Trying to Find the Reason that You're Weird

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OregonBecky
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04 Nov 2007, 2:39 pm

Before I knew about autism spectrum, I blamed my being an overweight kid as the reason that I was weird. I thought that if I were thin, I'd be normal. Then when I got to a normal size, I was stuck on the thought that it was still my body's fault that I was weird.

I'm wondering if something like if an aspy were molested, then the aspy and the shrink can decide that all the weirdness comes from a childhood trauma and not look deeper into why someone has an unusual personality.


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Kalister1
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04 Nov 2007, 2:40 pm

I thought I was an alien :(



alexbeetle
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04 Nov 2007, 2:45 pm

OregonBecky wrote:
I'm wondering if something like if an aspy were molested, then the aspy and the shrink can decide that all the weirdness comes from a childhood trauma and not look deeper into why someone has an unusual personality.


I think this does happen and it took a long time and a lot of failed counselling for me to realise that problems are probably due mainly to AS.


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quirky
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04 Nov 2007, 2:55 pm

I always thought it was that my mom was so controlling and critical, and once I got independence and to a place where people were smarter than at my high school my problems would be solved. Once I got to college, I suddenly realized my problem was a lot deeper. Independence didn't help, and college students aren't that different than high school students. I think when I'm a working adult things will get better, I hope. But yeah, I knew I was on the spectrum, but it wasn't until my first semester of college that I was like "yeah, something's really wrong" and started visiting this site.



Kalister1
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04 Nov 2007, 2:57 pm

quirky wrote:
I always thought it was that my mom was so controlling and critical, and once I got independence and to a place where people were smarter than at my high school my problems would be solved. Once I got to college, I suddenly realized my problem was a lot deeper. Independence didn't help, and college students aren't that different than high school students. I think when I'm a working adult things will get better, I hope. But yeah, I knew I was on the spectrum, but it wasn't until my first semester of college that I was like "yeah, something's really wrong" and started visiting this site.


Yes. Thank you. I've also felt this, though you put it so much personally then I could ever.



Aridarr
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04 Nov 2007, 3:03 pm

I used to think it was because I moved around (from county to county) too much when I was young.

Later, I decided it was because I used to swallow toothpaste and mouthwash; or because I had accidentally swallowed a metal hook when I was 6 or so.

Now, I think it is just a case of genetic oversensitivity.


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Triangular_Trees
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04 Nov 2007, 3:10 pm

I just assumed that most everyone else was crazy (and incredibly stupid at that) :D



jjstar
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04 Nov 2007, 3:12 pm

OregonBecky wrote:
Before I knew about autism spectrum, I blamed my being an overweight kid as the reason that I was weird. I thought that if I were thin, I'd be normal. Then when I got to a normal size, I was stuck on the thought that it was still my body's fault that I was weird.

I'm wondering if something like if an aspy were molested, then the aspy and the shrink can decide that all the weirdness comes from a childhood trauma and not look deeper into why someone has an unusual personality.


There's always a primal trauma which branches out into others. The original primal trauma sets the stage and initiates the program for later traumas - basically rendering a person more susceptible to trauma in their life, as if a pattern and pendulum were set into motion creating the holographic form for repeated trauma, which in effect occurs, until awareness sets in and the cycle/pattern healed. It doesn't heal at once, but one layer at a time.


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IdahoRose
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04 Nov 2007, 3:12 pm

As a child, my differences were chalked up to shyness and eccentricity. When I had really bad OCD, anxiety and depression, everyone thought that once I got on medication and into therapy I'd be fine. But even when I got those problems under control, I still didn't fit in with other people my age.

I finally got diagnosed with AS at the age of 15 when I went to a doctor for blood work, and two other doctors confirmed it.



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04 Nov 2007, 3:29 pm

I thought it was becasue I was gay and in the closet, but when I came out, I still was wierd and did not become more social as a result of coming out.



Lonermutant
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04 Nov 2007, 3:30 pm

I'm exactly like you, Becky.



jazzguy
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04 Nov 2007, 3:47 pm

I decided early on that I was born to bad luck and failure, an idea that was well reinforced by my parents, teachers and kids at school.


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EvilKimEvil
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04 Nov 2007, 4:13 pm

Something similar happened to me. I thought my social awkwardness was due to childhood trauma. I still believe that could be a factor, but I think AS is also involved. Maybe the childhood abuse made the AS more severe than it would have been otherwise, or maybe it just made me more critical of myself.



Lazarus
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04 Nov 2007, 4:13 pm

In the end I just decided that everyone in the world is weird in their own way, because everyone is different.


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Likho
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04 Nov 2007, 4:23 pm

i never thought anything about myself, i didn't even know if i am different or not, i started to wonder when someone told me about as...



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04 Nov 2007, 4:40 pm

I thought it was because my family was so poor.