Intolerance should be overcome

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That's what my NT mother said about me finding certain sounds annoying.
I can't help being annoyed by sounds. I'm hypersensitive to sounds.
Yesterday was horrible. I couldn't stand hearing someone chew, crumple up a paper bag or raise their voice. My hypersensitivity to touch was really bad too. There's no way I can tolerate something that feels uncomfortable on my skin and it's the same with noise.

If someone told you to get over your sensitive hearing how would you react?

I'd probably back down and apologize, but I'd be thinking something like 'why don't YOU overcome your intolerance to my sensitive hearing?' and then start being more careful what I complain about when talking to that person.

It's annoying when somebody demands that you be different than you actually are, just for their own convenience. It's disrespectful, IMO.

Does she not know much about Aspergers, that she's complaining about the symptoms?

No, I told her a lot about Asperger's and the symptoms I have. I thought I was quite clear on the hypersensitive issue.
It wasn't a personal attack on her either. I was just generally talking about my sensitive hearing. She probably thought it was because I cringe every time she eats, but I'd do that to anyone.
Every time I want people to understand me it just seems to backfire.

My gut reaction in that situation is to tell them where to stick it, but hopefully my brain travels faster than my mouth and I refrain from saying so.

On a good day, I'd understand that my hypersensitivity is something completely out of their experience. On a good day, I'd have the restraint to gently tell them that I physically can't "just get over it" and that to expect me to do is a pile of brown smelly stuff. That is, without... actually saying, pile of brown smelly stuff....

but anyway, notice that that's on a good day...

You just reminded me, one time I was eating some crackers and my father, who had just been sitting there reading the paper, suddenly turned to me and yelled "do you HAVE to eat so LOUD??! !" It still makes me laugh out loud 20 years later

i was given a lecture this morning on how humans aren't really hard-wired and how with practice I could really get better at making eye contact and participating in small-talk etc...if I really applied myself...instead of saying "I can't"...and while he had a point, I suppose, The lecture was still irritating, seeing as it was coming from a guy who can't even bring himself to brush his hair more frequently than once a month.

Anywhoo...there are certain things I have gotten somewhat desensitised to..like um...harsh noise frequencies...from having been exposed to them on a regular basis as a result of running a venue, and after a while I can sorta ignore the flourescent lights and function in areas that have them...but get me in a bank, and I don't know how to stop the feeling of wanting to jump out of my skin..

Haha, oh I cannot read when there is noise. My sister never understood this.
The worst thing for people to eat in front of me is rice crackers. Even imagining the sound is unbearable.
Although when I was younger to cope with the noise from people eating I would imagine the noise was something else. One person reminded me of crushing leaves and another sounded like a dog lapping water. I guess I could try that again.



I can't even begin to think of where to start when practicing small talk. It's not like I don't try, I hang out with a few people, but I'm not sure how I can get better at it. My mind just goes blank and I think of other things or focus on some object on a wall or table.

Last time I was near a fluorescent light I covered my eyes and begged for death. Well, maybe not the last part, but my sensitivity to light is so bad that I have to wear glasses. I'd do better with a pair of Irlen lenses but the tinted glasses just aren't my style. My reading glasses make everything look so much softer.

Last edited by pensieve on 02 Jan 2009, 1:00 am, edited 1 time in total.

When my partner is eating I simply find a convenient excuse not to be there anymore.
He used to take it very personally when I'd ask him to stop eating like a frickin' horse.
Now I don't say anything because the problem isn't with him, it's with me.

He also used to get annoyed when I'd get up in the middle of the night to re-make the bed (crumpled sheets drive me CRAZZZZZZY). Now he just sleeps through it.

It's all about compromise and picking your battles.

This is a very funny thread!

how do you remake the bed with him sleeping on it.

I live in a big warehouse with no windows and it can be pitch dark without the glaring oppressive flourescent lights in the main outer area. They beat down on me and scramble my brains...but I have gotten somewhat more used to living with them.

There needs to be sensitivty to your hypersensitivity. But...

It would do you good to follow the advice, in your own time and your own way.

I used to be really hypersensitive to certain textures. Over the years I have challenged myself and slowly desensitised myself to most of them. And it's a good thing to. Looking down, I can see that the fine roughness of the keys on my keyboard would have set my teeth on edge as a child if my finger nails were skidding across them. So, if I hadn't have confronted my bugbears and acclimatised myself to this environment, I might not be able to type these words to this forum.

In the long run, it's up to you to overcome your sensitivity to things. People trying to force you to do it, well, that can often have the opposite of the desired effect.

With great stealth.

HA! Too awesome. you are all awesome.

I once was taking a test, the last test I took before getting my private testing room, this boy had gotten his face punched and he was breathing through his bent and brutally swollen nose.

I was sitting and doing my best to ignore everyone and the time, just to try to clearly read a question in hopes of answering it. Weeeze.... lost concentration and tried to read it again, Weeeeze.. again, I had to refocus, weeeeze, oh my god, I had to read this question, Weeeze, I thought at this point, Would you please f*****g stop breathing. Alas, he did not stop breathing.

Happily, my teacher noticed my traumatic experience and I apologized for a possibly inaccurate test, for I was highly distracted. Last time she and I, took the private booth idea for granted.

"I'll come and shove sharp spikes into your ears while hitting you over the head with a hammer, and you get over that, okay?"