Social simplification?

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While I was growing up, all of my friends and classmates were NT. I remember, when I was younger(age 7-9),I was the "little professor" we all know or have heard about. I remember, how I began to feel different, from everyone else. My intelligence seemed to alienate me, from the others.

Thinking back to 3rd or 4th grade, I remember when I started 'simplifying' my thoughts, in order to blend in, and to gain acceptance of others. It felt good to be accepted. I didn't know that I had AS, and frankly, didn't know what was wrong with me. My mother would re-assure me that, I was just 'shy' and I would grow out of it.

So, I continued simplifying my thoughts, throughout high school. By graduation, I was somebody, I didn't even know. I was accepted by druggies and rough-necks, so, I became one of them. I was so used to 'editing' myself that, it became very natural. I was reduced to being a drug addict and alcoholic, and I lived like this until about age 30.

I've been clean for 3+ years, and now, I know that I have AS. I still find myself, constantly simplifying my thoughts, in order to blend in and not, draw attention to myself. I find it hard to elaborate on anything, except my few obsessions. It's like, I try to end a conversation, before it has even started. I guess, I'm just not interested in what other people have to say. Of course, there are exceptions. Anyone else do this 'simplifying'?

I can see where your coming from, I feel pretty much the same way, I used to sit in a corner reading encyclopedias whilst all the other kids were reading nursery stories still, this got me names like "nature freak" etc, so I spose I subconsiously subdued my intelegence in order to gain acceptence among my peers. I turned to destructive means to fit in at school like fights, stealing, petty stuff really, but not really fitting to my interlectual capabilities. I spose we all to it to a certain extent, even NT's.

Yeah, I am afraid to elaborate because then I will seem weird or I might say something wrong. With my parents I am scared to say anything sometimes because my mom jumps on and attacks alot of stuff I say even if it is trying to agree. But yeah, I don't want to go into the time to explain things, it takes to long and I know that they really don't care and they are doing that thing where they ask little questions to give the appearence of being interested in you, but they just want you to give a short answer. I might elaborate if the other person is obviously interested in the subject I want to elaborate on, those people make good friends. Me and my friend call these kinds of talks "nerd outs" haha.

I can understand that. I'd often not talk about the things I wanted to talk about because people would think the way I think is weird or I knew they wouldn't understand. I often get frustrated at what seems to be so obvious to me but is not to other people. In my writing I've found that those ideas people think are totally weird or just don't get are a writer's best tools and people tell me that my writing's 'brilliant' (don't mean to sound bigheaded!) and a unique voice that they haven't heard. My lecturer's at uni really liked it.

I went through a stage where I thought if I drink alot of alcohol it would make me dumber and I'd fit in - well, that was probably the dumbest thing anyone could have done!

On the funny side, I once told a girl at work that the longest English word in the Guiness Book of Records is floccipaucinihilipilification and the longest disease pneumonultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconioses - Not sure the spelling is right!

She just gave me the strangest look as in you are so weird and couldn't get away fast enough!

Simplification? Hell no! It makes my brain hurt, and heaven forbid I suffer for simpletons. If the anthropoids don't like my attitude, then that's their loss. At least the neanderthals could make tools and fix things. Some of the people I've had the misfortune of meeting called themselves mechanics but couldn't fix a sandwich. The only tool they could use was the one between their legs. Pathetic! Guys, we have a gift, and we shouldn't be ashamed to let it show. Sure it might alienate me at times, but I've always asserted that choosing my own path is better than fitting in for no reason other than fitting in. And that's how I no that my friends are true friends, by not acting like I'm ret*d. Intellect is superior.