deliberately failing at something...

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I wonder if this is common for any others. I have a class I have not attended, because it is not challenging in any way at all. I went for most of the class, I know if I take the final, I WILL pass the class, but I have decided to not go in and do it.

This semester has been very rough. Starting since about the middle of the semester, here and there I've had to stay home due to a lot of things. Up to this point, the teacher has been very sympathetic and understanding, and has let it go. But as the semester end nears, I have decided that I am not going anymore, because I realize some of those days I didn't go simply because it was challenging. I could have found a way to make it possible to go in, if I had really tried, but I had no motivation.

Others seem baffled by this, but the thought of going in just to pass without having put forth the effort, I feel it would be a dishonest grade earned... the feeling to think about earning a grade dishonestly is literally quite gut-wrenching. In fact, if I think about it enough, I get so disgusted in just the thought of doing something I feel is so morally wrong (for myself, because my ethical standards for myself are VERY high), that I come close to vomiting.

I have missed over 7 (including since I just decided to up and stop going, which counts for about 2 of the classes, so 5 instances of having a reason for not going aside from this) of my classes now, and I know that the teacher would likely allow me to take the tests, because she knows I have a lot going on in my family and is very understanding. I just cannot bring myself to call and explain, just to squeeze through when I KNOW I just simply have not pushed myself because the class isn't challenging enough.

Instead, I've opted to fail... just to stop going, so I can retake the class and get a teacher that actually makes me use my brain from time to time (rather than giving us homework where the answers are all in the back of the book, then just asking us random questions off of the homework and calling it a "quiz"), just so I feel I have made an honest effort in the class (even though I already know all of the course material and should be in a class 2 ahead of this one), and that I have actually had to do something to EARN the grade, rather than having had it pretty much handed to me despite the fact I've just not shown up to over half of the classes as the situation would be if I were to complete this course.

Does anyone else have this type of a problem?

I didn't have EXACTLY the same experience as you in college but my problem was similar. I posted about it elsewhere but I don't remember where. My problem was that I exceled in my major/minor courses (which was I interested in) but in just about every other course I either failed because I never paid attention, or I just stopped going and got an incomplete. I could never get into my general education classes at all (except psych and archaeology) so I just didn't try.

I don't know if it's the same where you are, but so many of the gen ed classes are taught "lecture style" and I can't sit in a room with 100 or more people and listen to someone drone on about something I couldn't care less about. I need to be engaged by the other person and challenged.

yesterday, I called my high school and requested my transcripts...I did not go to college, and 20 some years later, want to see how I really did in school..it was all justa blur to me... I regret not applying myself to some courses, I do not want you to regret your time at school either.....

Rushfanatic,
Since you have been out of high school over 20 years, many colleges and universities will allow you the decision not to submit your high school transcript. I was in a similar situation and many of the colleges I applied to let me omit my high school transcript since it really showed nothing in the way of my true potential to succeed in college. The Admission Committee just needed to know that I possessed a high school diploma or a G.E.D.

It helped that I had taken a few courses at a community college which showed I was capable of getting grades of A. Still, I could
never get into an Ivy League university like Cornell, where my nephew is a freshman in Engineering, as those colleges and
universities are too competitive in the Admission process...yet, if someone went to an excellent community college, got high
academic grades and proved oneself to have risen above major obstacles and setbacks, they could very well have a chance in
the big league.

Most colleges and universities are largely interested in creating a diversity on their campuses...however, if accepted and you don't succeed in your first semester, you get weeded out very quickly.

ZsaZsa, As much as I would love to go to school, with 4 kids, one already in college and wanting to go to another, more expensive university...it is not my season...money is not there for me, they need the headstart more than me..although my heart secretly aches at what I could learn from the experience....history always fascinated me.......

I feel the same way with my Technical Composition class this semester. It feels like there is not point in attending the class when I still get a 95% on a paper that I wasn't very pleased with. The feeling that if I get a near perfect on a paper that in my view is blah, then what point is there in the class. I lose all motivation to attend the class and drift through it.

I have noticed that same feeling in nearly all my general ed classes with the exception of math classes. I like math.

My advice is go and take your final. If you can pass the final, then you know the material and deserve that grade and to pass the class whether or not you felt you put in the work and effort to do so.

If you are still feeling uneasy about it, talk to your teacher and explain how you feel. Maybe they will give you a project to complete to "earn" your grade if that is what you feel you need.

Chalk it up to your Aspie gifts that some classes seem to come naturally without any effort. Some things we naturally get without needing to study, other things we need to study that NTs naturally understand. Such is the way of life.

Maybe an honors type of class would be a better fit for you in classes like this. I have never taken one, but from what I understand is the include extra projects to work on and more involvement.

Ask for an incomplete. Tell your advisor your reason. It is better to be challenged and learn.

Thank you all for your responses I'm glad that I am not the only one who has experienced difficulties such as this.

The funny thing is, I don't do that great in math, and don't like it that much. I don't do well because I don't learn it to retain it. I get the gist of what is going on with something, and I'm ready to move on and do more with it, lol. For some reason I never retain it, even if I do the exercises over and over and over, I'm instantly bored and ready for more. Yet, it only takes a glance of something I've never done before, and I can figure it out based on the example.

I'm pretty sure this teacher won't let me do a project or anything like that. She does absolutely nothing that challenges me in the class, lol. I hit the point where I was just writing the answers directly out of the back of the book, because that was all that was required for me to know in order to pass all of my quizzes. I know what I'm doing come test time, of course, but maybe that is why it was so easy to just not go.

My boyfriend mentioned I should just take the final and pass so I can get into a class that is more challenging, that will keep me mentally stimulated. But I still have huge issues with even the thought of accepting a good grade for passing a class I haven't done anything in. So that is why I'll just take the fail or incomplete-whatever the teacher decides to give me in the end. Chances are she'll probably go with the incomplete because she knows I know the material already.

I know what you guys mean about the other stuff being almost impossible to get motivated for. I actually dropped one class because it was strict lecture (no homework or anything, no attendance was worth points-just 2 tests and that was the entire grade).

I dropped another because I couldn't grasp what the teacher was asking from me, lol. No one else seemed to have that problem, but I kept taking him literally, everything he said. I didn't get anything that was implied, and wound up not getting half of a grade for not turning in rough drafts because every single time he'd just say "we're going to the lab to WORK ON our drafts". He'd never mention it was actually due, so I'd sit there and work on it, reword it, read over it... but not turn it in, because he never said to. I didn't really figure out for sure they were actually due by the end of the class for points until my grade was already too low, lol, and that was the ONLY reason I figured out they were actually due for points.

I also suggest complaining to the department head about this teacher. She does not sound like she is doing a good job and someone should tell her boss that. Maybe they could suggest a teacher to take that will fit your style of learning better.

I failed English class three years in a row because of very similar reasons.

Not school or college, a job.

Six years ago I started a job with a computer software company, the pay was good and the hours were reasonable but the problem was with the product I was meant to support. From the first day of the training course I realized that I had made a terrible mistake because this software sucked, it was really REALLY bad. I therefore decided to hang on at the company as long as possible and then quit when either a) I had had enough or b) I received another job offer.

Well, I managed to last nine months but by that point it was driving me nuts. I had an interview with my line manager and someone from HR for some sort of disciplinary matter and right in the middle of things I stood up and told them F%(K IT! I QUIT! I then told them to send my termination papers in the mail and I walked out the building.

Kids, when you're older you can do this sort of thing, but not now

Ed Almos

At times I just feel offended and decide to fail, just like that.