I used to think...

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...it was better that nobody knew I was a high functioning autistic. Up until recently I pretty much told no one. I'd just rather my family, friends, colleagues and co-workers just thought I was a dork, or a spaz, or an arrogant know-it-all because to me that seemed better than being looked down upon or pitied because I had this problem. I'd rather people think I was a jerk than borderline ret*d.

...But recently I've been telling my friends I'm a high functioning autistic, letting them know exactly what the disorder entails. I tell them I don't mean to say or do stupid things, just sometimes I can't help myself. I also tell them to let me know if I did something wrong, and I'll sincerely try harder to fix it in the future. I don't try to make what I have an excuse. It only explains certain things I do, not all of them. Ultimately I'm the one in control.

...To my surprise, they've been very understanding and accomadating. It's gotten me on better terms with them. I've even gotten a girlfriend who's willing to work with me on it (she has some disorders too, of which I won't mention here, so she knows how it is) as long as i DO work on it, which I will. It's even become kind of an inside joke in my inner circle. I do something stupid they say "I'm gonna chalk that up to the autism" and I sarcastically reply "oh thanks".

...I dunno, maybe it's just better to be open and honest about who you are is all I'm saying

I still think that it is better to keep my business to myself but I think its cool for you to let others know if it makes you feel better. I hope it doesn't bite you in the ass.

Only my most important family members know. I was kind of forced into telling one of my neighbors, because he wouldn't stop asking me why I run so much.

Asking sincerely for people to tell you what bugs them automatically puts them on your side, unless the person is a bully, and nothing works with a bully. You found a great way to handle things.

In my experience, family members will still think what they want to think of you, even with a diagnosis. When my wife was diagnosed ADD, her family just said, "You're not ADD; you're just lazy." With friends, it really depends upon who they are.
Co-workers? I'd rather just tell them about my Marfan and leave the Asperger's out of it.

i still think it depends on your personality
if people find you pleasant then it's ok
to be open to them.
in my case, even if i do get an official
diagnosis, after all the humiliation and
suffering i've endured with the "normal"
people i've met, i don't think it's wise
for me to go out in the open. it gives
more reason for them to attack me.
it's human nature to jump the weakest.
as it is i think people already perceive me
as weak that's why i get undermined all the'
time and laughed at.
they say i'm paranoid but then i always think
it's better be safe than sorry.

Congrats on having such understanding friends. Not all of us are that lucky.

I disagree with doing this. People don't want to think they are friends with mentally disabled people. (Yes, we are mentally disabled. I was diagnosed by one of the top autism clinics and was told I have mild mental retardation. Sorry folks, that is reality)

It is better to work on the problem yourself (self improvement) and start off fresh with new friends.

I think it's fabulous how people have reacted to you.

One in five people in the US have some form of mental illness, yet it has a huge stigma around it. Autism is seen as a mental illness plus nobody has ever heard of it and/or has some preconceived notion that is nowhere close to reality, so it's hard to disclose. I'm a nurse at a psych hospital and I am totally in the closet about my issues, for fear of losing respect, credibility or even my job.

While this is true, the vast majority of people with a mental illness have some form of mood disorder, such as depression, anxiety, or dysthmia.

I don't care how many degrees a person possesses, it does not make him or her omniscient. If i am "mentally ill", I will be the first to know. For centuries leprosy had those sorts of negative labels and stigmas that turned out to be all wrong. Actually, i'd love to take a poll here and see how many still think the same of it as people did in, say, the 19th century. I bet you do!

There is no telling yet whether this is "mental illness" or just an excess of certain personality traits for which there is not yet a cultural accommodation. I can't help but wonder if the sudden "rise in autism" is actually just a sudden recognition of a valid combination of personality, learning style and strength of beliefs brought on by technology and leisure that has made it possible to accommodate that combination to an unprecedented degree, thereby causing the 'problem'. Look at the "What is your Myer-Briggs personality type?", for example. Look at how many high IQs and professionals are on here. The rest of us may have other learning problems like Dyslexia but that does not constitute "mental illness" unless we're just degrading into semantics.

My NT spouse is very grateful that i am not like him (and vice versa) because i am the no-nonsense truth keeper. My perspective is not strong in the areas his is, and the reverse. I can 'see' what he cannot and he can 'see' what i cannot, and together we make a great team. My "otherly abled"ness gives me insight that he does not have and his people savvy does the same for me. The only reason that i am the one with a diagnosis, imho, is purely cultural.

As for what people think, who better to educate them than those who have earned their respect and trust. I think that is what Jamesohgoodie did and huzzah for it! On the practical level, with the situation we have presently, my plan is to tell only when and who necessary and with the right timing after people know me and my strengths.

I believe that Asperger's itself does not constitute "mental illness", though some of its co morbid conditions might. There is nothing ill about thinking differently.