Communication styles intrinsic to aspergers?

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I lurk in a fair number of online forae. I don't tend to say much, because I'm not a very interesting person. But I read a lot. Since coming to WP, I've been noticing a distinct difference in posting style from the aspies here, compared to the posts I read on other forae. I can't really describe it clearly, but it's like porn: "I know it when I see it."

On other forae, posters talk to each other. Here on WP, it feels as if posters are talking at each other. It feels like the give-and-take of communication is qualitatively different. The majority of threads here on WP are of the style "I think X, what do you think?" and each respondent posts with "I think Y", "I think Z" etc. On other forae, respondents interact much more closely with each other, so that the reasons why each thinks differently are explored and dissected. It becomes a debate where the merits of different points or view are compared and contrasted. WP in contrast feels like a series of disconnected statements - as if each respondent was only in communication with the original poster.

I'm wondering whether this is emergent from the nature of aspergers itself. Perhaps participating in a multi-directional debate is too threatening, so we restrict ourselves to speaking only to the original poster. Or maybe our aspergers prevents us from coping with multi-faceted threads of argument and the implications thereof, so that the thread becomes a turn based show-and-tell instead of a debate.

Please don't for a second think I'm criticising WP for this difference. I was making an observation of difference, and not making a judgement about which style of forum posting is better or worse. The reason I lurk in other forae instead of posting is because even though I can identify other people's posting styles, I can't reproduce it myself. I'm writing this post by 'talking' to the text box as if I were adding a post to my Livejournal, rather than talking to the flesh-and-blood people that you guys are behind the computer screens. It felt like coming home, when I found a whole forum of people who seemed to communicate in the same stilted way that I do.

That's interesting.
I know that I usually try to stay on topic and reply to the original poster because there was some unwritten rule about not hijacking someone else's thread.
Have you checked out the dino-aspie cafe?

I thought the dino-aspie threads were for aspies of 40+. At the 'tender' age of 26, I didn't think I was old enough to take part in something like that.

Gee, I thought the posting style was similar. I am not trying to talk AT anyone. The way I am talking now is as I always do. We try to dissect others posts. You HAVE to with some of the ideas that come up. I GUESS that is to be expected. I am finidng that things *I* thought were normal aren't. I start questioning everything else.

I am also on forums others than this one, some that I contribute to and some that I just read, and have noticed the same thing. This difference in communicating is also apparent real time with my friends who are also on the spectrum, we tend to talk at each other rather than to each other. Like you said, there is nothing wrong with this, its just the way we talk.

I have also noticed that there are less locked threads and ridiculous arguements here than on some of the other sites, so I consider that a bonus to this method of communication.

If a thread spawns a new topic, usually a new thread is created. For example, the "post pics of hottest men" thread in the love and dating forum later inspired a "post pics of hottest women" thread (although I may have that backwards).

You have to look at the entire forum to understand if there's an extended debate going on or not...

Hi there, i'm from Cambridge too, nice to meet you!

I also find it interesting that this board has a lot more people speaking in complete sentences than most boards have. That's the biggest difference that I've noticed personally.

Aspies tend to have larger vocabularies, and I seem to recall that formality of thought and speech is also a characteristic - so complete sentences would be a logical result.

(I'm still internally giggling that one of the questions during the appointment when I was diagnosed was "Who is your favourite character from Star Trek?")

(You were asked about Star Trek? Like, seriously or in a jocking manner?)

I think we had another topic about this a long time ago and a lot people agreed that there are few real conversation in one topic on WP. Funny enough, I can second what was already said here: there are few locked topics and I've yet to see horrible arguments all other the place. I've experienced that on other autism forums and hated it - either people were shouting at each other because of their differences or all agreed with each other, because they were of similar opinions.
I know I have trouble communicating the non-autistic way, but I also have trouble communicating in a similar fashion with autistic people. So I'm not mainly interested in narrow discussions, because I feel that I can't keep up for too long. Anyways, the thing I like best about WP is that if you feel like it, you can read through lots of opinions and you won't be involved in an argument just by posting. The downside is indeed that at some times I wish I'd be able to really discuss an idea.

Seriously - my head-shrinker asked me who I liked best on Star Trek! I said that my favourite character is Captain Kirk, because I identify strongly with Spock, and Kirk is his best friend. (Hmm - I think I might have triggered the "overthinks everything" criteria on that one.)

I really do like the respectful and non-confrontational style of discussion here. I agree with feeling like it's hard to get deep into a discussion on a single topic. Possibly that's partly because we all have wildly divergent special interests, and have all been traumatised by NTs telling us no-one's interested in hearing us witter on. It's only very recently that I've admitted my love of anime and graphic novels to my family, and no-one except my husband knows that I occasionally entertain thoughts of writing Star Trek fan fiction. In many ways, having been granted the diagnosis of aspergers has given me permission to nurture my inner geek.

That's so true! I've always noticed that others boards have a different "feel," but I couldn't place what was different about them. These boards tend to be less intimate (less teasing each other, for instance) and more about an exchange of information, I think. And the arguments here tend to be about significant issues rather than trivial "picking fights." I've also noticed that most arguments are about people being too closed-minded; as in, usually if someone complains about a post, it's to say something along the lines of, "That's the most biased and unfactual thing I've ever heard." LOL. It's interesting...

To point out the obvious: AS/AD is social impairment first and foremost; socialization and communication being the two biggest areas of deficit. Just because we have a medium to converse in that's not as overwhelming to us doesn't mean said medium bestows on us the ability to interact with others "normally".

If you observe here long enough you can discern the patterns of speech, whether pedantic, overly formal, odd, "educated", "uneducated" (whether said individual is educated or not is besides the point); repetitious, stereotyped and whatnot.

You can tell that something isn't "right" in how many of us interact here, it's as clear as day to me.