MOVING FROM ONE PLACE TO ANOTHER - HOW TO COPE?

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Joined: 15 Nov 2008
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18 Feb 2009, 10:20 am

So in the last eight months I moved three times. Now I have to move again...

And it's so confusing and depressing... I feel like I am loosing another asylum. I can't cope with emotions which I have inside... Evertime I get used to some place or get attached to some people - I have to leave it and start all over again... It's devastating.

On one hand I feel good - because changes could make my life somewhat better; on the other hand - I am scared and I feel terrible (bacause I'll have to get to all new and unpredictable enviornment). I'm being torn apart by this contradictory thoughts and emotions. Dont' know what to do. Anyone had ever been in situation like that? Anyone can explain why I am feeling all those opposite feelings at one time? Anger. Relief. Fear. Calmness. Bitterness. Joy. Frustration. Apathy. Hope. Hopelessness. Grief. Happiness...

whitetiger
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18 Feb 2009, 10:32 am

I moved from Raleigh, NC to Eugene OR a month ago. I had more anxiety than usual for sure. It was hard to give up my comfort level and what I was used to. I wish you the best with your move. It's harder on aspies, as you probably know. We get attached to our environents and the familiarity of them.

ouinon
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18 Feb 2009, 10:47 am

ReGiFroLa wrote:

Moving from place to place ... how to cope?

Reduce overload.

You could start with something you actually own and have control over; protecting the 300 square meters of your gut from exhausting/difficult to digest foods. That makes a huge difference.

I used to do it almost without thinking about it sometimes. Travelling/attending a weekend residential course/moving; I often ate only dried fruit and nuts, or fresh fruit and raw veg esp. avocado. And for the last 16 months I have been completely excluding gluten. Now I'm cutting out starch/complex carbohydrates too.

300 square meters is a huge area, 150 times bigger than our skin, ( and AS are hypersensitive ) It is exposed 24 hours a day, seven days a week, to the environment/outside world, ( in the form of food ), so it's definitely worth starting with that.

Maditude
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18 Feb 2009, 11:06 am

I would concentrate on maintaining whatever comfort zone you are able to keep. I have moved 25 times in my life. I think the thing that helps me the most is that I don't have too many possessions.

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ouinon
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18 Feb 2009, 11:11 am

Maditude wrote:

I would concentrate on maintaining whatever comfort zone you are able to keep.

That makes the gut/intestines the best, most practical comfort zone of all! Keep it comfortable. :wink:

sbcmetroguy
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18 Feb 2009, 11:14 am

I want very badly to live in Chicago or San Francisco, but I know if I ever get to live in either place, I won't know what to do. I naturally resist change, so I have lived within 85 miles of my birth home all my life. When I was dating my wife, it was a condition that I made clear from the start: I wasn't moving to be with her, she would move to be with me. At the time I had no idea that it was related to AS; I knew I didn't like change. I just had no idea why.

ReGiFroFoLa
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18 Feb 2009, 11:21 am

Maditude wrote:

I would concentrate on maintaining whatever comfort zone you are able to keep.

I don't know hpw to do that... I have my stuff with me... But what about the place? What about the people?

I can't find my way of overcoming stress and anxiety. And panic attacks... Anyone can suggest something? I can't handle myself...

ouinon
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18 Feb 2009, 11:32 am

ReGiFroFoLa wrote:

Can anyone suggest something? I can't handle myself ...

ouinon wrote:

ReGiFroFoLa wrote:

Moving from place to place ... how to cope?

Reduce overload. Start with something you actually own and have control over; protecting the 300 square meters of your gut from exhausting/difficult to digest foods. It makes a huge difference.

300 square meters is a huge area, 150 times bigger than our skin, ( and AS are hypersensitive ) It is exposed 24 hours a day, seven days a week, to the environment/outside world, ( in the form of food ), so it's definitely worth starting with that.

Don't eat anything but fruit and salads and fish and/or nuts for a few days. It will definitely help.

.

KingdomOfRats
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18 Feb 2009, 1:30 pm

ReGiFroFoLa wrote:

ReGiFroFoLa,
am can relate to that as have been moved around various residential homes in little time,since the local institution am lived in was shut down,each place has said a month after moving in or less am to challenging and high needs for them and have been moved out under emergency placements,so the effect from moves and never being able to settle has been very profound,and currently waiting for a new placement for a year so going through all that again.

What have always done before each move [and may help self if possible] is to visit the new place as much as possible to build up a routine with it and get used to the area.
Make picture plans of it [by taking photos of everything in the place/area],and plan everything out on paper of what is going to happen.

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drcancerman
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18 Feb 2009, 2:02 pm

I've always moved in my life, since I was little, like 3 years old. Not to the same country, but to different ones, Brazil, Argentina, Guatemala, Uk... and each time it was difficult, and I experienced the same feelings you are experiecing now.

From guatemala to Uk, I experienced relief, because I was running away from bullies, headaches, problems and more bullies, did I mention bullies? Even the principal from my school back then(~I moved to the uk in 2003) was a bully, and he bullied me. At the same time I experienced fear, because it was everything new, language, culture...

I wasn't spared the same fate when I returned to my home country (7 years old till 12 ish), it was an alien culture to me as well.

I simpatize with you.

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