The Middle Ground...

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it seems, in the past 5-10 years, i've either been a crying human wreck, or a completely egomaniacal monster, who treated everyone like s**t, but felt great!...i realise i was suffering with lots of depression, something i've just got out of....now it seems, i've finally hit the middle ground...

i feel confident, but not arrogant...i feel passionate about my beliefs....but open to debate and being proved wrong......i don't care what random people think of me....but care what my friends think.......i feel like a valued and confident young man....and much of my social anxiety has dissapated through simply going out there and talking to people, being around them, laughing. crying, rejoicing and listening....

so is this it? have i reaced emotional normality? humanity? is this what it feels like for everyone else...coz i gotta say, it feels pretty cool.

i dearly hope that any of my fellow aspies on a downward emotional spiral can get here, to where i stand on this day...and if you ever need anyone to rant at or any advice about how to talk and be around these here humans we have on earth (lol) then just IM me.

could be also a mild case of bipolar. Not an expert, but I did date one for a number of years...

but a positive attitude is a good thing. Glad you're feeling it.

I can't believe Im saying this here...but WTF

Yes, Xanderbeans, I experienced the same feelings as I went from my mid- to late 20's.

I think it's called developing a healthy sense of reality. I was nearly never equal to others in my view/my parents view/the world's view. I was way above or way below.....but given the choice I would have been equal.

It sounds like you are growing into your ideal. Did you ever wish for self-acceptance? You're probably getting it.

Just relax. As I said on another post tonight, just because you may feel like the other shoe will drop, doesn't mean it will.

Congrats.

I know how you feel, I felt the same way before I started taking anti-depressants. You feel miserable, so you make other people miserable, and then you feel guilty cause you made them miserable, and on it goes. I'm glad you've moved past that part of your life, it really is a sucky way to live.

i asked my girlfriend if she thought i was homosexual...she said "nah" XD

I never used to be able to do the middle ground thing either. So if there was a conflict, it always felt as if it could only go one of two ways - absolute victory or absolute defeat. It took me years to even realise there was a middle ground of negotiation, compromise, and looking for solutions. I wouldn't say I've got it completely sussed out yet, but well on the way I hope.

Even the best friendship in the world has elements of enmity.
Even the worst opponent has a part to play in your life for good.

Or, nobody's perfect, but monsters only exist in fancy.