Voice regulation

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I wasn't sure which forum to put this in.

Does anybody have trouble with regulation of their voice volume & tone? I have no idea of my voice volume (I have perfect hearing) and sometimes my tone is inappropriate for the situation, such as people say I sound angry when I'm trying to make a joke, or I sound happy when talking about sad things, or I sound sad for no reason. Is this common? How do I stop this problem?

The people close to me always comment on how sometimes it seems like my voice sounds like I don't care, or I'm sad, or something. It's usually completely off of how I think I'm sounding and how I'm feeling. It sucks cause sometimes I'm trying to patch things up with someone and saying sorry and they don't take me seriously because they think I sound like I don't care at all. I have no idea how to change it

I'm also always being told that I'm too quiet or too loud

I can't say how common it is, but I know it's something I struggle with a lot.

It's called "Voice prosody". I have a problem with that too... I speak too loudly and don't realize it... people have told me I'm talking "at them" instead of "To them". Some think I must purposely talk at them that way as to purposely be rude.. .I have suffered greatly because of that. I have been so misunderstood as a human being, and wrongly punished because of it.. I, too, wish there was something I could do about that problem..

I'm distracted by other sounds I think... I'm not sure, but I think that's why I end up talking louder.. like in a restaurant or bar... I've noticed the same thing when there is a fan blowing and I have to turn up the tv to here past the distracting fan... Other people aren't bothered by it and don't have to turn up the tv... I wonder I might feel as though my voice has to be turned up in order to hear myself over all the other distracting noises in a room... ? Someone who is hard of hearing will speak louder themselves.... maybe it is something like that.. being distracted by all the stimuli in a room.. just a theory.. Maybe there is a way to improve on the voice prosody problems... If there's a way, I'd like to know about it

I try to be aware of it, but sometimes, especially when I get excited about some subject or I think distracted by other noises, I start talking louder.. I'm not aware of speaking louder and sometimes faster too.. I try to be consciously aware of this.. especially in restaurants now...

I have noticed that my mother has EXACTLY the same problem and I think we may both be on the spectrum to a certain extent... I have gotten diagnosed and know that I am on the spectrum, but am not sure about her.. I think it probably is hereditary. "Voice Prosody" problems are quite common in autistic spectrum disorders, so it probably isn't a learned bad habit.... I'm not sure what causes it or how to fix the problem... Maybe the person that thinks I'm speaking too loudly has given some subtle cue that I should speak more quietly, and I have missed it until they get irritated.. since I miss a large percentage of nonverbal communication..

My voice is somber, quiet, and very very deep. It doesn't help that I have a weird (apparently British) inflection and a strange speech rhythm. The only bad part about it is having to repeat myself alot

I always start yelling when I'm talking about something that I'm excited about, but never realize it. It doesn't matter how many times someone tells me to calm down, I just can't keep quiet.

Other times, around people I don't know, I talk so quiet they cannot hear me a lot of the time, but I don't realize I'm doing it until it is pointed out to me.

wish i had a volume button like on my pc

This is a COMMON problem with people with AS. I have this also.

I'm constantly being told that I'm talking to loudly for the situation. My hearing is fine too but I don't realize how loud I'm being. It happens a lot when I'm about someone else and they're near me unfortunately. I get yelled at for being too loud and I'm always like "I'm sure they can't hear me." Oops!

lol, my son does it too. We are always mentioning volume to try to help him become a bit more aware, but it doesn't help when I'm yelling "watch your volume, I'm right next to you" without realizing it, lol.

It's also kind of funny, when he does go to watch his volume, and tries to repeat something, he says it even louder but shortens the sentence XD I used to do that when I was little, too.

When I get stressed I have a tendency to talk in a lot higher pitch then i normally do. Drives my mom up the wall. Often when I get in an argument with my mom, I'll go from regular pitch to the high pitched voice, and continue the argument at that pitch. Then again I also sarcastically use with my mom for fun.

When i get excited i tend to talk fast. When talking about my special interests, i tend to repeat what I've said a few times so the person understands what I've said.

This reminds me of something that happened last week.

I was at a SubWay restaurant with my nana and my cousin. My cousin and I were eating subway but my nana wasn't. She asked my cousin if she could have a bite of his and said..."I've never had subway before,".
I said..."What!, you've never had subway!?".
and then my nana goes..."SHHHH!...i'm right next to you,".

I didn't realize what she was talking about until I looked around and saw everyone looking at me and realized that they had all heard what I said.

I often talk too loudly in any given situation without trying to...I don't know why, it just comes out that way.
I've also been told that I talk too "proper". I see nothing wrong with this though.

I have problems regulating not only the volume and tone of my voice at times, but the speed. I often talk too fast and start to blur my words together.

My voice and my mind: never the twain shall meet.

I can regulate it under normal circumstances, likesay, interracting with my parents....talking to Flakey....but I can get excited and then my voice gets really loud and goes up a few otaves it seems.