I'm such a SUCKER!! !

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lol. What sparked this is I was in the Wal-mart parking lot tonight, and a college kid approached me. He was very very careful to explain over and over that he wasn't some weirdo freak, he is just selling magazines for his trip to Rome. So I try to walk away, of course, and he starts talking. Being polite, regardless how uncomfortable I was, I stood there and listened since it was really cold outside and I figured he'd been doing this for a while, as his fingers looked a little purplish, lol.

So I stand there, and listen... and listen... and listen, lol. I tried to tell him a few times that I wasn't interested, but it didn't go over well, as I couldn't get the words out correctly, lol. Then, he asked me if I was okay because I looked uncomfortable. I told him yes, I'm okay, and he asked again a few seconds later, so I tell him I have autism and to not worry because that was most likely why. (I was swaying back and forth a lot, and my fingers were going nuts "typing", lol). He announces "oh, that's cool-I have ADD! Gimme a high five!" lol.

I didn't mind it too much, as he really didn't come across as aggressive or pushy. What I did mind though, was not being able to express that I wasn't interested appropriately, and I have a heck of a time just saying "no" to things, so I wound up buying a subscription to be sent to the kids in Children's Hospital.

I suppose it's okay, but I know I didn't need to be spending that kind of money since I am not working. It was very frustrating, but I thought about it after a bit, and at least my inability to flat out say no wound up being a good cause for some sick children, right?

But why is it so incredibly frustrating that I did so to begin with? Is it merely that I'm aware enough of myself to see where my difficulty was in the situation-the inability to say no-and knowing that I cannot do much about it because I have tried in the past? Sometimes I think self-awareness is very much so a catch 22 in this world...

nobodyzdream,

For what it is worth, I AM THE SAME WAY! But at least we know it, so it isn't from stupidity or some such.

Your heart was in the right place and you wanted to help. There's nothing wrong with this and everything right. The intent is what matters, not the outcome.

Beware of this however, because it can cripple your own life. I had to be told this over and over again, I am a doormat. People take advantage of me to the point where it was crippling my own life. To make it worse, some people were manipulating me over and over again, because they knew I could be manipulated easily.

I realized if I keep letting this happen, I will never be able to truly help people in need. I still do it, though. Plus there is such a thing as a scam artist, unfortunately.

i dont think i'd tell anyone in the wal-mart parkinglot i had autism. thats just asking for wierd looks

I hate that feeling of confusion that comes when someone continue to push you into something after you said no. It is terrible. I don't want to make light of rape, but I can see a sort of parallel there, but in an mental/emotional level. They don't take no for an answer and I really don't know what else I could say to convey that I am not interested. I think that right there is the key part to it. To us a "No, I am not interested." is exactly what it means.
As I hate repeating myself I find after I say "No thanks" more than twice I feel like I have no where to turn to, my options of telling him no have just run out. Then the anxiety level gets raised and my mental acuity drops and I either go running off, get a bit physical if they persist, or think that the only way out is doing whatever they are asking for.

I was stopped one night in a Best Buy parking lot by a guy who claimed his car had run out of gas and it was a few blocks away. I only found out later that it was probably a scam, and I felt really stupid and scared. I don't walk between store parking lots anymore, and try to avoid people in parking lots (although that's hard because I tend to not notice people are there, kind of lost in my own thoughts). I'd like to be able to turn invisible...

I just try to exude a general aura of inapproachability; people who do not know me typically just leave me alone. (People who do know me know that I'm actually a very friendly guy.)

If someone does approach me and try to sell me something I don't want or otherwise get something out of me, they will get exactly one polite but firm, "No thank you." Generally that is enough; if that is ignored, I get very caustic very quickly.

I actually allocate a percentage of my income to support charities and causes and whatnot, but I am very determined about doing so on my own terms.

Good fortune,

- Icarus did buy that coupon book to support his neighbor's son's school football team...

I have aspy friends who are so easily manipulated because they have kind, innocent hearts. It happens a lot.

Hi, I am a door mat. Nice to meet you.

I have that happen all the time.

lol, well, at least I am not the only one I'm just glad that he had an offer that was for a good cause, lol, because I don't know what I would do with a subscription to any magazines at all-I never read them.

One time at university I was stopped by a group of hippies who wanted to talk to me about conservation. I had plenty of time on my hands, so there was absolutely no reason to tell them I wasn't interested. I stood there and listened to what they had to say (with most of it admittedly going straight over the top of my head) and then they asked me to join the Australian Wilderness Society, which would require me to donate a minimum of $30 a month. I feel stupid for doing this, but I gave them my credit card immediately and asked them to sign me up. I just didn't want to disappoint them, and they made me feel as though I had no choice. Turns out that it is a genuine cause, and I am still a (somewhat) proud member to this day.

Well I'm the type of person that generally likes to please, and I do have a bad habit of feigning interest just to satisfy others.