Need help preventing a meltdown! ASAP!! !! !!

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Hi Ive been very stressed lately and it is makeing me feel like having a meltdown.

I need advice on how to prevent it.

My room mate's have not seen me have a melt down and I think they would kick me out if they saw it.

Any tips are welcome, even if they sond strange. As long as they work I'm willing to try almost anything!! !! !

PS. this is sensory based and emotinal based.

Ths is the kind of melt down I have head banging and all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-tGimFA ... annel_page

Well it's way past 11:35 so I imagine that you've already melted down. If you got thru this one keep in mind that eating some really spicy food actually helps. I'm not kidding. The jolt kind of resits the brain triggers.

Uhh ... let me get back to you on this, okay?

I love the sound of wind chimes. Or a show, like on pbs, that makes me cry, from the love I feel, watching someone doing something very good for others.

Anything that brings me joy, that is sound related, is sure to snap me into the conscious world, long enough to think, outside of the emotional and intellectual distresses.

My friend endures hitting his head on my slightly too low placed wind chimes, because every time I hear that, I laugh and know he doesn't mind, for what it brings me.

I did take them down though, I will put them back up when I manage to get to the store and buy another hook. But that occurrence did teach me a wonderful life changing lesson, that no matter how deep I am, or how entrenched in turmoil, there is a sound for every job. For me at least.

Hope this helps xx Oooh and please remember to treat a meltdown like an epileptic seizure, very gently! A lot of us on the spectrum do have epileptiform activity in our brains. Just a thought. Ohhh and we call meltdowns tsunamis's that way we can grade them!!

We call those on the spectrum JELIBEANS AND NEUROTYPICALS MARSHMALLOWS!! Just remember that when you read this! ok!



Because spectrum children and adults work so strongly in local (perceptual) processing, the amount of sensory detail they have to deal with can be overwhelming. It can also be difficult for them to select the most important instruction or piece of information they've been given, and this, too can be overwhelming. They can then go into 'meltdown', which used to be called 'temper tantrums' in the bad old days. Jelibean calls them tsunamis, and here's her description of what can cause them, and how to deal with them:


WHAT STARTS A TSUNAMI?



1. I've asked my kids and their most common trigger is FRUSTRATION. Imagine your child in the classroom trying REALLY hard. If your child has for example Dyslexia, s/he will quite obviously have difficulties in specific areas. With jellybeans you see it may not be as obvious, it may be a particular lesson that's coming up, a break time that proved stressful or just trouble ruling a margin on a page. It can be the smallest of things to trigger the feelings of frustration. Frustration when accompanied with increased stimming is a sure fire way to see the early warning signs.

2. COVER UP. This is also a common reason for a Tsunami, the time your little jellybean HAS done something wrong and is so angry with themselves that the anger is overwhelming and they get so cross that they punish themselves and others. Apologies are hard when your skin is leaking like a colander, your arms are flinging and flanging and your face is screwed up like last week's homework. The Tsunami is in a kind of bizarre apology, a recognition that they know they've done something that they shouldn't have. They are very sensitive and even when they have been a little devil, most know it and do beat themselves up.

3. SENSORY OVERLOAD. This is the most common reason in jellybeans who may have over-sensitive reactions to their surroundings - to light, heat, clothing, sounds, smells. Remember that to these jellybeans it may feel sometimes that every single thing in the room is trying to attack them. Why? Because they actually CAN'T filter anything out. Everything can hits them too hard and too fast, all simultaneously sometimes. They may feel too hot (remember their thermostats can be set far too high), and at the same time they can hear the neon light making a deafening buzz. Someone in the room is chewing a sweet and that sounds in their ears like a whole swarm of bees. Dinner is cooking and your jellybean can smell every ingredient, just as if he had his nose right inside every cooking pot and saucepan. Light is coming through the window and dancing about all over the place like pieces of blinding broken glass. And you're speaking to him and your voice sounds as if it's amplified so loud that it's completely distorted - it's like having his ear next to an amp at a rock concert. Is it any wonder he suddenly starts to scream and shout at everything just to STOP AND SHUT UP AND GET OUT OF HIS FACE?

4. INFORMATION OVERLOAD. This is a particular problem to jellybeans who may not be able to listen for very long. Did you know, some jellybeans actually can't listen and look at the same time? They have to do one or the other, but may not be able to do both simultaneously. So, if you're giving too many instructions too fast and these instructions are complicated and involve shifting between listening and looking, and if there's an emotional edge to what you're saying, too, that puts your jellybean's brain into free fall. It's like a computer crash.

