Books that condescend to Aspies/discriminate against us

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I got so mad when I read The Oasis Guide to Asperger Syndrome. It, as well as Helping A Child With Nonverbal Learning Disorder or Asperger's Syndrome, generalize, saying Aspies do this or don't do that.

I found 'Girls and Asperger's Syndrome' quite condesending.

Particularly because of a chapter written by a Neurotypical girl on how AS girls can tweak themselves to fit-in with the 'queen bees'. "The Popularity Hierarchy" and "Mainstream Your Imagine" are embarassing examples of some of the essay titles. A good amount of time is also spent reading about how most teenage girls with AS have terrible hygiene and self-care problems.

I didn't realize we had a separate category, so I haven't seen any of these. But in a way, I'm not the center of that target audience.

I think what they should do is actually talk to some of us, and maybe get both sides of the story.

I've not properly read this book yet, but my mum said it's the most stupidest book she's ever read.

I was looking through and saw that chapter on 'queen bees' and crap... I thought it was really stupid.

I think somebody also wrote a book who claimed to be autistic but most experts think they were not and the book was a sham. I can't remember the specifics but somebody else might.

And the madison avenue type of propaganda aimed at young girls in general is pretty horrible.

Some of the nicest girls I've known weren't "Queen Bees".
Some of the "Queen Bees" were some of the most stressed girls. It's not easy being at the top.

I didn't go along with the manipulative popularity heirarchy at all, it's too much energy expenditure. I also couldn't understand how people in cliques were falling for the covert manipulation tactics of the "Queen Bees".

There are people called "drifters" who mix with lots of social groups and don't follow fashions slavishly. I was one of those people.

I saw it as my personal duty to befriend and help those who felt left out because I know what that feels like.

I kind of reinvented the popularity game talking to people from all sorts of groups and completely ignoring the status-quo. I was completely oblivious to the fact I was ignoring the status-quo at the time, but I enjoyed myself. I was praised for being so tolerant actually. I used to know lots of people and my best friends were honest, kind and not manipulative.

The fact that I mistakenly believed that the school I was in was a utopian world where if you're nice to people whoever they were, they're nice to you and become your friends, actually meant that part of my happy "delusion" became a reality.

That IS interesting as "hygiene and self-care" are CLEARLY "self help", and the DSM says NO clinically significant deficiencies in "self help skills"!

A Curious Incident

There are probably secondary mental health issues at play here, eg depression brought on by long term exasperation with society, particularly in relation to society's ignorance or non-acceptance of the Aspie

Also sensory and executive functioning issues probably play a role. The sequencing necessary for complex hygiene tasks might be difficult for Aspie girls, or sensory processing problems might make certain tasks unpleasant. I was one who struggled with hygiene (I still do, although I mostly manage it these days), and when I was a teenager I only showered about once every week and a half or so, because I found it difficult and unpleasant. I've gradually improved, and now shower nearly always every other day.

How does this book discriminate against those with Asperger's syndrome? If I remember correctly the book doesn't even state he has AS. =|

I think I read that book somewhere. Now I have to look at it again sometime if I ever see it again.

Well, that STILL shows a DESIRE to be that way, as opposed to an inability.



Well, I am glad to hear you improved. I guess I STILL don't understand the sequencing problem. I guess I should be happy that I can take a shower and have each hand washing a different part from the pate of my head, to the soles of my feet. There IS about a 5cm square place in my back I can't hit(due to arm/hand flexibility). 8-( I guess I should get something to handle that, though I DO manage to get soap and water there, and use a towel. I also tend to get lost in thought(thinking about yesterday and tomorrow). So I guess I don't have a sequencing problem there.

At least females probably don't have the problems that males do with perspiration, etc... If I went to highschool, and didn't shower for a week, YIKES! In fact I went to a boarding school once and the few times I DID go to PE, my next period class complained when I didn't shower. I just didn't like the idea of showering in public. I usually DIDN'T go to PE though.

It says on the back cover.

And I tried reading Girls and Asperger Syndrome, and stopped reading it. It was a little insulting.

I didn't finish reading 'Girls and Asperger's Syndrome' either, but more because I thought it wasn't relevant to me. I didn't find it insulting because I tend not to 'get' insults. I just don't notice them. But I did think that chapter on fitting in with 'queen bees' and such was a bit silly.