I wish people wouldn't do this

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firemonkey
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30 Aug 2020, 4:02 am

Judge how well a person is functioning based on their forum participation .

magz
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30 Aug 2020, 5:35 am

That's often extremely misleading, both directions.

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Edna3362
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30 Aug 2020, 5:45 am

As someone who sucks at commanding texts, oh yes.

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firemonkey
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30 Aug 2020, 7:39 am

magz wrote:

That's often extremely misleading, both directions.

Totally agree.

Joe90
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30 Aug 2020, 12:15 pm

I've been told that I must have a high IQ because of how well my posts are written. My IQ is around average, or even below on some things like mathematical things, but I am somewhat of a perfectionist when it comes to writing because I do enjoy writing and I want my posts to make sense as I'm not very good at explaining things.

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Nades
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30 Aug 2020, 3:56 pm

Seeing this thread was made minutes after the comment you made on my thread about basing what you can do from on forum posts I assume this thread is targeted towards me. Your first comment you made on my thread you seemed to assumed the thread was aimed at you personally to some degree. It wasn't I didn't even know you were a member at the time or where you got that assumption from.

The thread was not aimed at any particular person in general and was about the autistic community as a collective whole.

League_Girl
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30 Aug 2020, 4:01 pm

Nades wrote:

What I learned from being a member here is when you make a post here, someone here is going to think you are talking about them even if you don't know them personally and never even heard of them.

It's like if someone posts online that there are lot of welfare queens, someone is going to assume it is directed at them because they are on Welfare themselves even though they are not abusing it and can't find another job and have no way of moving but they have kids to support so that is what keeps them from being homeless.

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Pieplup
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30 Aug 2020, 4:15 pm

firemonkey wrote:

Judge how well a person is functioning based on their forum participation .

this is extremely true one of the most notable examples i can think of is EzraS. His posts are extremely well written and thought out but is on the middle of the spectrum. He requires alot of assistance in his day to day life. I find alot of people in the autism community (not just on this forum) think because they can get along with life well enough other people can too.

League_Girl wrote:

Nades wrote:

This is true not just for the autistic community but for people in general.

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firemonkey
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30 Aug 2020, 4:49 pm

Nades wrote:

I applied it to my situation because I'm exactly the kind of person, but not the only person, who doesn't fit in with your myopic vision of things. Even if I hadn't been the person I am , and had been blessed with high manual and practical skill, your glib comments would still have remained glib and unhelpful.

Pieplup
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30 Aug 2020, 5:04 pm

firemonkey wrote:

Nades wrote:

That's true, most of the time people pointing out how you could do things better never really helps the situation. the best you can do is try to nudge them in the right direction by a little bit. i know when people have tried this approach with me it never ends well.

firemonkey
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30 Aug 2020, 5:15 pm

It's only been since moving here in 2017, and with input from my stepdaughter, that it's been recognised at all that I struggle with certain things .

An excellent article

Pieplup
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30 Aug 2020, 5:50 pm

firemonkey wrote:

It's only been since moving here in 2017, and with input from my stepdaughter, that it's been recognised at all that I struggle with certain things .

An excellent article

I dont' think intelligence scores predict success among anyone. I know i'd be better of if i had a lower iq. cause i'm constantly searching for a way to get better and it often backfires. The problem is that In always doing it myself regardless and never asking for help when i need it i ultimately ended up burning out and not being able to do it regardless.

Nades
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30 Aug 2020, 10:23 pm

firemonkey wrote:

Nades wrote:

The post I made that angered you was relating to a friend who was in her 30s who refused to learn to drive a car or even take a basic moped licence despite in my opinion clearly being able to do so. It's not just me that though that about her, other mutual autistic friends also thought the same about her and one refused to speak to her ever again because of her "wanting someone to look after her" to quote him word for word. There were also concerns raised by NT people about her possibly over egging her aspergers for sympathy.

That woman is not you and I don't know why you took that anecdote about her so personally. Perhaps you can relate to her to an extent but she is still not you and it never was supposed to be about you.

It's actually strikes me as bitterly ironic how many nerves the thread has hit considering it's context.

League_Girl
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30 Aug 2020, 10:37 pm

Nades wrote:

firemonkey wrote:

Nades wrote:

In your OP in your thread, you didn't make it clear you were talking about that one person.

I knew someone who also refused to drive and always made excuses and thought it would be cheaper if I just took him everywhere. He didn't want to pay for gas and didn't want to pay for car maintenance and he was very bad with money, he never wanted to save it for emergencies or for bills, he just wanted to spend it on stuff he wanted. Guess why he is my ex?

I really hate people like that. There is a difference in not driving because you can't afford it and because you are not able to than choosing not to because you don't want to pay the money for it. Plus, those who are not able to drive are very limited on when they can leave their house and when they can go somewhere because they have to be on other peoples schedule for when they can take them. I had an online friend who would walk two miles to work and back. He even did it in the snow and thunderstorms. He never relied on anyone to take him. He wasn't going to expect others to live on his work schedule.

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firemonkey
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31 Aug 2020, 12:51 am

Nades wrote:

firemonkey wrote:

Nades wrote:

Angered is not the right word to use. Annoyed with you- yes . Given your inability to see why your post could upset people I'm going to refrain from replying further to you.

ASPartOfMe
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31 Aug 2020, 4:49 am

On a forum there is no non verbal communication to misintemperate.

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