awaiting diagnosis- general questions.

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hi- im mid 30s, and awaiting diagnosis, after researching autism and then aspreger's recently, re something on tv about ultra senativity to light and noise being linked to autism. i have been diagnosed as having a personality disorder- which is aparently often confused with asp's...
so- i have a few questions...
firstly- ive been out of work for years, a major reason being that i find it physically dificult to be physically near people. it's REALLY hard to explain- it becomes draining, and makes me stressed and annoyed, eventually depressed. ive heard that other people w asp's etc have similar experiances; HOW DO THEY COPE???? what % of people w asp's are in work??
i find going away with someone for a weekend about the limit of my endurance; it provokes the same reaction as i have to noise, and sensations i dislike.
QED this makes life complex- and as things are, it would be impossible for me to marry, as i need so much space to physically apart from other people.
is this common?? even its is freakishly rare- any adivice?

i also have problems with frustration/anger- and feel unreasonably annoyed that the things i encounter do not work in a logical, or simple, or smooth way. i find change REALLY hard to deal with ('we fear change')- eg- my local supermarket -damn you camden sainsbury's- has changed it's isles about TWICE in a few months.
this again is hard to explain- its not a petty truculance, or arrogance; its more that i have set vague road maps in my mind for situations and any deviation from this causes- um- utter confusion.
this agin is frustrating as i have well above normal inteligence, but realise my analysis is illogical and unreasonable; but am unable to change.
any help welcome... ;-)

I was just diagnosed last week. The Psychiatrist I used had experience with the Autism Spectrum. Try to get one that has the background to recognize it. Others may have better advice. Hope it works out for you.

you sound exactly like me i've never successfully managed to work at all, extremely oversensitive to noise and light too

relationships are a total nightmare, i cant be physically around someone else for more than a day before going crazy, i really need my own space going to stay with someone just leaves me feeling depressed and emotionally drained. unfortunately i am not coping well with not being in a relationship either, i need emotional connection to survive

i suffer a lot of frustration too, especially at other people doing things illogically (or 'normally' as they call it! ) and there should be a law against supermarkets changing their layouts!! !

anyway welcome to wp.

Welcome to WP!

thanks diva and velo! thuogh it's trite and predictable, its SO GOOD to know im not alone!! !
shrinks have told me that im simply not trying,and just benig dificult- im really angry that none of them thught of autism. i even asked one, who pooh-poohed it, since i can empathise with others, and am erudite.
but i really hate being around other people! and hate light touch! and niose! and light! and my parents used to force fed me because i wouldnt eat most foods! mild dislexia, profound discalculia! often avoids eye contact! ive been saying all this for years, and i cant believe its taken 34 years for me, by chance, to find this out!

anyway, though i was initially elated to find out about asp's, it will make little diference in all probability, as things in my life are generally so bleak that unless it dramatically improves i am plannig to kill myself in septemeber. i have to move out from my housning assoc flat into a council studio flat; i have EXTREME claustrophobia. i have no friends at all, as im too ashamed to see anyone; everyone thinks there is nothing wrong with me, and that im just being dificult etc. i have never told my parents im ill, and out of work, and have lied that i have a good job. i have asked for help for years from different docs, who now only want to medicate me, and even told me 'its a waste of money tratnig you- the money can be better spent elsewhere'. i joined a new surgery this week and the nurse advised me to see a harley street specialist (- clealry assumes sick bens rather more generaous than they are), etc. doc was ok, but foreign, and i had trouble listening to what she was saying, so im not sure exactly where im being sent for diagnosis...
all my old friends are married,and having children, and paying the higher rate of tax, buying houses. and i am still alone and crying to the smiths like i was doing 22 years ago.

"...shrinks have told me that im simply not trying,and just benig dificult- im really angry that none of them thught of autism. i even asked one, who pooh-poohed it, since i can empathise with others, and am erudite. "

You are not getting the proper care. You need to find a psychologist/therapist that will help you not judge you.

Do you belong to a church? Sometimes, there is therapist, minister, priest--someone who can help you for free!

You sound very depressed and it seems as if you might require antidepressents just to get you on your feet so you can think more clearly.

Are you taking meds?

I'm very anti-med myself, but realize that with clinical depression, it is absolutely necessary and has saved many lives.

This sounds like it's outside of your ability to manage it. If you tell someone you are planning to kill yourself, they will take action. Please be honest and do whatever you have to do to make yourself better.

Don't blame yourself. Your mental health is not your fault. Any therapist/psych that suggests this is ridiculously off the mark.

equinn

that sounds horrible, all you've had to go through and are still going through but its quite common for people with AS to be diagnosed late and have a long history of misdiagnosis from ignorant psychiatrists and doctors. i have had a few myself, my favourite has to be 'obsessional slowness' (the irony being that i was on a waiting list for over a year before i got it!) one shrink told my mum that all my problems were her fault and that she was smothering me, i also got labelled with personality disorders and put on all sorts of pills

i know what a stress housing worries can be too, i'm still living at home but really have to move out before my parents get much older... but the worry of moving out is making me suicidal... i was atually supposed to move out a few months ago, but got so worked up with the stress of looking at places and all that, i was all set to just kill myself... ended up on pills again and just having to forget about moving out and independent living for now

sounds like a very difficult situation with your parents, were they supportive when you were younger? do you have any brothers or sisters you can talk to?

i just had to give up on facebook because i was getting so depressed every time i went on, seeing how successful everyone else was, having kids and buying houses and jobs, while i have nobody and nothing it just makes me feel so small.

sorry this message is so depressing we should try and talk about nicer things! do you have any hobbies and interests, what do/would you like to spend your time doing?