Stimming...

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I know, widely covered, plenty of resource etc. But before you get your silk knickers in a twist, here me out...

I am currently self diagnosing myself as an Aspie. Last year someone mentioned I might be, but then after finding out about it a lot (obsessed even. I should have noticed the signs then), I discovered I might not be, because I hardly ever 'Stim'. Or so I thought...

After really delving into this, I was noticing I do stuff that other people do not... I stroke my beard for example. A lot. I bend one of my toes under my foot. I pick hairs from my beard also.

I also exhibit a brief hand flap when I am excited. I done this once at work (and many other times, but I rarely do it in public)because I knew what was in a parcel. Before I opened it... flapity flap.

I also show most of this on this page here:

http://www.creative-minds.info/index_files/Stimming.htm

But am still confused. I thought everyone drums their fingers, or click pens. I must admit, my drumming is very rhythmic. I also like to tap my fingers onto my thumb in a complex pattern. I actually now have a long list of behaviour that I do which I thought was 'normal'. (Hate the expression normal)

Please do not be harsh on me, as I know the subject of stimming is covered many many times, however, I would just like to know the difference between doing this subconsciously and otherwise, and whether it means the same thing.

Many thanks,

Al.

You'll find people here who will tell you breathing funny is a stim. By definition 'self-stimulating' could be interpreted as almost anything - however, in the case of Autism, it is something that combats being overwhelmed by sensory overload, and if you have such a stim, then you're being overwhelmed by sensory input on a regular basis. It's the constant state of low-level anxiety that causes the Autistic stim.

The question is, is there some repetitive movement that you engage in, that - were you to stop for more than a few moments - would lead to such a buildup of anxiety and agitation that you would find yourself at wits' end and start to melt down? I've been in near constant motion for so long, it took me some time after diagnosis to realize why I did it. I'd been doing it for as long as I could remember and can't stop for more than a minute or so even when people get irritated with me about it. The only time the stim stops is when I'm intently focused on doing something, then the object of focus substitutes for the stim by distracting me from my normal level of tension and stress.

Contrary to what many here will tell you, I do not believe that chewing fingernails and twirling hair etc, are stims in any sense of being related to Autism. Millions of people do those things who have no discernible neurological disorder.

Bullfrog, listen to Willard; he is a wise man.

I liked that article, I do most of the stims listed.
Like what Willard said, they're not just habits that I can just stop when I feel like it.
It's like a constant thing, especially when in a conversation. I've got to be doing some sort of self stimulating thing to keep me going, it's weird, it's almost like I use my fiddling/chewing/leg bouncing etc to make sure the conversation flows. I'd go round the bend if I couldn't move around some how. I can't concentrate too good in class if I'm not doodling compulsively or chewing my pen. Other stims keep me occupied and entertained, making noises and talking to oneself helps to pass time (when alone) and waiting for something. I bounce my foot all the time pretty much because it just feels good and if you tell me to stop, I can't stop for long and seconds later I'm bouncing again. Tell me to stop feeling/chewing/ripping things and I'm staring at that object just itching to start chewing it again, and I usually do.
Also they are a good outlet for feelings of extreme excitement, if I'm hyper then I have a way to release it, by moving around a lot and makig daft noises.

Cheers guys. I am off work for a bit, and a lot of stuff that I do happens there. I will take a look at myself and how I behave around people and what I do to cure my anxiety.

I suck at eye contact btw. Everyone always thinks I am a shifty bugger.

One thing I do notice (retrospectively) is how I can sometimes act like a child at work. By that I mean, when I am bored, or even stressed, pretending to be an airplane or similar childish activities. I also pace up and down the shop.

Also, after a day, I need to come home and just chill for an hour away from anyone else. I need to really concentrate at work at things other people will find natural. Like having a conversation, or not getting distracted.

Anywho, thanks for your advice. I shall keep you all posted.

Yours,

Al.