not wanting to talk

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Does anybody else here really hate going out in public...especially purchasing something for yourself?
I don't like seeing the same person more than twice ever because I'm afraid they might talk to me...so I really hate going to the gas station or a convenience store...so much where I'll have a fit over it and try and make other people go in for me...so much as to deprive myself of something I need.
When I'm buying clothes I can feel people in line behind me thinking.."oh your buying that ugh"..or the person ringing me up thinking..."what stupid clothes or what a stupid purchase."
or when I buy tampons I get extremely embarrassed and always feel like people are revolted by the purchase like "this thing bleeds, how unnatural!"
So needless to say if all the commotion of having a lot of people doesn't bother me when I'm out the thoughts I implant or that other people are actually possibly thinking bother me to no end.

I hate getting my hair cut because the hair dresser always wants to make idle chitchat. I also hate having longish hair, I like it cropped and clean cut, talk about a catch 22.

The main reason that I love my meds.

Going out and doing things does bother me. I force myself to go and do things by myself, even though I would prefer to have someone with me to fend of the chatty people.

All of my barbers are hairdressers. I ignore them and they just ramble on anyways.

I also try to ignore people in waiting rooms and in the line to check out. If I must say something it comes out as a mumble or sounds like I am being mean or rude. If I see someone again and they want to be chatty all they normally get from me is a mumbled "heh" as I walk by.

Bundens, I think you need to practice positive self-talk in the mirror. Try implanting thoughts in other peoples minds of you having great taste in clothes and other items. Remember, normal women buy feminine products, and everyone buys toilet paper (except the disgusting people).

I know I hate talking in shops and have thought about how people judge me by what I buy even if what I buy is just regular things. But that was a long time ago I dont go to shops nomore and I rarely talk to people at all now so I order groceries online. That saves a lot of hassle.

Mostly I'm okay with it until cashiers start discussing my purchases. The most recent example of this was when I was buying a bunch of those Gerber toddler meals (my son is autistic and has major issues with food textures, that's all he would eat for a while). The cashier said, "Wow. Someone like's Gerber dinners huh? Man these are expensive! Do you know you spent about $40 on these?" I told her yes, but it's all he would eat right then. She said, "I'd tell that kid he could eat whatever I made the rest of us." I finally said, "Sorry, I didn't know you were an expert on autistic children who have sensory issues with food. Do you have any other advice for me?"

It depends on the day for me. Some days I just get stuff done, other days I will live on a can of fruit and some fritos because that is all that is in the house and I don't want to see other people enough to just live on those things.

Some days I go to the store and say hey to everyone there and smile at them, then go on my merry way. (I get strange looks at times for this, but it is almost compulsive.) Some days I stare at the floor and hope no one notices me.

Buying tampons doesn't bother me too much, at least not anymore. If they have an issue I just stare down the cashier, or just stare solidly at the floor. (depends on the day.)

Funnyish story though: i was working as a cashier at a large store. The guy had a bag of pistachios, and when i rung out candy i would always ask the parents if their children would like to hold the candy. Well, I rang up the guy's pistachios, and asked him: "Would you like to hold your nuts?" Oh my goodness, his friend burst out with laughter, and I am pretty sure I turned a lovely shade of red.

Silence is golden topic

I know. I find idle chitchat totally surperfluous, but at my age I have learned to deal with those who try. I just smile tightly and shrug and say "it is possible." Retail workers are instructed to talk to customers to increase sales. I have had to do this as well, but NTs like when you recognize them and tend to buy something. It does not work for me, and I do find it annoying when they keep bugging me. Again I smile tightly, shrug and say "it is possible." End of conversation. I think it works better for me because I am not young, look poor and probably am not interested in the lastest fad, gadget or food item. I am not a sales target.

That cashier in the grocery store ringing in the jarred baby food was uncommonly probing. I would have asked prointedly: "Is there a problem?" and that usually ends it. She might have thought you had a set of multiples, like triplets and more. NTs are usually fascinated by babies and even I find them sort of cut, having had three children. But at any rate, annoying people are usually best dealt with using silence.

[quote="bundens"]Does anybody else here really hate going out in public...especially purchasing something for yourself?

This is why God invented online shopping.

I just pretend to listen. Pretending to be interested is much more difficult though, but not undoable.

I've learned to deal with this type of thing but I still don't like it. It also depends on my mood like some other people were saying. The one thing that I really don't like is when I walk into a store and a salesperson asks me if I need help. Sometimes I will not even enter a store if I see those people hovering near the front door. What I now do to avoid having them follow me around the store is just answer them with a curt NO, not smile and not look at them. That usually stops them. I used to be all polite and smile and say no thank you and then they would just ask me again three minutes later.

I've adapted over the years to going out in public. But I still feel a bit paranoid about buying things and seeing people I know. There are some days, however, when I am in a good mood and love going to Wal*Mart just to look around.

Yes and no.

I enjoy talking to people whom I might be interested in, that is the only reason I go out by telling myself "You might find someone you like." Usually I'm incorrect, but at least it gets me away from the house.

To people whom I'm not interested in talking to I appear as an a**hole. I don't intend to, it's just that the situation does not call for it. I still smile but that's it.