deep cerebral conversations on pretty much whatever topic you like. (Well, I am getting a little tired of politics). There are times when I actually crave human contact; rarely, but it happens. Never arbitrary human contact, contact with people who I know and like.
Beyond them though... I live in a cabin in the forest in relative isolation by choice; I love not having neighbors. I do suppose I need to be alone sometimes, to go hermit if you would, in the same way people need sleep. I suppose it would not be inaccurate to say that I have "meaningful" contact with my cats, spiders, and gods.
I'm not sure how scared I am of "rejection"; I'm very blunt, and I know it puts people off. Are you talking just in terms of regular folks who can't tolerate our weirdness, our discomfort at making small talk, etc? I suppose that can be a painful thing. I'd much rather be alone than be around people who weren't comfortable around me; I'm not sure if that is most people or not, but I suspect it is. But then again, who could say differently about rather being alone than being unwanted? Well... Maybe people who are especially annoying but don't realize it.
For my own part, I will chose to remain a hermit, and partake of human interaction on my own terms.
EDIT: I also just realized, wherever I live I always
must have a room that is mine alone; one with a door that I can shut and lock when I need to be left alone; I guess I do need to be left alone sometimes...
Good fortune,
- Icarus is that crazy hermit who lives on the mountain...
_________________
Please forgive me if, in the heat of battle, I sometimes forget which side I'm on.
Last edited by Icarus_Falling on 30 Oct 2007, 8:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.