Is watching youself in the mirror a common aspie trait?

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whateveryousay2007
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20 Nov 2007, 11:30 am

My 8 year old has to constantly look at a mirror or at his reflection in a window when he's talking to people. He's always staring at himself in the mirror. Is that something odd? He's been doing it for about a year!



Kitsy
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20 Nov 2007, 11:32 am

You are asking people who are considered odd in society to answer if it's odd?

I personally don't think it's odd but maybe you do? Ask him what he's thinking about or if he's daydreaming.


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whateveryousay2007
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20 Nov 2007, 11:37 am

I wasn't trying to offend anyone. Just curious why he's always watching himself when he talks to people. Avoiding eye contact? I don't know. Always overly expressive with his face when he talks.

He watches himself in Taekwondo class instead of looking ahead at what he's supposed to be kicking and so on. I didn't know if it's a little boy thing or just him.



alei
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20 Nov 2007, 11:37 am

Personally I am so uncomfortable with eye contact that I rarely see my own face in the mirror. My brother on the other hand, who is also on the spectrum, spends hours in front of the mirror, either talking on the phone or just making faces at himself. Its interesting to note that he is much better with socializing and presenting the proper social cues to emphasize what he is saying than I am. Maybe there is a connection. Practice makes perfect?


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whateveryousay2007
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20 Nov 2007, 11:41 am

I don't know. Whenever someone says something to him about it (i.e. his Taekwondo instructor) he'll blurt out I was not. I don't know if he does it just to see how he looks doing something but he is drawn to himself in the mirror.

He doesn't do it at home. ONLY at TKD class. Mine socializes with people he knows and people he doesn't. But....it has to be something that he's keen on to do it. But....he won't make eye contact.

With me he will but only for a moment.



Kitsy
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20 Nov 2007, 11:44 am

I think Alei is right. It could be that he is trying to learn how to present himself.


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alei
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20 Nov 2007, 11:45 am

whateveryousay2007 wrote:
I don't know. Whenever someone says something to him about it (i.e. his Taekwondo instructor) he'll blurt out I was not. I don't know if he does it just to see how he looks doing something but he is drawn to himself in the mirror.

He doesn't do it at home. ONLY at TKD class. Mine socializes with people he knows and people he doesn't. But....it has to be something that he's keen on to do it. But....he won't make eye contact.

With me he will but only for a moment.


Sounds very much like my brother as a kid. Right down to the socializing. I think that he watched himself, and continues to do so, to make sure his facial features are accurate.

You say he only does this in TKD, could that be due to the availability of the mirrors?


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whateveryousay2007
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20 Nov 2007, 11:51 am

Maybe....

I feel bad picking out habits that my child has for someone else to analize him. But....the school won't help him without a "proper diagnosis". So I was told to list any ritual habits he has.

Is it wrong to do that? He doesn't know that I'm making a list....I don't want him to feel self conscience about anything he does. But I really don't know what else to do.



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20 Nov 2007, 11:51 am

I like looking at myself in the mirror a lot. Every time I pass by one, I've got to look at myself. I'm not sure why my face is so fascinating, but it is.



whateveryousay2007
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20 Nov 2007, 11:53 am

He does it to! And he makes a point to over express his facial expressions. He makes normal expressions when he's talking to people directly. BUT if a mirror is available he will make a "go to hell" face even though he's talking normal.



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20 Nov 2007, 1:29 pm

IMO - I do think that looking at or studying one's self in the mirror may well be an Aspie trait. If you consider that people on the spectrum tend to be introverted and live more inside their heads than outside. A self image may be hard for an Aspie to visualize, and since mind seems to be more dominant than body, a reflected image of the self would be reassuring. "Ah, so that's what I look like" or "Aha, so I'm still here". Someone with identity problems would find security in the stability of their own reflection. I am speaking here from personal experience, but I feel that my explanation accurately describes why I am attracted to my reflection. It's not a far stretch to imagine that others with the same mind set would do the same. I think it has little to do with vanity or narcissism.



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20 Nov 2007, 1:49 pm

whateveryousay2007 wrote:
He does it to! And he makes a point to over express his facial expressions. He makes normal expressions when he's talking to people directly. BUT if a mirror is available he will make a "go to hell" face even though he's talking normal.


I like making weird faces in the mirror too.



skrimpy
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20 Nov 2007, 1:56 pm

I will watch my reflection rather than the person I'm talking to if I'm near something with a reflective surface.



rushfanatic
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20 Nov 2007, 2:13 pm

I am incredibly uncomfortable looking in mirrors, even though I am soft on the eyes.Cannot , will not look when I am in public restrooms and others are looking at themselves..Not of shame, it just doesn't feel right....



richardbenson
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20 Nov 2007, 2:37 pm

i love it



JustSteph
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20 Nov 2007, 2:41 pm

rushfanatic wrote:
I am incredibly uncomfortable looking in mirrors, even though I am soft on the eyes.Cannot , will not look when I am in public restrooms and others are looking at themselves..Not of shame, it just doesn't feel right....


It's the same for me
I only ever look in the mirror to put my contact lenses in