The best way to cope is to deal with them, and trust me they need dealing with. TSUNAMIS are DANGEROUS. It's as though we lose control and although we may be sort of aware of what we're doing we just can't stop. As a parent you really do need to alert everyone to Tsunami-spotting and try to stop it before it runs its full course. It comes on in waves, sometimes out of nowhere, and CAN be halted in the first wave, which lasts about 20 to 30 seconds, but after that it's as if we're drowning under successive storming and crashing waves of panic, fury, frustration. Our brains go down under it all. It's a very scary experience, for us, as well as anyone who may be around, and WE NEED HELP PLEASE!

WHAT YOU CAN DO TO HELP - WITHIN THE FIRST 20 SECONDS

1. Speak to us and tell us firmly and in a single word that we are getting out of control.

2. DON'T TOUCH US!! !! !! Touch puts us into even more overload.

3. Don't give us a lecture - we can't HEAR.

4. Leave us alone, let US have the last word.

5. LET US RUN, if necessary, out of the door, upstairs to the bedroom or to lock ourselves in the bathroom.

6. When we emerge SAY NOTHING about it, ignore us when we reappear, we are probably a bit sulky still so let us be. We will communicate with YOU when we are ready.

WHAT CAN THE TEACHER IN THE CLASSROOM DO?

1 Don't Panic. Speak clearly and firmly - just one word is best.

2 Distract the jellybean with something that they are good at. SUBTLY

3 Remove the jellybean from the classroom with one adult to a quieter more private area.

4 Allow the child to STIM and don't crowd them, just be kind and keep them SAFE.

5 Allow the child to let off steam physically, allow them to RUN and run and run, the playground being preferable to the school car park.

6 Reassure and stay in the background. The child will wind down.

7 Don't threaten with anyone or anything.

Finally on Tsunamis, DON'T TOUCH. Unless you are invited to, try and avoid the temptation of hugging a distressed jellybean, even when you think its safe, it MAY NOT BE!

I'd like to add just one thing here. I tell parents, teachers and carers to treat a meltdown as if it was an epileptic seizure, because usually there's an altered state of consciousness. And, it's worth remembering that there's an outside chance it just might be a complex partial seizure as we've discovered with Jelibeans youngest son.

www.jelibean.com/

Go someplace by yourself and do something you enjoy. Call in sick if you have to. This is not a lie; you ARE sick if you are not functional enough to go someplace without imminent meltdowns happening.

Just take some time to relax, away from anything that annoys you. Meditate, if that helps. Try comfort food--something you enjoyed as a child, that has good associations with it. (Me: Peppermint tea and ham-and-cheese sandwiches.) If you like shiny objects, grab a few and play with them. A favorite TV show, book, or CD could help too. Play with a pet. If you like physical activity, take a walk or practice your favorite sport. Hey, stare at a ceiling fan if you want to... we're all different in what relaxes us. My last-resort is usually lying down and curling up under my heavy comforter. I had a really bad day today, and despite having slept enough last night, I took a three hour nap under that heavy, warm comforter, and I felt a lot better afterward. Sleep sometimes really helps because when you sleep, your brain processes and re-organizes what you've learned; and of course it relaxes your muscles, which helps if you tend towards anxiety or physical tension.

I was just reminded that heavy exercise is good and it works very fast, like running up three or four flights of stairs.

Some of the problem is also stress from just having the roomates.

I don't work and am on dissablity . I have been avoiding going to my church for months now because I was having trobble with supressing my meltdowns.

Avoing places helped but now I feel overwhelmed just sitting in my room and that is very worrysome.

I feel like I cant keep supressing them . I feel like this wont stop untill i give in and have a melt down.

I want to i know i'll feel better but I'm so worried the people i live with will freak out.

I run around screaming at the top of my lungs, hit myself, bang on the walls ,throw stuff( never at anyone though).

Its really bad. Ive had small ones but I haven had one like that sence early highschool. That was years ago.

I dont know what to do?

All I can think of is change. Change your clothes, change your location, change your appearance, change everything you can get your hands on if only just temporarily.

My weighted blanket helps immensley! I couldn't do without. Also reduce stimuli entirely, if possible. I had a horrific meltdown last evening....sigh. I'm recovering today and trying very hard. I hope you feel better soon.

Thank you jelibean! Very well done list.

About weighted blankets (indicated for autism): Yes, they can be expensive but beyond worth the cost! Some med insurance will cover and it's a one-time cost. My weighted blanket is over-heavy for me but I like this and many do. You may check the website for guidelines and selections.

www.weightedblanket.net (Dream Catcher's Blanket)

advice about weighted blankets: Don't choose those made with navy beans or rice (organic matter) since this will degrade over time and, so I'm told, can even attract insects or rodents (yuck)! Choose poly beads instead - clean and hygenic, even washable. Made with fabric/texture of your choice.

Also, I use a digital metronome with a visual pendulum. This helps...a lot! You can buy one at any music store locally.

I find singing to myself and rocking to be quite soothing. It brought me out of my last meltdown.