Remain calm, cool, collected.

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Whenever I'm in a conflict with another person, I never let my emotions guide my actions. I never yell, curse, call nasty names, or act violently towards that person. Even if that person is yelling and screaming at me, I don't reciprocate their behaviour.
I'm not saying that I never feel angry. And I'm not saying that I hold in my feelings. I do feel angry, but I express it in a calm, harmless manner. I just describe exactly how I feel and what is making me feel that way. Like, "I am feeling very frustrated because your clothes are here on the floor, yet the dirty laundry hamper is just a few feet away."

For some odd reason, people seem to hate this. People seem to want me to yell, scream, hit, cuss, just lose control in a moment of anger. They say things like, "You think you are so better than everyone else? You think you are superior?" "You're an emotionless freak." "Why can't you be normal, like everyone else?"


But I don't see the problem with staying nice and calm. What is the point in yelling if the person is in the same room as I am, and he/she can hear me perfectly fine if I speak in a normal volume? What is the point in calling nasty names, when addressing the person by their own name works just fine? Why act violently in a verbal dispute? What would that solve?

Does anyone else face a similar problem?

This is me 99% of the time.

I usually only have meltdowns once every 6 months now.

Yup! I am quite dangerous when I can stay calm like that. If I were to tell a friend's mom that she's a stupid b***h, she could take it. Calmly telling said friend's mom that she is ignoring her daughter's potential by treating her as though she is incapable of doing anything for herself? Not so much. Apparently it hits harder when it's obvious you are rational and in control. (My friend, incidentally, has partial hemiplegia thanks to a childhood stroke, and is quite capable of doing things like cutting her own food and tying her shoes... which her mom is still doing for her... and on top of it her mom gets mad at her when she doesn't do things for herself. Yeah, way to set a double standard.)

Hmm, I actually figured as much.
Some people don't like to take responsibility for their own actions, either. Often, they will say, "You made me (insert angry action, such as yell, here)!"
And I reply, "Uhmm... how did I make you do anything? Did I put a gun to your head? Did I physically force you? No, not at all. You, yourself are choosing to (yell, hit, or etc.)."

Usally, this either shuts the other person up, or gets the person madder.