"Invisible Teasing"

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From late elementary school to this day, whenever I am frustrated with something in particular, or just plain-out stressed, I feel like there are invisible imaginary people or voices teasing me over and over again, and it makes me ready to have a meltdown, although I try to endure it instead so I don't break anything. Can anyone on this board relate to this scenario?

YES!
It's almost like you can hear them isn't it?

It's your inner critic, benzos seem to silence him/her pretty well

Yes, and my Jungian analyst told me to say, "I don't have to listen to you" - it worked!

That sounds a little like paranoid schizophrenia. Do you have any other symptoms of paranoid schizophrenia?

hmm, OH YA! dude, like u feel u can just feel that sense of hate around u? like accept its an actual person. u know that he or she is saying bad things bout u and it tears u up inside?

I hear myself saying terrible things about me.

Then again, I have clinical depression.

We all have what some call an "inner voice"... I have a feeling that's what it is.. OR it could be a memory from an abusive situation where you were being verbally attacked...

It is possible that because you have received so much criticism in life from parents and other people because of your neurological differences (being on the autistic spectrum), that you have internalized this criticism.. so that you are especially hard on yourself when you make a mistake.. You might generally dislike yourself because of all the lifetime of criticism from people who don't understand.. I have a feeling alot of people here have that issue...

Actually, quite a few neurotypical people have a similar problem too because they were raised by overly harsh parents or abusive alcoholics, etc... Some people refer to it as "the committee in my head"... an expression representing a collection of criticisms from all the negative people you've encountered in your life... When you get frustrated with life or with yourself, or depressed, these negative thoughts and overly harsh self-criticisms tend to come to the surface more. THey come from your own inner voice because you believed the criticisms you have heard so much and these beliefs have become internalized into your psyche... I have a feeling that's what it is in your case... Although, it could be some type of memory of verbal criticisms that comes to the surface similar to Post traumatic stress disorder.... Either way, hopefully if this happens again, you can be easier on yourself and please understand that you don't deserve this type of cruelty. Therapy could be really beneficial for you.

Someone mentioned that they thought it could be schizophrenia... like you might be having hallucinations.. If it is the same type of thing every time though, then I doubt it's hallucination.. Do you ever hear other types of sounds or possibly instructions from people that aren't there, etc? or is it always criticism seeming to come from numerous people at once when you're under alot of stress or angry with yourself? If it's really vivid and always a similar thing, it might be like a traumatic memory.. PTSD.. like a flashback from your memory that you blocked but it resurfaces when your stressed... ?

L

i know what you mean
it's like you know in your head
that they are talking about you
in some demeaning manner.

i can't stand those situations,
often times i try to defend myself
when it's a group setting because
i think they may be thinking of me
already in a certain way, and only
ending up making a fool of myself.

that is why i don't like human interaction
that much...too much drama

It is just your instincts talking to you.

Your instincts (social and individual) will always be at odds with each other, and you are likely to end up their tool if you give them half a chance.

As it happens though... my "social instinct" is lazy and indifferent, though quite insightful sometimes when she wants to be. She doesn't care much for her role, which helps me immensely. The thing is... I know it is a ploy, as she is manipulating me in VERY subtle ways... but I resist where I can, and she won't take it personally.
My "individual instinct" is a vicious, sadomasochistic psychopath.... well beyond my own mere relatively mild sociopathy. He seems to care about nothing more than inflicting unpleasantries on everyone, myself included. He berrates me, rather as you get berrated yourself..... but it is usually regarding why I don't have more battle-scars.... or why so-and-so a person who wronged me still has all their limbs intact. I try to ignore him generally, as his suggestions are usually outrageous and counter-productive to my own ends (e.g. killing and maiming sprees, arson, etc).

Soticoto!! have you considered a career in comedy!

I have an inner editor that wnats me to act in certain correct ways. Now that I am older I can recognise it and cast off its chains.